lovelyworld Posted February 17, 2018 Share Posted February 17, 2018 Hi all, I have not posted here in a long time. Last year around this time I was going through a breakup and this site helped a lot. A little background, I was trying to heal from a 3 year relationship....after finally accepting I won't get back with him and incorporating NC, I was healing, and was able to meet new people. I met a guy, but realized he wanted a more FWB kind of thing after getting to know him for a month. Honestly, I felt so free then, was attracted to the guy, and wasn't looking for anything serious that I didn't mind. Anyway, my ex then (now bf) begged to get back with me, and confessed he made a mistake that he'd never make again. I still loved him even though I was finally healing, so I accepted him. This was all last summer. We became official in August 2017. I did not end my FWB with the other because we did not have feelings for each other and because we never talked consistently. It was more a once every two weeks, once a month kind of thing. But also, the main reason I did not end it is because I didn't trust my BF to not hurt me again. He flirted with girls in our previous relationship, so I assumed that after our honeymoon phase, he'd leave again. So I suppose I kept the FWB on the side in case. I don't know what to do. I feel guilty because I give my BF a hard time about him still keeping in touch with his ex. She still flirts with him on his FB. So it gave me more reason to not end the FWB. But last night, I said to myself "ugh, this is not me! I am not one to cheat" and I texted the FWB and told him I have to confess something and that I have been seeing someone else. At first, he replied, and then ignored the next texts. He probably really does only see me sexually that maybe this is does not matter to him. I should also mention that previously with my bf, we have already broken up before more than once. He's the one who ends it. So that is why I always see a breakup coming. And after being loyal for so long to him for the past 3 years and getting my heart broken, I played the game a little different this time. Is something wrong with me? I do feel better after ending it last night with the FWB. I do love my boyfriend, and he has been a lot better with me. But I'm reaching a point where I am afraid of being too faithful because I believe in the end a guy will stray. But I do not want to grow into this person that cheats without realizing it. I do not want to be afraid of getting my heart broken again. I want to have a healthy mindset with my boyfriend. I don't know what my question is in this thread, but I would appreciate any advice. Link to comment
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