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L.J.

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L.J. last won the day on November 13 2006

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  1. L.J.
    Dilly !! Long time no see. How are you? How's the new baby? You are a new mom, aren't you? Hugs to you and the newborn ... on the way with the next warm breeze.
  2. L.J.
    Of course you can ... as long as you don't bring the past to the table. Jump over the bridge and build wings on your way down ... breathe ... smell the freedom ... you're liberated !!!
  3. L.J.
    That's the whole point of the process ... you are familiarizing life afresh. There's nothing disloyal about it. Leave the past behind and enjoy getting to know your reconnected friend better. Have a blast ....
  4. L.J.
    Indeed you are not alone. You have virtual friends and a good support system in the real world. Seem like you're doing all the right things, getting in touch with old friends and reconnecting with not so old ones. Everybody deserves to live and laugh a little... or a lot. Why would you want to stay home on a Friday night obsessing about the negative? Go bowl and dine .. have fun !
  5. L.J.
    When we live our lives long enough for or with others, it's easy to forget ourselves. Sometime our expectations are focused on the people around us, what we want them to be, who we want them to be. We only want the best for them. Maybe it's time to focus on yourself. Push boundaries ... is there something you want to live for? Be the person you want to be .... for yourself, for your kids? You are NOT alone. We are here with you.
  6. L.J.
    Hey ITG, Sorry to hear what you are going through but it's an astute decision though. There's no intrinsic value in this relationship if he walks out every time the wind blows cold. You've deprecated his behavior for quite some time already. We've talked about this. Now you have the strength to strip the romance of the pretense of beauty.
  7. L.J.
    Two months is not a very long time. I remember when I first dated my ex, I was always afraid to call too often or too late. It takes time to figure out the comfy zone. You can express your liking for him to check in and it's okay too to check on him too. It's nice for him to hear from you also. Congratulation on your relationship and a very Happy New Year to the both of you.
  8. L.J.
    Hey ITG, You are strong and your calamity will pass, yield not to it. You know why you're prolonging the inevitable but you don't know what you're prolonging the inevitable for. Unless J decide to sail along or until you decide to sail alone, you can't chart your map. Thus, you are lost. Round and round you go while sitting on the fence. Season's greetings to you and your children. Best wishes for the Holidays.
  9. L.J.
    In actuality, it is the second nastiest pill. Being cheated is the nastiest. You've already swallowed the first. We always have a choices. You are on step two and making good choices for step three for your well-being.
  10. L.J.
    Reverse gender role. Pretend to be one of the women writing your post and read it again. The question you have will answer itself.... He who dig a pit for his brother will himself fall into it .
  11. L.J.
    He has a tendency to go off tangent and not dealing with root issue. Whether you wanted him to leave or not, the business of your paying the bills is irrelevant. Is he interested in shared responsibility in expenses or is he interested in sharing a healthy relationship? He can pack and leave every time or he can pay all the bills he wants, the problem in your relationship is still prominent. It doesn't go away, does it?
  12. L.J.
    Not entirely two years are wasted. Try not to think about the lost, but the gain ... growth. In healing, coming to term with what is, is the key (acceptance). What could you have done better or worst if he was already doing the worst one could possibly do by cheating? What can you do for better or worst to yourself now?
  13. L.J.
    All the above reponses to your post are very good advises. It is a good idea to spend some time on your own to figure out your certainties. If you are not sure how to handling appointments, how can you be sure about a realtionship?
  14. L.J.
    ITG, thanks for the compli. Something good did come out of your transportation problem, you get to talk with him the way you like. Sound like you're closer to where the road forks. You do exhibit a desire to work things out in your posts. Why do you feel terrible for not being available to meet his parents? If they have questions, J has to answer, no?
  15. L.J.
    Thanks, Dilly, I am not a proponent of NC myself but advocate independent decision. Ironically, I am on NC currently. It has been painfully educational. I see it as tool for soul searching, a penultimate step to reconciliation or breaking up, not as a device to define good and evil, right or wrong. I'm growing up ... finally
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