Nervous for a date

[Andrina]

2 hours ago, Alex39 said:

He took a half day from work just to get some errands done and hang out with me. 

So this is his plan to financially get back onto his feet? To me, it shows how he rolls. Not good, either if he actually did take time off, or didn't and lied about it.

Please don't let his good looks and breadcrumbs of attention cloud you. I agree about the photo of the tire being overkill. He could've snatched that image from a website. I was getting granite countertops put in and the same thing happened, where the workman texted me a photo of his truck with the hood up, saying he wasn't coming because his truck broke down. I found out later something had been messed up on the order and the granite hadn't even arrived yet.

Try to guard your heart, if nothing else, since you're willing to give him the benefit of the doubt.

[Type O Negative]

On 7/24/2023 at 1:58 AM, Starlight925 said:

 

I'm not a driver yet even to me this really does sound like a weak excuse.. Leave the car at the petrol station and get a cab? When there's a will there's a way..sorry Alex. Really wanted to be happy for you..

[Jaunty]

6 hours ago, Sindy_0311 said:

 

I get the feeling that I am the only one seeing something really unhealthy there... 

I suspect that both Alex and the guy want to have "someone" so very much that they are skipping everything to get there, having each found a person who appears to accept them.

I don't think it's advisable, but it doesn't have to mean anything bad is going on on either side.  Just because they "signed on the dotted line" with no experiences or knowledge of each other, really, doesn't have to mean that it's not going to make it.   It's high risk though.  

 

[Sindy_0311]

2 minutes ago, Andrina said:

He could've snatched that image from a website.

I have tons of photos of my car in my library, also with flat tires, or when i smashed the door in the parking lot and even one when my oil tank exploded on the highway and the police came to clean the mess. 

[itsallgrand]

3 minutes ago, Andrina said:

So this is his plan to financially get back onto his feet? To me, it shows how he rolls. Not good, either if he actually did take time off, or didn't and lied about it.

Please don't let his good looks and breadcrumbs of attention cloud you. I agree about the photo of the tire being overkill. He could've snatched that image from a website. I was getting granite countertops put in and the same thing happened, where the workman texted me a photo of his truck with the hood up, saying he wasn't coming because his truck broke down. I found out later something had been messed up on the order and the granite hadn't even arrived yet.

Try to guard your heart, if nothing else, since you're willing to give him the benefit of the doubt.

Yeah the taking time off stood out to me too. His stories and what he says don't go together consistently.

I have this sense he is hiding things from you. Couldn't say what, though I have ideas, but he's coming across as a bull***ter to me!

 

[Jaunty]

2 hours ago, Alex39 said:

So he called me on the phone and sent me a picture. He has a flat tire. He was so apologetic. He was on the way to my house. He then asked if he could take me to dinner Thursday to make it up to me. I'm super sad. He said he was looking forward to it too. He took a half day from work just to get some errands done and hang out with me. 

 

Oh god. This is too much.

[Sindy_0311]

1 minute ago, itsallgrand said:

Yeah the taking time off stood out to me too. His stories and what he says don't go together consistently.

I have this sense he is hiding things from you. Couldn't say what, though I have ideas, but he's coming across as a bull***ter to me!

 

When you said that, I immediately thought that he has no job at all. I also think this is strange… also the shoes pictures he sent you in the beginning is suspect… 

[Type O Negative]

I do hope I'm completely wrong but he's coming across as either dead shady or simply multi-dating, along the lines of: 'Alex is a sure fire thing, let's make sure she's on standby if the other three don't work out'.. again, sorry Alex..

[Sindy_0311]

1 minute ago, Type O Negative said:

let's make sure she's on standby if the other three don't work out'.. again, sorry Alex..

Would be interesting to know at what time the conversation occurred and whether he texted during the evening or went complete silent… that for me would be a sure sign he had something/someone else to deal with… 

[Batya33]

Wait - didn’t you already have plans for Thursday ?

[Batya33]

1 minute ago, Sindy_0311 said:

Would be interesting to know at what time the conversation occurred and whether he texted during the evening or went complete silent… that for me would be a sure sign he had something/someone else to deal with… 

I thought she wrote above that he’d been texting her till about an hour before the tire mishap ??

[rainbowsandroses]

9 minutes ago, Type O Negative said:

Alex is a sure fire thing, let's make sure she's on standby if the other three don't work out'.. again, sorry Alex..

My thoughts are much more nefarious, unfortunately.  I wish my mind didn't go there but I've seen this happen way too often.  Including to my friend per my previous post. 

Spends time in her beautiful home Saturday, sees $$$, offers exclusivity Sunday.

Bides his time saying ALL the right things while tossing her scraps, until the perfect moment when he hits her up for money. 

I hope I'm wrong.

[Batya33]

1 minute ago, rainbowsandroses said:

My thoughts are much more nefarious, unfortunately.  I wish my mind didn't go there but I've seen this happen way too often.  Including to my friend per my previous post. 

Spends time in her beautiful home, sees $$$, bides his time saying ALL the right things while tossing her scraps, until the perfect moment when he hits her up for money. 

I hope I'm wrong.

I’m confused- you mean money also for the car repair? Or you mean he’s stringing her along and will forget his wallet on Thursday?

[rainbowsandroses]

8 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

I’m confused- you mean money also for the car repair? Or you mean he’s stringing her along and will forget his wallet on Thursday?

I mean, it's possible he's a male golddigger and biding his time. 

See below from Wise. 

On 7/23/2023 at 9:02 PM, Wiseman2 said:

There are men who are looking for women with resources and yes they talk about buying houses together and pooling resources and so on.

Virtually everything about him is shady from my perspective.

[Wiseman2]

On 6/24/2023 at 9:17 AM, Alex39 said:

 I had another date last night.  January of 2023 they were officially divorced. He ended up keeping the house alone. Not being able to pay for it, and now the home is in foreclosure. He stopped paying the house bill. . A bit of a red flag. 

Unfortunately the red flags for this latest event were there from the first date. He may be nice to you and say the right things, like agreeing to exclusively when you were wondering about it and it "spontaneously" came up, but please step back and look at the whole picture.

[Sindy_0311]

13 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

I thought she wrote above that he’d been texting her till about an hour before the tire mishap ??

I don’t know what time it is where she lives. But let’s pretend they planned to meet at 7pm, he got his tire issue, so I guess he would text her until 8 or 8.30. But if past 9pm he is being silent, I think it’s a bad sign. That he might be busy with someone else. Just saying that this is something I experienced with guys who were multidating. The morning after they would reply saying they fell asleep on the couch or watching tv. Lol 

[Batya33]

Just now, Sindy_0311 said:

I don’t know what time it is where she lives. But let’s pretend they planned to meet at 7pm, he got his tire issue, so I guess he would text her until 8 or 8.30. But if past 9pm he is being silent, I think it’s a bad sign. That he might be busy with someone else. Just saying that this is something I experienced with guys who were multidating. The morning after they would reply saying they fell asleep on the couch or watching tv. Lol 

Yes. I see. I agree. Also he could offer to “watch a movie “ virtually once he’s home. Etc.  you mean the crisis occurs then radio silence. 

[Sindy_0311]

6 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

Yes. I see. I agree. Also he could offer to “watch a movie “ virtually once he’s home. Etc.  you mean the crisis occurs then radio silence. 

I just mean that it’s always interesting to watch a guys behavior just after he cancels a date last minute. Is he texting as usual during the evening or even calling or is he going silent? If the later, it’s better to assume that he is busy with someone else… 

[Batya33]

2 minutes ago, Sindy_0311 said:

I just mean that it’s always interesting to watch a guys behavior just after he cancels a date last minute. Is he texting as usual during the evening or even calling or is he going silent? If the later, it’s better to assume that he is busy with someone else… 

Yes. I agree. I wouldn’t have experienced it in the same way without texting /cell phones - because typical contact was a few phone calls a week and later maybe some emails. 

[Alex39]

30 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

I thought she wrote above that he’d been texting her till about an hour before the tire mishap ??

He was texting me up until the tire incident. He even messaged me that he was on his way to my house. I honestly think this was an unfortunate incident. 

[rainbowsandroses]

1 minute ago, Alex39 said:

He was texting me up until the tire incident. He even messaged me that he was on his way to my house. I honestly think this was an unfortunate incident. 

Have you been texting/talking since he cancelled?

[Type O Negative]

1 minute ago, rainbowsandroses said:

Have you been texting/talking since he cancelled?

Was just about to post this exactly. .

Let us know Alex?

[Wiseman2]

9 minutes ago, Alex39 said:

He was texting me up until the tire incident. 

And he is supposedly home now with his friend helping him change the tire? This is what he told you? He would drive home with a tire about to blow out, away from the service station he was located at and a friend was coming over to help him change the tire? 

[Alex39]

6 minutes ago, rainbowsandroses said:

Have you been texting/talking since he cancelled?

Yes he's been consistently texting me since. No breaks. He usually goes to bed at 9/10 because he gets up at 4/5am for work. 

[Wiseman2]

18 minutes ago, Alex39 said:

Yes he's been consistently texting me since. No breaks. 

What is he texting about?