Helplessbymyse Posted January 3, 2018 Share Posted January 3, 2018 So I posted on here before about this same guy whose a widower. Things are still good . But on Christmas weekend he sent me a text that I thought was his way of dumping me but reading it more he was just having a hard time over the holidays as some do. We're planning on seeing each other Friday. And talk daily still etc ... anyways how long is to long to wait for a guy to figure out what he wants and is done taking it slow and wants a relationship... I really like this guy but I don't want to spook him asking what he' waiting for but I don' want to get strung along and wait for him for then him saying he doesn't want to be with me . Ive tried going on other dates but my feelings are stronger for this guy and the others didn' work out Also here's the text he sent. I have some thinking and considering to do for myself to get my head straightened out againIve had a period like this before and went away for a few weeks which really helped ... then i replied...he said Thats nice of you to say. Ive been very sad at times lately and i just want to be with Anieke alone then. She is what i need and want to focus on, especially at the age she is at. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 3, 2018 Share Posted January 3, 2018 Unfortunately this is similar to 'need space', 'need to find myself', etc. Give him space and don't contact him unless he reaches out to you. I have some thinking and considering to do for myself to get my head straightened out again Ive had a period like this before and went away for a few weeks which really helped Ive been very sad at times lately and i just want to be with Anieke alone then. She is what i need and want to focus on, especially at the age she is at. Link to comment
DaisyMayPorter Posted January 3, 2018 Share Posted January 3, 2018 I agree - give him space and let him figure things out. It must be heartbreaking being a widow - he didn’t choose to lose/break up with his wife. Whose idea was it to see each other on Friday? Link to comment
Hollyj Posted January 3, 2018 Share Posted January 3, 2018 I would not wait around for someone I had only been on two dates with. Honestly, I wouldn't wait around for anyone. Why don't you tell him to reach out when he is in a better place. Then you need to go NC. You cannot be friends, if there are feelings. Link to comment
Helplessbymyse Posted January 3, 2018 Author Share Posted January 3, 2018 I did give him space after for 2 days it was killing me not to text him. On Christmas day I said merry Christmas he asked about what I got and that was it . He messaged me the next day I said safe drive because he was going away for the day to see family. And the next few days it was very minimal in conversing. Then new years eve til now he seems to be feeling better . And as for Fri I wouldn't say it's a date per say but I told him I'm taking my cousin swimming and he said he's probably going to go Fri to with his girl as he usually goes quite a bit. So i don't know if were just going to nod and say or actually hanging out together. But I'll take what ever he decides . Last thurs he asked me out for supper but I didn't get the message in time and he went with the in-laws. Then the other week I told him I'll be sitting at the coffee shop to waste time but then decided to go.to parents . Well turns out he wanted to surprise me and went there and waited a bit and yes I know because he sent me a pic of him there . But once again I didn't get the message in time . So we've been trying to see each other a few times well he has just I've been slacking and to slow in looking at phone Link to comment
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