Women bending forward to show cleavage?

[notnormal1234]

Question primarily for the women.

I met this female friend (later twenties) I haven't seen for a few months. She tends to be the flirtatious type and is single. I've blatently stated that I would only hang out as friends. Reason being that I'm not interested in her and there are other girl that I do like. Lately, we stopped hanging out as she pissed me off by canceling plans without informing me. As a result, I never bothered to contact her. This is the first time we've met since then.

 

She was wearing a loose blouse. As we were talking and catching up on things she began leaning forward so that clearly everything could be seen. I maintained eye contact. However, she continued to lean even further forward to increase exposure, so I turned my head to stare at the wall while we converse. The tone of her voice worsened. a) Is she not aware of the complete exposure? b) Is she doing this to try and get me jealous in vengeful manner? c) Is she still trying to get my attention?

[melrich]

I think people are generally very aware of what they expose and the views they provide other people.

[walkingwithaghost]

I think she was trying to get you to notice her. That is quite pathetic.

[easyguy]

Pathetic in a easy [edited] kind of way.

[Iori_Yagami]

Oh, it is soooo simple, after all.

 

The goal of a woman in relationships is to attract more and more men (that shows her a so-called popular high-status female like in animal world) and then to choose the best of them? who suits her the most. Just like instincts tell her - show yourself as healthy and attractive, amd then choose the best of them. It doesn't mean anything serious.

 

Oh, don't you think that women centuries long beautified themselves for nothing??? It all has a purpose, despite she may actually reject the fact, it is deep in her instincts.

 

It is in their nature and it has been the most frequent case of misunderstanding between sexes - I mean, even if woman shows some mild or strong sign of attraction it never means she likes you much. It is just done for her own pleasure - the feeling that she is "the best", "worth something", etc. Men usually take it too literally, meaning she is offering herself. Noooo, that would be wat too easy.

 

That and many more is derived from differences in male and female behaviour models. It's much to learn, really.

[notnormal1234]

Thanks for confirming what I was thinking. Yes it is pathetic and direspectful to our friendship. Also, if it was a sign of attraction it comes accross as being too desperate.

[chai714]

She sounds normal to me. She made an attempt to perhaps seduce you. Maybe it is part of her seduction tactics. How is her showing her cleavage any different than her wearing makeup? Both are intended to enhance one's image and to make one more desireable or appealing. Because a girl shows cleavage does not make her an [Removed by Moderator], or any other 3rd grade insult.

[ShySoul]

Wearing makeup isn't as obvious, unless she's applying why to much makeup. There is such a thing as tact, being subtle. When you do something so obvious and blunt, its more likely to turn people off then to attract them. And the people its likely to attract aren't the best type of people to be attracting. I'd chalk it up to bad judgment that day, but that doesn't mean you should resort to insults. Everyone does things they shouldn't, as long as she doesn't make this a habit.

[wlfpack81]

She must not be attractive in your b/c otherwise you'd probably would have at least glanced as most men would. Funny seeing all these comments from these guys but come on, if a hot female friend of yours did that you'd shoot a look unless you already had a g/f or she had a b/f who was sitting with you all at the table or whatever.

[Caterina]

Exactly. I have a feeling that you wouldn't be complaining if you were attracted to her...

[ShySoul]

But he's not attracted to her, he's even said he is only interested in friendship. So doing something like that just comes off as desparate and hurts any chance she might have.

 

I'm thinking of all my female friends and I wouldn't be looking at any of them if they did something like that. Give me someone with more class. If I wanted to see her like that, I'd be going out with her. And why give everyone else in the room an eyeful as well?

[DN]

I think you could find it within yourself to be a little kinder. She is obviously attracted to you and is trying to make herself attractive. You may have stated you are not interested but that does not necessarily mean that people give up - sometimes they just want to try again. She is perhaps doing it in the only way she knows how.

 

Unless you want to end the friendship it would be kind to just go on treating her as a friend and pretend not to notice her somewhat clumsy, but probably well intentioned, attempts to win your attention in a romantic way.

[Caterina]

I am not saying that what she does was right. But she is obviously attracted to him, and we can tell that by her actions. So, I am looking at the vunerable position she is in, and thinking about her feelings. Talking about her in such a disdainful way when she is in that vulnerable position is what I am against. Shes only human, calling her a when all she did was be a bit over the top in her flirtations is a bit much.

[DN]

I am not saying that what she does was right. But she is obviously attracted to him, and we can tell that by her actions. So, I am looking at the vunerable position she is in, and thinking about her feelings. Talking about her in such a disdainful way when she is in that vulnerable position is what I am against. Shes only human, calling her a *beep* when all she did was be a bit over the top in her flirtations is a bit much.

 

I agree - except I am not sure there what she did was wrong either. Clumsy, as I said, but that does not make her wrong or immoral.

[ShySoul]

Agreed, no reason to be rude to her. She just needs to learn that there are better ways of showing your into someone.

[notnormal1234]

Well, I'll just add a little more for those interested. We're not talking about some tasteful cleavage. We're talking about showing the whole thing, well actually two whole things. Plus, this took place while waiting at a drop in clinic, a non romantic environment. Second, I am seeing other women. Third, she's a friend of a friend and I agreed to hang out as a friend since we had some common interest. Fourth, I've blatantly stated more than once (since we first met) that we'd hang out as friends. She's disrespecting our friendship by doing things like this so i'll probably end it as there are other people to hang out with

 

So obviously this was no accident. Thanks for all the input! However, I'd like to hear a few more opinions from the women out there.

[DLxX]

So are you attracted to her or not? I'm a guy and if I was in that position I would probably at least take a quick glance and then gauge her reaction to see whether or not it was done on purpose. I don't really get what you mean by it was all hanging out. Is she overweight?

[ShySoul]

If he noticed she was doing that then he must have had a glance to know. He clearly didn't like the display.

 

Now, I wouldn't end the friendship unless she makes a habit of doing this stuff. But if you find her to be too vulgar for your tastes, thats ok.

[queenofvalidation]

Hey notnormal,

 

At first I was puzzled by your response to her unwelcomed advance.

I was in a group setting recently (3 women, 1 man) and one of the women prolonged exposing her cleavage to the man. I noticed that he swatted her on the behind about a half hour later. We were not in a romantic setting either.

 

Was he disrespecting her or was he attracted?

[DLxX]

attraction..........