Hear this

[William55]

Okay where do I start,

 

Okay....I am with all those who are suffering from a broken heart.

Guys/Gals if you ever seen "Rudolph" the clay animation Christmas standard, it features a segment about lost toys or broken toys or something like that.

The one thing you have got to notice is that they were not alone, they were surround by other dysfuntional toys.

I'm not suggesting that anybody here is dysfunctional, on the contrary, we are all very much human. And all very much special.

The emphasis is that we have each other.

I have been amazed at the collected advise on these forums. Such wisdom and care is special indeed. I love you people, you are so much more than words on a screen.

Best advise is NO CONTACT. Best advise is to embrace that no contact, not on the presumtion that he/she will come back to you based on the allure of no contact, but from the position that you moved forward.

Not to suggest that by this method, you find reconcilliation impossible. In fact, it is the only plausable strategy within your grasp to make that be. But do not make that stategy as the primary blueprint in recovery.

Move on. If it is meant to be that you are to reunite, then it will accelerate the process. If in turn it was not meant to be, then you have embraced your independence and have taken solid steps in finding YOU.

Do not, and I emphasis DO NOT undertake barginning, pleading, or any other emotional surrender. It will undermine you growth thru this process and will defeat any hope of reconciliation.

There may be broken toys by some peoples standard but there are others who would glady accept those that have been tossed away.

[L.J.]

Thanks, William, for the advise and encouragement. The process of recovering seems possible after reading your post. I agree with you that we are not alone, I'm not alone. Indeed, the words and advise I gathered from this forum are posted by truly wonderful people.

 

Cheers!

[William55]

Thanks L.J.

Those words are for me, as much as for they are for anyone.

I miss my girl so bad I just ache inside.

It's a beautiful day outside and I just can't appreciate it.

Everyday I try to gather enough strength to move on.

I am so preoccupied with thinking about her that everything else seems obtrusive or unimportant.

I say to myself that I am getting better and I know that I progressed from begging to NC but, I hurt as much today as in the past. In fact, as time moves on it only serves to enforce my belief that she has left me forever.

I'm sitting at home now. It used to be our home. I am surrounded by memories and they creep into my heart and fill me with despair.

I pray often. I know that what I am doing is prolonging the hurt but I cannot pretend to feel otherwise.

It will be a long time before I get right. I'm just taking it one day at a time.

[L.J.]

William, you seem to be a sentimental guy like me. I can totally relate to how you are feeling and I understand you cannot pretend to feel otherwise. It might come accross like you are prolonging your pain but in actuality, it's a process of healing and growth. Yes, take it one day at a time. Most of us here are. I'm hoping time would slip through our fingers like sand. Hang in there and continue to post. You are not alone.

 

-Best

[kuhaaica]

I am in the same boat, my break is fresh and new, a day ago.

I am sittng in his house, where we once chatted over a cooking dinner, laughed and played with our kids, and now there are the kids and me and a huge empty alone space. i walk by our once "active" bedroom and know i will never be curled up warm in his arms again, i will never cuddle on the couch and watch movies (our favorite thing) nothing will EVER be the same and i cant bare it.

The deepest of despair i pray i will ever feel.

And the thing that sucks most about it that this has nothign to do with us or our relationshp, we are both still very much in love. It has to do with my kids and choosing to gain custody of them.

I know they come first, but it doesnt make this awful pain of letting this man walk out of our lives any better.

[William55]

I truly feel your emptiness. The world is so much different.

[kuhaaica]

I truly feel your emptiness. The world is so much different.

 

Yes so far it is, he came today (cant do NC share a 9 month old together) he wraped his arm around me and kissed my head, i began to cry without him knowing wondering if that was the last time i would ever feel his embrace.

 

I want to sleep, and sleep for days, i have 5 kids i cant do that, but i soooo wish i had the option, his life is filled with family and work and his kids, and mine is very very empty, no family no real friends. Just my kids and i cant rely on them its not fair, so i am alone, aside from this site and reading other feelings and words i have no physical comfort, no nothing, he was everything i had. :

[SuperDave71]

William55,

 

 

Your my kinid of POSITIVE person!!!

 

 

CHEERS!!!

 

 

SuperDave71

[sonjam]

Rest in Peace Bill...

[sandyv]

Bill God Bless You, and keep you safe...... and I hope you are at peace love, you did the best you possibly could, you loved with all of your heart......

 

 

Sandy

[Vynde]

Bill. Thinking of you. You touched my heart in a great way, and made a difference in my life. You will be missed.

 

God Bless my dear friend.

 

Respectfully yours,

John