Thatonedude111 Posted June 17, 2017 Share Posted June 17, 2017 So, I'm sure this situation has been asked a million times on here and I was hoping to get some reassurance on what my next move should be. Well, my situation is my ex girlfriend and I split up a little while ago (It was mutual) we dated for 5 years and she started dating a new guy. They've been dating around 3 months now. We shared an apartment together but after I found out she was dating this new guy I quickly moved out. From what I've been told by my former neighbors is that he's moved into the apartment. Anyway, I still receive phone calls and texts from her every 2 days or so from her asking what I'm doing or if I have any plans and with who also she tells me to call her whenever I'm bored. I'm really confused on why she keeps in contact with me. She is the sole initiator of all our conversations. I was wondering if I'm being strung along as sideline backup just in case they don't work out or if she's using me as an ego boost or emotional doormat to sooth her when her and her boyfriend get in a fight. Should I just cut her off completely? Link to comment
Careerchoice Posted June 17, 2017 Share Posted June 17, 2017 I was wondering if I'm being strung along as sideline backup just in case they don't work out or if she's using me as an ego boost or emotional doormat to sooth her when her and her boyfriend get in a fight. Should I just cut her off completely? You're exactly right about all of this. Plus, you'll prevent your healing as long as she's in your life. Go No Contact so you can take back control of your life. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted June 17, 2017 Share Posted June 17, 2017 All of the above. Do you want to be her second choice or backup plan? Do you want to be the guy who boosts her ego, but in between ego boosts you're supposed to sit around doing nothing? That doesn't sound appealing to me. I'd block her and be done with the nonsense. Link to comment
Thatonedude111 Posted June 18, 2017 Author Share Posted June 18, 2017 Thank you to the both of you. You both are right. This is utter nonsense keeping me in the wings. Link to comment
melancholy123 Posted June 18, 2017 Share Posted June 18, 2017 Block her! You won't get over her until there's no more contact in any way. Link to comment
Careerchoice Posted June 18, 2017 Share Posted June 18, 2017 Why didn't you block her? Because lots of times it takes building up enough strength to perform that maneuver. It's simple to say as a third party, but not easy to execute. Link to comment
Thatonedude111 Posted June 18, 2017 Author Share Posted June 18, 2017 Why didn't you block her? You know.. that is a very good question. For the longest time I was thinking we would get back together and try to make it work. However after finding out she's moved on and even moved in her new boyfriend to our old apartment. I've kept in sporadic contact with her in hopes that she'll realize she made a mistake. However after reading these responses I've learned I've been the one who's made the mistake by just not blocking her and moving on. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted June 18, 2017 Share Posted June 18, 2017 Because lots of times it takes building up enough strength to perform that maneuver. It's simple to say as a third party, but not easy to execute. She moved a guy into their apartment. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted June 18, 2017 Share Posted June 18, 2017 You know.. that is a very good question. For the longest time I was thinking we would get back together and try to make it work. However after finding out she's moved on and even moved in her new boyfriend to our old apartment. I've kept in sporadic contact with her in hopes that she'll realize she made a mistake. However after reading these responses I've learned I've been the one who's made the mistake by just not blocking her and moving on. Give yourself some peace and be done with this woman. Link to comment
Careerchoice Posted June 18, 2017 Share Posted June 18, 2017 She moved a guy into their apartment. Oh, trust me, I know. Of course it's the right thing to do. It's just hard to put into practice sometimes. We're not robots. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted June 18, 2017 Share Posted June 18, 2017 Oh, trust me, I know. Of course it's the right thing to do. It's just hard to put into practice sometimes. We're not robots. I asked a legitimate question, as she is with someone else. She is clearly stringing him along for attention. Link to comment
GrizzLeeBear Posted June 18, 2017 Share Posted June 18, 2017 It's definitely hard to finally cut someone out of your life completely, but healthier for you in the long run and will be worth it. Link to comment
Jeetsun Posted June 18, 2017 Share Posted June 18, 2017 Oh, trust me, I know. Of course it's the right thing to do. It's just hard to put into practice sometimes. We're not robots. Her pulling a move like that should make the blocking process a lot easier. Link to comment
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