cc1999 Posted August 4, 2019 Share Posted August 4, 2019 Hi, This is my first post on this site and im just looking for a little bit of advice on relationships and friendships. I’m 19 and turning 20 shortly, I graduated highschool over 2 years ago now and have been stuck in a rut so deep im just spinning all 4 tires. Ive lost contact with most people from high school and have only seen a small part of my old friend group twice since graduating, and it wasn’t because of some falling out it’s just we never had anything in common and now I’ve basically secluded myself as I don’t like much interactions. I also recently got netflix and can understand how it is seriously addicting! and is starting to become a bit of a problem haha. I live in a small town with not much to do without going to the next towns over. I have always found it hard connecting with people and just interactions in general. I have realized I subconsciously avoid contact when in public, like the self checkouts in stores were a great invention for people like me, to be able to walk into a store get what I need and leave without saying a word! Perfect. I would like to meet some more people and maybe make new friends but being male 19 I would also like to meet girls too but thats where it gets trickier. I work in the trades and have for a year and a half since I never went to college (people really like to point out how much im missing out by not going to school and the people and girls you meet). I don’t regret not going to college but I’ll be honest those comments sometimes make me think how much I really could be missing out. With my job I sometimes work random and long hours which involves some weekends and nights, I also never know when I’ll be home or where im going so it makes hard and frustrating to make any plans to do anything. I know you’re probably thinking what kind of plans would I be making instead of trying to finish “Stranger Things” without falling asleep in the middle of an episode. But it can make it hard when planning to go away for the weekend with family. I do have issues making connections and contact with girls. I never get much interaction in my line of work since its like 99% male and 1% female to practice, so its up to me to do it the hard way! There were very few girls I was into while in school except for one, who one friend tried kinda setting us up but I struggled with what to do and how to act and it didn’t workout (my fault) and I think that didn’t help the old self esteem very much. I’ve realized how shy I can be around girls but also anyone I guess, but with just eye contact and making connections. I usually end up focusing on how to just get away before I make a fool of myself. Being the stereotypical male, I try to convince my self all is good but deep down I know its not and im not living the most healthy life mentally and im a bit lonely but just struggle with getting out and convincing my self I have too, They do call it the comfort zone for a reason! A lot of people would use social media to get in contact with old friends or people from high school, but I never had any social media accounts and dont really intend to so I would need for real world interactions. Any help/advice is appreciated thanks! Link to comment
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