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Interested or just being nice?


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so i went to a club for my birthday on saturday and i ran into this guy that i had a one nighter with. we run into each other all the time at clubs and usually its just a hi and bye thing unless we've both been drinking, then we usually chat a little. i was sitting on the patio by myself when he walked by. he tapped my shoulder and i waved hi and he walked over to me. he wished me happy birthday and we chatted for a bit. i told him i felt gross and he took my drink from me. when his friends came out to find him he asked if i they would mind giving me a ride home later (not that i needed one, the girls were just out on the dance floor). he put his arm around my shoulder and said everything was gonna be ok. i asked him why he only talks to me when we've been drinking. i meant when we first get to the club we kinda act like we don't see the other person but then when were drunk we're usally friendly. so thats what i meant by that i thnk he may have taken it a different way and instead asked me for my number and saved it in his phone this time. anyway he was unusually attentive to me cuz i've been super drunk before with him around and he's never been like that with me. so anyway have not heard from him yet. what do you think? not interested in me? then why be so nice to me?

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Sadly, I agree with the others. He only talks to you when your drunk because he realizes that people don't always think clearly when they are drunk and he just wants to take advantage of that.

 

You can do so much better. There's no point in wasting your time on this guy.

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Interesting. I'm curious why it takes *you* a few drinks before you get friendly with *him*...

 

While everyone is jumping on him for wanting only one thing... I'm curious if you act the same way toward him when you're *sober* as when you have been drinking...

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wow a guy does a nice thing and hes' treated immediately like he's just after sex. i guess this is why guys are jerks? no no i hear you all i do. its a joke, but really i've noticed where i loosen up when i've drunk a little where i might have been shy before.

 

what happened after the first encounter? i know for me i've probably left that impression with women where i've been intimate and then they never hear from me again. while its because i haven't worked up the nerves to talk to them about it when i'm sober. usually sitting there wantign to talk to them. then days pass, weeks pass and i never hear or call them again. then when i see them again and drink i have done as this guy has. YET it doesn't necessarily mean anything.

 

perhaps he is only after sex, but its interesting that everyone jumps to that conclusion. i mean afterall, its not like you have any control right? oh wait you do lol. so if you have an idea ahead of time that you're not looking for that or at least not right away, make that clear.

 

or you can make the guy jump through hoops to prove that he's not just after that. i know i get treated as such and now i can see why.

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Without knowing everything, I cannot really tell you if he just wants more sex or not. Once you've gotten water from the well, you may want to go back and try that well again. Or he may want more. See if he caqlls first, which would be a good sign. If he doesn't, he's not attracted enough to get past the one night stand issues. If he does, maybe something is there. But, I would assume he does not call. In the future treat him as if he was stupid A__ for not calling because it would have been good for him.

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Without knowing everything, I cannot really tell you if he just wants more sex or not. Once you've gotten water from the well, you may want to go back and try that well again. Or he may want more. See if he caqlls first, which would be a good sign. If he doesn't, he's not attracted enough to get past the one night stand issues. If he does, maybe something is there. But, I would assume he does not call. In the future treat him as if he was stupid A__ for not calling because it would have been good for him.

 

Beec...is always on the ball...he's the guru.

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What I would do is spend more time finding activities - and people to do those activities with- that are fun and do not include getting buzzed or drunk. Sounds like you are interested in this guy beyond an occasional drunken hook up. Most people I know - with exceptions (!) will not choose the drunken hook up person for a serious relationship no matter how nice she/he is when she's/he's sober and how much fun. I don't think he's a jerk at all - he probably assumes that the two of you have little in common unless you're drunk and looking to hook up - and assumes that you are fine with that scenario.

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