I don't know what to do

[Randomthoughts]

This person I talked to last year until recently when I ended it. 

We hit it off pretty quickly but then it started to become only sexual talks.

I didn't want that so I ended it. But they've started to try talking to me again.

In the beginning had feelings for them but now it's become annoyance but at the same time I felt drawn in an obsessive way which I hated. 

They say they learnt dark psychology so I feel like they were messing with me to get their way.

I'm emotionally and physically drawn to them to a point where they're my only thought. I've also been stalking their socials alot which ive failed to avoid. I don't know whether it's love or something else. But I seriously don't know what to do and it feels like there is something wrong with me. I need advice.

[Wiseman2]

7 minutes ago, Justaskingforhelp said:

.They say they learnt dark psychology so I feel like they were messing with me to get their way.

I'm emotionally and physically drawn to them to a point where they're my only thought. I seriously don't know what to do and it feels like there is something wrong with me. I need advice.

How did you encounter them? Have you met in person?   Hopefully you haven't sent nudes or given out any personally identifying data or details.

This seems like a scammer or catfish who is giving you BS about voodoo or whatever to scam you. Its as simple as delete and block this weird entity.

Perhaps reflect what voids and emptiness led you down this dark path. Are you lonely or isolated? 

[smackie9]

Block/delete their number. Stop stalking their SM. Find other things to do with your time. Go for a walk, go pet a dog something that is positive. 

[Randomthoughts]

23 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

How did you encounter them? Have you met in person?   Hopefully you haven't sent nudes or given out any personally identifying data or details.

This seems like a scammer or catfish who is giving you BS about voodoo or whatever to scam you. Its as simple as delete and block this weird entity.

Perhaps reflect what voids and emptiness led you down this dark path. Are you lonely or isolated? 

We met though school and yes we've already met in person but nothing overly physically has ever happened. 

I've already graduated, I was a year older than them but didn't expect it to spiral into what it was. We don't meet or see eachother but im always hearing stuff about them because my sibling goes to the same school. 

I haven't sent nudes but they have. 

I was thinking to make another post about family trauma and not healing from previous relationships.

Ive had trouble with relationships for as long as I can remember. Which is why I feel like it's my fault for not being able to leave. 

 

[catfeeder]

You've done the right thing by ending it, so it's not that you're not able. Keep giving yourself credit for that, and stop telling yourself that you can't. Allow yourself some grieving time each day, but schedule commitments with other people that you will not break. This will force you to stop living in your head, and it will help you to feel better and appreciated. Keep taking baby steps in the right direction.

[Randomthoughts]

22 minutes ago, smackie9 said:

Block/delete their number. Stop stalking their SM. Find other things to do with your time. Go for a walk, go pet a dog something that is positive. 

I've tried multiple times to do this, I always find myself going to it's an anonymous websites to check their stories.

I've tried trying to clear my mind and walking many times. I've tried being honest with myself and saying this isn't who I want to be. 

But it all fails as soon as I see something related to them.  I'm scared that, that's all I'll be doing. Just losing all progress that I've made.

[catfeeder]

Just now, Justaskingforhelp said:

I've tried multiple times to do this...

But it all fails as soon as I see something related to them. 

It's not a fail, it's part of a process. Just keep envisioning the freedom and confidence you will enjoy soon, and keep taking the next step in that direction.

Decide that you are more important to yourself than him.

Head high.

[TeeDee]

It's definitely not love.  It's more like an unhealthy obsession.  

You would do well to exercise more self control.  Tell your sibling that you don't want to hear about this person.  Find more constructive uses of your time.  

[Andrina]

What do you do outside of your house and off the phone/computer? Do you hang out with girlfriends? Do you have any hobbies or have you joined any school groups?

Delete/block him on every gadget. Refrain from any romance for now. You're in a mental state where you'll only be attracted to, and attract, toxic guys.

Actually the secret to eventually being successful in romance is to first build a fulfilling life solo. When you have a support system of friends, have a passion for an interest/hobby/volunteer work, then you will be ready to choose a guy wisely and have standards. The guy will be someone to add joy to your life, versus a guy being the sole reason for your joy, which is never healthy.

Good luck.

[ShySoul]

Don't just block them, stay off social media all together. Get out and find other activites and things to keep you busy. Stay so busy you don't have time to think of them. School, work, volunteering... whatever you need to do to focus on your life. You need to be happy with yourself first, need to focus on where you are going and the things you want to do. He's a distraction that would help you in the long run. So do whatever you have to do remove him from your life.

On 4/16/2024 at 3:13 PM, Randomthoughts said:

But it all fails as soon as I see something related to them.  I'm scared that, that's all I'll be doing. Just losing all progress that I've made.

We all fail. We all take steps backwards at time. That's okay. It doesn't mean you've lost all progress though. Just take two steps forward for every one back. Keep pushing through day by day, little by little. You have the strength inside you. You can do it. 

Keep the faith.