I (22M) had a fun date with a girl (20F), but ended weirdly. How to proceed?

[aaaaaaaargh]

Met this girl from Tinder today. We shared (my thoughts, her words) a great two hours (cocktails then dessert then at a park). Lots of touch, laughs and what I'd consider mutual interest.

At the park, we were lying down next to each other when she suddenly got up to see the community bookshelf. We browsed it for a bit and then sat on a bench and looked at stuff on her phone.
I asked for a kiss, she said no if that's okay. I asked if I'll see her again to which she replied she doesn't know, she had a lot of fun but is a little complex, and I replied she could sleep on it.
I know she's about a month out from a two-year relationship, and speculating/hoping that this might be too much too soon type thing.

What should I do? Text her in the morning? The next evening? Nothing at all? Really lost on this one and want to make this work.

[Batya33]

I would text her and just be direct. "I had a nice time meeting you. I'd love to take you out on another date.  If you're interested please let me know which day you are free this weekend. I am free [then add any times you are not.]

I wouldn't reference her comments etc. My sense is she will decline but then you will know you tried.

[Wiseman2]

4 minutes ago, aaaaaaaargh said:

I asked for a kiss, she said no if that's okay. I asked if I'll see her again to which she replied she doesn't know, she had a lot of fun but is a little complex, 

You could text her a simple "had a nice time" type of text in a day or so and leave the ball in her court with "let me know if you would like to get together again". But then drop it and see if she replies. 

[Andrina]

1 hour ago, aaaaaaaargh said:

I asked if I'll see her again to which she replied she doesn't know, she had a lot of fun but is a little complex, and I replied she could sleep on it.

IMO, you left the ball in her court. I'd leave it there for her to lob back or not. Doesn't seem promising.

[smackie9]

When they say "maybe" "Don't know" "I will be busy with..." "have family stuff to deal with" "Have exams" etc. She's not interested. And when they are fiddling around on their phone at the end of the date, ignoring you....that says Not Interested, how do I end this. Secondly...I remember this from my dating days...nothing worse than a guy asking for permission to kiss me. That gives me the impression the dude lacks confidence. Confidence is key for attraction. Maybe it's different now, but I recommend not doing that. If you are cuddling, holding each other, sure move in for a kiss. 

[Coily]

Give her a nice simple text, and be prepared for her to be wishy-washy and non committal. Which is your cue to find a woman who values you.

[lostandhurt]

How to handle it?  Walk right through it like it didn't happen.

 Yes send her a text.  Find something fun in your area you think she might like (exhibit, play, show, art display) and send her a text saying:  "I had a great time with you insert day and would like to get to know you better. There is a ___________ I was wanting to go see and wanted to know if you want to join me"

 You have zero to lose and if you phrase it this way it takes the pressure off and keeps it more low key.  If she is fresh out of a relationship you need to take it slow anyways of you will end up being a rebound.

Lost

[Kwothe28]

On 2/22/2024 at 1:13 AM, aaaaaaaargh said:

I asked if I'll see her again to which she replied she doesn't know, she had a lot of fun but is a little complex

If the kiss "No" wasnt an obvious one, this one is. File it under "never gona date me" and move on. If you ask why, the explanation is simple: They would never say "No" to something they deem as "potential" even if they have a boyfriend. And you literally got two "No". Just give it up on this one and dont chase and message at all.