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kellbell

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Everything posted by kellbell

  1. Hey there, So how did the waxing go?
  2. Be honest here, How does he treat him mom, either to her face or behind her back? Perhaps you are attracted to him because he is a challenge, a person whom you are hoping to tame?
  3. Hey there, Perhaps read this article...this might help... link removed go to 'articles' then read "Identifying losers in Relationships."
  4. Hey there, I can depend what day you are in your cycle. For me, the second full day of my period is at its heaviest. So, I prefer not to that day. However, the last few days are much lighter so it is not as messy. If you decide to have sex during your period you can do a few things. You can lay old towels down on the bed or you can do it in the shower. I have noticed that orgasms help my cramps not be as intense. So, there can be a benefit of having sex during your period. It can feel better because there is more "lubrication" but I guess it depends on the person. It varies from couple to couple. You have to do what is comfortable for you and your boyfriend.
  5. Hey there, I am with arwen on this one. Anyone whom hurt me in anyway, I refused to speak to. I am just too dang stubborn and have too much pride. In the past during NC, the hardest part was wondering if the ex was with someone new and if so, what did she have that I did not.
  6. Thanks syrix!! I will request a walker this Christmas. hehe... But seriously, teacup, I can totally understand you not wanting to "waste" your childbearing years and so forth. I can definitely empathize with that. But you still have plenty of time. When things are meant to be, they will be. You cannot force it. But if this makes you feel any better, I have a very close friend, I have known for 12 years, she has had her share of relationships and was in one with a guy for about 3 years. She thought he was the one. Turned out he was not. She broke up with him and this all happened when she was like 30-31. A year later, she met an awesome guy, got married within a year. Thy got settled in their careers, bought a house, traveled, and have NO DEBT, except the house of course. They had some trouble concieving but she called me a few weeks back and she is 4 months pregnant!! And she is 37. She is doing fine, she is very healthy and has so much to offer the baby. So life does not end after 26, or even after 30. You still have plenty of time. Enjoy the time with your boyfriend and things will happen if they are meant to be.
  7. Yes, syrix is right. 26 is NOT old!!! Even if things do not work out with your boyfriend and you are 26, you STILL have plenty of time to get married and have kids. Sheesh, I guess I am old lady at 30.
  8. Hey there, Well, it sounds like honeymoon phase is coming to an end. That is normal is many relationships. You both are getting comfortable with one another and that is okay too. This is why it is crucial to get to know one another very well and establish a strong foundation. So when the honeymoon phase does wear off, the relationship will be able to sustain that transition. From what you have written in your post, I do not see the cause for any alarm. He calls when he says he will, even though it was 30 minutes later. Give the guy some slack. LOL And starting a business is VERY stressful and VERY risky. Heck, it would keep me up late at night too. Instead of being afraid of him being bored with you, why not ask him if he needs anything from you that would help. And let him know that you will support him in any way you can. You cannot make this all about you. What about him? As I can recall, are not you 20? Is not a bit a young to be thinking about marriage? It is also important for you to engage in your life and your activities. And when your boyfriend does something that makes you feel good, that makes you feel loved, tell him, thank him. Positive reinforcement. I think things are good, but moving into a different phase. Relationships evolve over time. Hang in there.
  9. Hey there, "I'm not the average 22-year-old. I'm not into clubbing or parties or things like that. Neither is he. We're both homey types. We enjoy bookstores, bowling, restaurants, walks in the park, reading together. We're more mature than most people our age. I know I'm young, but I just feel ready for marriage and motherhood. I don't think it's wrong to feel this way just because I only graduated from high school about four years ago. I see life differently from the average college kid. When I picture having a house and kids and a husband, I feel like I can't wait to get there. Of course, I'll enjoy the ride up until I do get there, but I know that it's what I want." I was exactly how you described at 22. I was not the average 22 year year old. I preferred (still do) quiet nights at home, a quiet glass of wine with a good friend, I enjoy reading, and so forth. I was a college student and received my Master's at 25. I felt I was way ahead of others and at 25, I felt I was ready for marriage and kids and all that. Now that I am 30, things have changed for me drastically since then. I am still into the same past times now as I was at 22. But, believe me, you will grow and change over the years. Trust me on this one, I felt the same way at 22 and used the same argument or scenario as you did in your post. There is absolutely no hurry to get married or to have kids. I can somewhat understand your boyfriend's reservations about being a good husband and dad BUT he needs to understand (if he is as mature as you describe him to be) he is in charge of his own actions and the course of his life. Lots of people underwent bad childhoods and turned out to be wonderful parents. I don't know, that whole talk you had last night would (for me at least) change the whole dynamic of the relationship and probably not for the better. I think if it were me, I would lose a lot of trust. But that is me. I would continue to communicate and keep a sharp eye on matters. I do not doubt you are mature and so forth, but sometimes maturity is not the be all end all sign of being ready for marriage. It also means that BOTH persons have to feel ready and really want it to work.
  10. "Is it true when a guy really wants you nothing will stand in his way?" Absolutely true. Not just for guys but for anyone. He is not the one for you. Hang in there. (((hugs)))
  11. Hey there, But didn't you tell him when he requested for the 3 week break that you did not want to go that route and to break up? So, it is in his mind that you two have officially have broken up. But even so, the fact that he even requested a 3 week break, meanwhile posted his profile on a dating website not even a week goes by after the breakup. It should show you he was not into the relationship and was going to most likely jerk you around three weeks later. To me, this is a blessing in disguise. Actions speak louder than words. Chin up and try to stay positive.
  12. Hey there, Try not hate yourself because I have noticed when folks are too hard on themselves or focus on the event too much, it increases the chance for another "opps." Try your best to let it go, you are human, with a lot of emotions at the moment and that we all make mistakes. That's all. Before you know it, you will be chuckling at yourself. There are going to be tough days and there are going to be easy days. That dreaded emotional rollercoaster and that is common. Hang in there.
  13. Hey girl, Don't sweat it. You will be okay. We all had little boo-boo's. You always have us to talk to and when you feel a little itchy to contact him, do something else to distract you. Like call a friend, go for a walk, clean out a closet, anything to keep you busy. Stay strong. We are all here for you. (((hugs)))
  14. Hey there and welcome! Well, it is my belief that relationships so early on such as yours should not have the difficulties you are experiencing now. The begninning should be fun, light, exciting. You should not feel "weirded out" 4 weeks into your relationship. I believe it is your gut telling you something and you should always listen to it. I also believe she is telling you something indirectly, about being afraid she will cheat. I feel she is saying she is not available emotionally at the moment and looking to have fun. It seems like you two are not on the same page. And the hour drive? I don't know. I feel you should not put all your eggs in one basket and keep your options open. The young lady sounds "iffy" and deep down I think you have already realized this. Take care.
  15. Please do. Actually, I was pretty excited to do it because I could not wait to see the results and how my honey would react. I was PSYCHED!!
  16. Believe me, he will. And so will you. You will be fine, no worries.
  17. Hey there, Wow, I am sorry things have been hard on the homefront. I suppose you can do a few things. You can scrounge up as much money as you can and save for your own place. Perhaps move to a place where someone is looking for a roommate, so you can split everything down the middle. As far as your healthy food goes, I would hide the food in your room or lock it up. And any perishable foods, I would perhaps buy a little fridge and stock it in there? I know a year sounds like an eternity but it really is not. You are in a tough bind. But I guess it to the point if your parents have nothing nice to say about you are what you are doing, I would just leave the room. Just because they are family, does not mean you have to tolerate that kind of treatment.
  18. Hey there, There is nothing you can really do to "prepare" per sae. I guess just make sure the hair has not been shaved recently. Really, there is nothing to be afraid of. It will be a bit uncomfortable but not agonizing. And the techinican (if she is any good) will tell you beforehand when it will be pretty uncomfortable and she may ask you to take a deep breath. That helps. The stinging lasts a few seconds. She will work in sections. It is not like she takes this huge piece of wax paper and do it all at once. YIKES!! When I had mine done for the first time, I was SOOOO glad I did it. I wondered why I waited so long. You will not see the maximim benefits of waxing (i.e. smoothness) until your second or third waxing. You will be fine. I am sure your wax technican will be great and put you at ease. Let me know how it goes.
  19. I am sure things are cool. If your ex is not adament about checking his email daily, I am sure he realizes the messages he receives are old. I know you care about how this looks to him and to yourself. We all have our follies and eventually, you will just laugh it off. Things are not as bad as they seem. You will be okay, I promise. (((hugs)))
  20. Hey there, Well, if he was observant, he would notice the date in which you sent it. True, he may not have opened until today but it would have the date you sent it. And I am sure the subject matter in the messages allures to events that were going on when you were still together. I am sure he has realized it. Even so, I know it is hard not to think of this way at this point, it does not really matter what he thinks. I would not sweat it. You realize he is not the one for you, you went out with your friends last night, you are on the right track. These things take time. Hang in there.
  21. You will be okay. You just have to give yourself a chance. And you deserve to be happy.
  22. Hey there, I read the email twice to make sure I read everything correctly and I can totally see from your perspective why this would be confusing but from the outside it makes perfect sense to me. It is my belief she is not reaching out in this email. In fact, I feel in some ways it is bit self-fulling (on her part) and more for her benefit than yours. She was justifying her behavior towards you while she up for the principle position and other things. She went on about how she got a "twisted" truth. To me, these are just excuses. She ended the relationship and IMO for your sake and hers, she sould have just maintained NC and let you go. She has dangled all these carrots all this time and this email is another carrot. From now on, I would just try not read into her actions or emails. I know it will be difficult but for your peace of mind and emotional well-being, it is for the best. That email she sent you was so can sleep at night more peaceful. I am truly sorry things have been hard. Hang in there. You are doing great.
  23. LOL, I spend so much time here. But in my experience, in high school, teachers, mentors, counselors, etc, make such a big deal about choosing your life paths, careers, colleges, I mean they put the fear in you pretty good. I mean, do not get me wrong, it is important to focus on what you think you want to do for the rest of your life, to set goals for yourself and the like...but geez. It is okay to make mistakes and make wrong decisions. Believe me, it will not be the end of the world. I can say that with great certainty. But in your case, I would find a head hunter, perhaps a temp agency and talk to people. Get yourself out there. And do you have resume together? Perhaps have someone look at it. I know I have seen books at the library on how to really jazz up your resume. Maybe you can do that. Unfortunately, hunting for a job is a numbers game. Much of the time, it is luck and being at the right place at the right time. That is why I say keep going, be persisitant.
  24. kellbell

    Am I?

    Hey there, Well, a woman can get pregnant anytime of the month, it is just some parts of the month make conception more likely than other times. If you are late, then it would make sense to get a pregnancy test. If you are afraid of your parents finding out or not being to afford one, you can look in the Yellow Pages for places like Planned Parenthood that can do tests and counseltations for free or very cheap. No sense in worrying to death about it until you know for sure. The sooner you do this, the sooner you will know about be able to decide what route you will want to take. Good luck.
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