Randomthoughts

I've tried multiple times to do this, I always find myself going to it's an anonymous websites to check their stories. I've tried trying to clear my mind and walking many times. I've tried being honest with myself and saying this isn't who I want to be. But it all fails as soon as I see something related to them. I'm scared that, that's all I'll be doing. Just losing all progress that I've made.

We met though school and yes we've already met in person but nothing overly physically has ever happened. I've already graduated, I was a year older than them but didn't expect it to spiral into what it was. We don't meet or see eachother but im always hearing stuff about them because my sibling goes to the same school. I haven't sent nudes but they have. I was thinking to make another post about family trauma and not healing from previous relationships. Ive had trouble with relationships for as long as I can remember. Which is why I feel like it's my fault for not being able to leave.

This person I talked to last year until recently when I ended it. We hit it off pretty quickly but then it started to become only sexual talks. I didn't want that so I ended it. But they've started to try talking to me again. In the beginning had feelings for them but now it's become annoyance but at the same time I felt drawn in an obsessive way which I hated. They say they learnt dark psychology so I feel like they were messing with me to get their way. I'm emotionally and physically drawn to them to a point where they're my only thought. I've also been stalking their socials alot which ive failed to avoid. I don't know whether it's love or something else. But I seriously don't know what to do and it feels like there is something wrong with me. I need advice.