Scotcha Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 The only reason why I ever unlocked a car door for a guy was BECAUSE of that movie. I saw it before I even started dating. It's not that I'm selfish but sometimes things like that don't cross my mind. I mean, how much work is it to unlock a door? I don't do it anymore though. Mostly because my boyfriend's car was wrecked and he had the passenger door replaced.. It looks the same but it's manuel and he has no key for it so... I stand outside until he gets in and opens it for me. My car is automatic and I just unlock all the doors at once and... DN, I'd feel so weird opening the car door for my boyfriend.. Who knows that that means? Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 So you're one your first date with your new lady and you're walking to your car. You walk her over to the passenger door, unlock it, and open it for her to get in. Then you walk around the back, and look in the window. If she doesn't reach over and unlock the door for you, you drop her off and say goodbye because you just saw the tip of the iceberg of her selfishness... I just saw that on a movie and thought I'd share it...sounds like good advice to me... meh.... I think that's a cliche. I've heard that too. sometimes I open, sometimes I don't. if I'm already in my seat and buckled in, it is awfully uncomfortable to reach over and unlock it. I don't buy it.... Link to comment
nottoogreen Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 meh.... I think that's a cliche. I've heard that too. sometimes I open, sometimes I don't. if I'm already in my seat and buckled in, it is awfully uncomfortable to reach over and unlock it. I don't buy it.... OK, friscodj has a car without central lock and belts. Link to comment
lucia Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 Y Seriously though in the 21st century cars have autolocks so a button in my pocket unlocks all the doors. And the locks on my car are sort of hidden so she probably would have trouble finding it if she wanted to. Now a better indicator is if she starts fiddling with the radio as soon as she gets into your car rather than asking you. That screams control freak. I agree with you, by the way why is it that guys in the US ummm at least in NY don't do this for girls anymore? In Europe it's something they always do ans if they don't they are considered as jerks...I'm saying it from my own experience. I'm not a princess or anything, but it's just really nice when a guy does it. I always notice those things and if he acts like a gentleman that's a huuuuuuuuuge thing! Link to comment
DN Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 If you are driving do you open the car door for your girlfriends? Do you expect them to do it for you if they are driving? If not - why not? If you expect a man to do this for you to demonstrate that he is a gentleman what do you do for him to show you are a lady? In this age of equality what does 'being a gentleman' mean anymore? Why should one gender perform little courtesies for the other that are not reciprocated? Link to comment
lucia Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 I think that if you are a real gentleman or a lady you don't even think about it. I don't expect anyone do act like this though. If a man is a gentleman that's great if not too bad. What does being a gentleman mean? It means to be polite. "Why should one gender perform little courtesies for the other that are not reciprocated?" I think that it depends sometimes it is, sometimes it's not, but it's always appreciated I think. Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 LOL - you should talk to a psychatrist about that! Link to comment
Budman Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 Ya annie, I let my imagination/sarcasm get ahold of me. I realized what I did after I said it. hehe Link to comment
brando Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 I guess with power door locks and the luxuries in cars today, we grow accustom to getting in the car and pressing the button.. I confess, i will open the passenger door for a girl i am first dating...but if i am with her for some time, then i guess i take it for granted, and just get in the car and use the power door locks...(especially when it is cold out lol) Link to comment
Budman Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 See you know what I've learned to do. I like to show chivalry, but a lot of girls will open their own door on my car (it impresses their parents if I do it) So what I do is lock the passenger door before I walk up to the house. Hehehehe, I'm evil aren't I? Link to comment
hosswhispra Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 A Bronx Tale.....I saw that movie back in 1993. I was working on the racetrack as a hotwalker--cooling horses down after their morning workouts. I wanted to be a jockey, so I went to see it because it had race scenes filmed at Aqueduct Racetrack in Jamaica, Queens. But I always remember that scene with the door, friscodj. So after that, I would always unlock the door for the guys I went out with Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 11, 2006 Share Posted June 11, 2006 If a guy opens a door for a girl, it isn't because he thinks she is weak or that she in not capable of doing it. It is done out the spirit of chivalry. He wants to make her feel special, so he does little things like opening the door, pulling out her chair. So, if a man is doing these things to make his date feel special and taken care of during a night on the town, why should he expect that she reciprocate 10 seconds later? I think expecting her to, is not chivalrous at all. Link to comment
friscodj Posted June 11, 2006 Author Share Posted June 11, 2006 If a guy opens a door for a girl, it isn't because he thinks she is weak or that she in not capable of doing it. It is done out the spirit of chivalry. He wants to make her feel special, so he does little things like opening the door, pulling out her chair. So, if a man is doing these things to make his date feel special and taken care of during a night on the town, why should he expect that she reciprocate 10 seconds later? I think expecting her to, is not chivalrous at all. The point is not the door in and of itself...it is just one of the many signs of reciprocation in a relationship...thinking about each other...a good balance that way... Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 11, 2006 Share Posted June 11, 2006 what if I don't open the door for him, but I make him a special dinner or give him a backrub next time I see him? if a guy's going to ditch me over an unopened door.... oh well, whatever. Link to comment
friscodj Posted June 11, 2006 Author Share Posted June 11, 2006 It was a line in a movie...spoken by this guy... image removed And if he says it's so...it's gotta be true... Link to comment
Haven Posted June 11, 2006 Share Posted June 11, 2006 What?!!??!!?!! One of my guy friends was explaining the "door test" to us recently. Except he totally did NOT say he ripped the idea off from a movie... I even assumed it was his original idea, and got into an argument with him about how it was a stupid way to test someone's selfishness. Link to comment
friscodj Posted June 11, 2006 Author Share Posted June 11, 2006 What?!!??!!?!! One of my guy friends was explaining the "door test" to us recently. Except he totally did NOT say he ripped the idea off from a movie... I even assumed it was his original idea, and got into an argument with him about how it was a stupid way to test someone's selfishness. Yep, he ripped it off. Now he has to answer to the man... Link to comment
AwdreeHpburn Posted June 11, 2006 Share Posted June 11, 2006 It's so totally true and it's the ONLY way to test whether or not a woman is selfish. Link to comment
nottoogreen Posted June 11, 2006 Share Posted June 11, 2006 What about fake a cramp and try to balance on him/her? I remember this story from about 25 years ago vividly as it made my mother very upset. My mother has hip problems for a long time. In a shopping centre together with one of my sisters, my mother developed accute pain and balanced herself on my sister. My sister almost jumped out from under her as she felt embarrassed (she said afterwards). Selfish? Link to comment
Haven Posted June 11, 2006 Share Posted June 11, 2006 What about fake a cramp and try to balance on him/her? Hmm.. you'd have to be a pretty good actor, though. And I'm not sure how many girls can support a guy's weight... I suppose the door test does have some merits. Although the power locks factor would make the test complicated for many, I think. Link to comment
CheerfulSprocket Posted June 11, 2006 Share Posted June 11, 2006 So now I'm curious. What's worse: not un-doing the car lock or not holding the door open for your BF/GF if you're going through it first? For me, not holding the door open is a pet peeve. For sure, I think I'd prefer the door to the car lock. Link to comment
doyathink Posted June 11, 2006 Share Posted June 11, 2006 THIS IS GOOD ADVICE! OK, so say the date went bad and you now realize that this guy is someone you really do not want to date. Just get in the car and DON'T unlock his door!!!!! Game over?!?! He now knows not to call huh? That would get you off the hook easy and you wouldn't have to make up some shallow excuse..... Link to comment
OceanEyes Posted June 11, 2006 Share Posted June 11, 2006 I think most newer cars have power/ automatic locks these days. Suppose there must be some other way of telling whether or not a woman is selfish. Getting to know her would be a good start, no? lol I've always opened the locks for my man ... since the first time we rode in a car together. He only mentioned it once, in the beginning, but now it goes without saying. I don't think it goes much deeper than this: - I don't want him to have to fuss around with his keys just to get into his car, when I am already inside and have direct access to the lock. - I would rather just 'get going' sooner. Link to comment
Kevin T Posted June 12, 2006 Share Posted June 12, 2006 So you're one your first date with your new lady and you're walking to your car. You walk her over to the passenger door, unlock it, and open it for her to get in. Then you walk around the back, and look in the window. If she doesn't reach over and unlock the door for you, you drop her off and say goodbye because you just saw the tip of the iceberg of her selfishness... I just saw that on a movie and thought I'd share it...sounds like good advice to me... Pure genius! Why didn't I think of this...? Gonna have to try this soon. (I just love screwing with people's minds by pulling stuff like this.) Link to comment
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