Should I move on after our first Tinder date in the following situation?

[Scotch998]

That’s the thing she was really charming and was looking for a job. I haven’t done it yet obviously and probably won’t anymore 

[Scotch998]

And no she didn’t offer paying, but I didn’t ask even ask for it to be honest. All I just wanted was honesty the other day and got some half assed reply. I just wrote her hi, trying to engage a conversation

[MrMan1983]

1 minute ago, Scotch998 said:

really charming and was looking for a job

Did she happen to know you're someone that is a manager or similar in a position to offer jobs in advance of meeting? Probably coincidence but just curious.

[Scotch998]

She asked me what I work, I told her I work as an HR for a metal working company and could theoretically offer her an office job. 

[MrMan1983]

1 minute ago, Scotch998 said:

I just wrote her hi, trying to engage a conversation

By writing just a lowercase 'hi' to her?

[Scotch998]

We talk in Russian I wrote her like this «Привет👀»

[Scotch998]

Depending on her reaction I think I might engage further or just end it officially I guess 

[Coily]

The question I would have, is this her normal level of communication? Is that something you would accept in a GF?

Just things to contemplate as you navigate this.

[Wiseman2]

6 minutes ago, Scotch998 said:

. All I just wanted was honesty the other day and got some half assed reply

All that glitters isn't gold. Maybe she's hot. If so she can easily find someone else to buy her dinner and drinks and then disappear.

[Scotch998]

Of course not, to start off she wasn’t really talkative from the start. And wanted to meet up fast for a “coffee” If I would have deeper relation with her I would of course talk to her about this issue. But given the fact that we just met one time I can’t tell anything yet. Maybe the problem is also with me having too much hope into this. 

[MrMan1983]

7 minutes ago, Scotch998 said:

Depending on her reaction I think I might engage further or just end it officially I guess 

End what? Was a just a first date.

I would of at least said more in the message though if I was looking for a second date. Stuff like 'Hi' just get on womens nerves often as it does not give you a lot to reply to. Would of probably tried just suggesting a day to meet again in a week or so again with a date idea if it was someone I wanted to see again, then if you get another drab response (or no response) would of cut my losses.

In reality though I'm quite suspicious that she was hinting at needing a job (if she knew of your job position before meeting) and also fleecing you for a full night of drinks without even offering to get a round in, and only recently over from Ukraine. All things to bear in mind.

[RB1968]

Why after just one date, are you so obsessed to keep trying with this one?  When you find the right one, it won't be a struggle like this at all.  And for her to do that on the first date.....not good either!  I'd say "move on".

[Scotch998]

Yeah that’s why I just said hi, I don’t even want to put much effort in anymore. I already asked her for another meet. I don’t want to beg her for it and appear as eager. Yeah i got some insight now of what others think. I was just uncertain because of this lack of communication . 

[Scotch998]

Obsessed not really, but it was a nice time and she seemed to be comfortable. It was like 6 hours or so in total. Putting me inside this dark room is what created this “obsession” maybe. Because she said she’ll look forward to meet once she gets well again. But I’m not really getting the impression. So yeah you guys are probably right, it’s just sad imo maybe I’m too emotional 😂

[MrMan1983]

Just now, Scotch998 said:

it’s just sad imo maybe I’m too emotional 😂

Online dating can often be a rollercoaster, been there and still there at times. Are you fairly new to it?

[Scotch998]

Yes, not much experience in it, however that’s evil a bit. If a girl only looks forward to get a free meal and drinks how some people mentioned. 

[Scotch998]

I didn’t even ask for sex or anything like that. She was the one touching me under my shirt unnecessarily as soon as I helped her walking back home. Yet I didn’t say anything  

[Wiseman2]

41 minutes ago, Scotch998 said:

. If a girl only looks forward to get a free meal and drinks how some people mentioned. 

"Tinderella is that her profile is overly sexualized. Tinderella types of women engage in sexual relationships with men for financial gain and the Tinderella is just a’bit less obvious about it at first"

What you went through is unfortunately common. Not just the one and done aspect, but women (especially on free hookup apps like tinder) just looking for free meals and drinks.

[Scotch998]

Lesson learned 🙄 yeah it is what it is, maybe I should use another platform that’s more promising but I’m not really familiar with them, let alone sure that not most women are like this on these platforms 

[MrMan1983]

5 minutes ago, Scotch998 said:

Lesson learned 🙄 yeah it is what it is, maybe I should use another platform that’s more promising but I’m not really familiar with them, let alone sure that not most women are like this on these platforms 

Always a risk on all apps but personally find Hinge better for getting a slightly better idea of what someone is about. It's also more interactive with Q&A features and the ability to comment on peoples pics or captions before even matching. With online dating in general though you learn who seems more genuine than others with practice. For example if someone includes their instagram handle on their profiles it's a 100% no from me amongst many other factors.

Also to be honest there were a few potential red flags in what you mentioned above that could of been avoided.

I definitely would avoid anything potentially expensive on a first date though, eg. going out for expensive meals, you don't really know what they're about yet so best to keep it simpler and cheaper so you don't end up $150 down after one date. Also in general if you end up out for multiple drinks/rounds I tend to find the genuine ones do at least offer to get a drink in or split things even if you know you're happy to pay.

[kim42]

I think she's probably embarrassed. If she's interested, she's reply to your message.

I'm sure her hangover didn't last for too long, she's Slavic after all😁

[Batya33]

4 hours ago, Scotch998 said:

well, what can I say. Then the universe decided right I guess not letting it to go deeper into a relationship. However she seemed very charming and nice on the date itself. 

I'd make sure you get to know someone sober -especially since you don't want the risk of her claiming you assaulted her, etc.

[Batya33]

1 hour ago, Scotch998 said:

Obsessed not really, but it was a nice time and she seemed to be comfortable. It was like 6 hours or so in total. Putting me inside this dark room is what created this “obsession” maybe. Because she said she’ll look forward to meet once she gets well again. But I’m not really getting the impression. So yeah you guys are probably right, it’s just sad imo maybe I’m too emotional 😂

[Batya33]

Just now, Batya33 said:

1 hour ago, Scotch998 said:

Obsessed not really, but it was a nice time and she seemed to be comfortable. It was like 6 hours or so in total. Putting me inside this dark room is what created this “obsession” maybe. Because she said she’ll look forward to meet once she gets well again. But I’m not really getting the impression. So yeah you guys are probably right, it’s just sad imo maybe I’m too emotional 😂

Sorry.  Dating requires a thick skin and this was just a first meet with a stranger.  Who chose to get drunk so you really can't get to know a person who is drunk especially in a dating situation.

[Scotch998]

10 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

I'd make sure you get to know someone sober -especially since you don't want the risk of her claiming you assaulted her, etc.

Like what was I supposed to do man😆 She was not being able to walk. She didn’t even say thank you. And by the logic that she’s not obligated to anything same goes for me. I could’ve just let her sleep at the bench but I didn’t