Thoughts, Rants, and Musings

[reinventmyself]

On 12/30/2020 at 6:27 PM, Jibralta said:

And don't even get me started about cats...

no. . go ahead 🤣

[reinventmyself]

8 hours ago, Jibralta said:

I do think it is illegal. But I don't know if the affected employees will do anything about it.

Paula (my former coworker) forwarded me an email that Mark (one of the owners) sent out on Tuesday, which all but accuses these four employees of getting covid through their own irresponsibility. Here are some excerpts (I deleted only a couple of sentences that contained generic info/facts):

Two days later, he laid off all four employees with covid. 

Of course, Mark has no way of knowing what these four employees actually did over the holiday. And it's none of his business, anyway. Furthermore, getting covid does not mean that the infected person was irresponsible. Many people get covid despite following CDC guidelines. 

To add insult to injury, all four of these employees were working from home when they were laid off. They didn't come into the office because they had symptoms. Paula had no idea that three other people had covid until Mark sent out his email

We have essential staff going into the office(s)  Regular staff sometimes has a need to go in. They notify me and I calendar it.  Why? so essential staff is aware and for workers comp reasons. 

I posed this very question. Does staff need to report covid positive cases to HR?  99% of the staff is not going into the office, so if they've never been in in 9 mos', come down with Covid, it's not spread or communicable throughout the office.  One would think it's not our companies business.  Not to mention being strictly HIPPA compliant.  Though this HR person told me the state requires staff to report it regardless, I get the sense she wasn't entirely convicted about what she was telling me.

I don't know about your boss or the state you live in.  And I'd be very concerned about terminating staff who got sick.   It reeks of wrongful employment practices in so many ways.  I hope he has a good attorney.

 . . and were they laid off or fired?  Makes a difference. $$ Boss would be on the hook for unemployment if he laid them off.  Firing them is a chicken sh*t way out, but he puts a target on his back for wrongful termination.  It's actually against the law to terminate employment when someone is on medical leave. 

[maritalbliss86]

1 hour ago, reinventmyself said:

We have essential staff going into the office(s)  Regular staff sometimes has a need to go in. They notify me and I calendar it.  Why? so essential staff is aware and for workers comp reasons. 

I posed this very question. Does staff need to report covid positive cases to HR?  99% of the staff is not going into the office, so if they've never been in in 9 mos', come down with Covid, it's not spread or communicable throughout the office.  One would think it's not our companies business.  Not to mention being strictly HIPPA compliant.  Though this HR person told me the state requires staff to report it regardless, I get the sense she wasn't entirely convicted about what she was telling me.

I don't know about your boss or the state you live in.  And I'd be very concerned about terminating staff who got sick.   It reeks of wrongful employment practices in so many ways.  I hope he has a good attorney.

 . . and were they laid off or fired?  Makes a difference. $$ Boss would be on the hook for unemployment if he laid them off.  Firing them is a chicken sh*t way out, but he puts a target on his back for wrongful termination.  It's actually against the law to terminate employment when someone is on medical leave. 

I've personally seen employers get away with a lot, at least in our area.

One friend I know was fired because she tried to breast pump during her very short breaks (worked 12 hours as a nurse in a hospital).  She never was compensated or won wrongful termination.

 

[Jibralta]

2 hours ago, maritalbliss86 said:

The company could make the case that if they don't make an example of these people, that more employees will act irresponsibly, affecting their success as a company.

In the microcosm of this company, I think that's the intention.

But it's not the company's place, its privilege, or its power to determine who is and who isn't responsible. 

There are already laws in place protecting people from that Covid-19 discrimination. But it's up to the employees to complain. And who knows if they will. 

1 hour ago, reinventmyself said:

 . . and were they laid off or fired?  Makes a difference. $$ Boss would be on the hook for unemployment if he laid them off.

From what I understand, they are laid off. 

1 hour ago, reinventmyself said:

I hope he has a good attorney.

I hope he has a sh*tty attorney 😂

[reinventmyself]

24 minutes ago, maritalbliss86 said:

I've personally seen employers get away with a lot, at least in our area.

One friend I know was fired because she tried to breast pump during her very short breaks (worked 12 hours as a nurse in a hospital).  She never was compensated or won wrongful termination.

 

As the facility coordinator for our company, I'm the person who creates safe spaces for new moms to be able do this.

Incredible!

[Jibralta]

On 1/9/2021 at 8:54 AM, Jibralta said:

I haven't heard a word back since I sent that letter to my bio-grandmother. I know that she is very religious. I wonder if that's why she hasn't responded. Maybe she thinks I'm ungodly. 

Well, there's a lot I can say to that. But no use getting into an argument with myself. 😂

Interesting turn of events.

First, I should preface this by saying that my biological sister, Samantha, is almost as cut off from our biological father's side of the family as I am. She has met the man, but she never met any one else from his family. Not our biological siblings, not our biological grandparents, aunts, cousins, no one.

She lived literally five minutes away from our bio-dad and his "legit" family, but she grew up as a Big Secret.

A couple days ago, I sent Samantha a link to my family tree on Ancestry. I've made a lot of headway. Not only did I find generations back, but I also found all of our first cousins, who are right around her age (my sister is in her late 20s, our cousins are late 20s/early 30s). 

Samantha took a look at the tree yesterday and contacted one of our first cousins, Sally. I was a little worried for her, given the reception we'd received from our closer relatives. But Sally turned out to be really nice. 

I started texting with Sally today. She sent me all sorts of photos and info about our family. Her mom, my aunt, is willing to help me on my family tree, which is really cool.

Sally is looking into the situation with my biological grandmother. She thinks 1) I had the wrong address and 2) our grandma has moved. So, maybe I will have a chance to meet the lady, or at least speak to her!

 

 

[Jibralta]

I'm up in the middle of the night with mild indigestion. I am wondering if this might be work-related.

Today did get away from me. I had my day all planned out and then Kasey emailed me at 8AM to fix some plans and elevations on a project I've never seen before. Deadline today.

The project was in a program that I've never used and can't even run. So there was a mad dash to get someone to open it and export it for me. 

Then of course the formatting had to be changed and things had to be redesigned. Kasey (as usual) was impossible to reach and I didn't actually get to speak to her about the project until noon.

What I thought would be a peaceful Friday turned into a 12-hour day. I got the plans out, but I still need to do the elevations. I'm thinking of working over the weekend.

I like the work, to be honest. And Kasey is very mellow about all of this. I was the only one freaking out. So I wonder why I have indigestion?

Is it from my stress earlier in the day? Or is it psychosomatic in anticipation of working over the weekend? 

Maybe it's residual from the day. 

[Seraphim]

On 1/14/2021 at 5:12 PM, Jibralta said:

Interesting turn of events.

First, I should preface this by saying that my biological sister, Samantha, is almost as cut off from our biological father's side of the family as I am. She has met the man, but she never met any one else from his family. Not our biological siblings, not our biological grandparents, aunts, cousins, no one.

She lived literally five minutes away from our bio-dad and his "legit" family, but she grew up as a Big Secret.

A couple days ago, I sent Samantha a link to my family tree on Ancestry. I've made a lot of headway. Not only did I find generations back, but I also found all of our first cousins, who are right around her age (my sister is in her late 20s, our cousins are late 20s/early 30s). 

Samantha took a look at the tree yesterday and contacted one of our first cousins, Sally. I was a little worried for her, given the reception we'd received from our closer relatives. But Sally turned out to be really nice. 

I started texting with Sally today. She sent me all sorts of photos and info about our family. Her mom, my aunt, is willing to help me on my family tree, which is really cool.

Sally is looking into the situation with my biological grandmother. She thinks 1) I had the wrong address and 2) our grandma has moved. So, maybe I will have a chance to meet the lady, or at least speak to her!

 

 

It is cool you have found some nice people in your bio family. And found your sister. Do you interact with her a lot? 

[Jibralta]

Yes, we text fairly regularly. Usually just, "Hey, what's up?" But occasionally we get into it about our shared family.

I think we've had a total of three phone calls in the two years that we've known about each other. I attribute that to her young age. 

[Jibralta]

I worked all weekend on Kasey's project in order to get it to a point where I could complete all eight elevations by Monday (yesterday) c.o.b. I put it in Revit, because in my opinion, that program gives you the biggest bang for your buck.

On Monday morning, Kasey changed the plans and elevations again. I went into panic mode, knowing that the deadline was now completely unreachable, and knowing how Kasey and Simon tend to tune people out when they don't want to hear the truth. 

But I decided, eff it. I'll ask her for an extension anyway. I exported the work I'd done over the weekend, which included some attractive 3D models of the house, and emailed it to her along with my request for an extension. Then I logged off my computer and worked out for an hour 😂.

Fortunately for me, Kasey loved the drawings and granted a bit of an extension. It's not much though. And I still have major problems.

This project landed on my lap last Friday because the girl who was working on it, Dinah, called out sick. Dinah is currently working remotely from Egypt for an indeterminate period of time.

Dinah did the entire project in a program called Rhino, which I've never learned. Furthermore, my computer can't open the program due to licensing issues. So, I can't even attempt to learn it. On Friday, I couldn't even access the drawings to export them into CAD. I had to hunt around for a coworker to do it for me.

Then, the drawings came through all effed up. NOT presentable in CAD. I had to pick through, delete extraneous stuff, change line weights, etc. Basically, clean up the drawings.

So by yesterday, this project was in three different programs. Dinah tried to help me get Kasey's revisions done, but she is not very familiar with AutoCAD. So, I spent about two hours on zoom with her, trying to help her. The lag (I guess due to the 6,000 mile distance) was a KILLER. Watching the curser jerk erratically across the screen as I tried to show her how to do something made me want to smash my face into my desk. Meanwhile, time was ticking by and I was neglecting my own workload.

On top of this, Kasey decided that yesterday was a good day to schedule a project meeting with me. So an additional hour and a half of my time was shunted away from working on the deadline project. I did manage to get something out to her around 6:30pm, after working 11 hours. I am not so sure about Dinah, though. And honestly, I don't care. The deadline was completely unrealistic.

No doubt I will be saddled with more changes and another unrealistic deadline today.... I shudder to think about opening my email.

During my meeting with Kasey and Simon yesterday, we went over a townhouse project that Simon redesigned due to some setback issues. I was not involved in the redesign, and I'm afraid I caught Simon by surprise when I told him what thickness the firewalls needed to be, and the depth that the joists needed to be. He tried challenging me, but I was able to back myself up with the building code, UL standards, and an email from the contractor. 

I think that Simon doesn't like to find out that he doesn't know everything. However, he would have known all of this stuff if he had read the emails that I sent over the last two weeks. I was pretty clear about all of it.

A half hour after the meeting, he emailed me and told me not to proceed on the townhouse project until further notice. Then the civil engineer called me to find out the dirt on the project--another half an hour in the toilet on this busy day!

The company bought another of Revit, but they bought 2021 instead of 2019. The program does not down-save, so collaboration is impossible with these two programs. I told them that, but once again: deaf ears. 

Every new job comes with a new set of problems that should be easily solved, but somehow never are.

One thing I can say about my experience so far is that it's teaching me the game. And what a complex game it is! I really don't understand it yet, but I think I'm starting to learn what the deck of cards looks like, so to speak. And I'm starting to understand what kind of hands are possible. So far, I haven't seen a winning hand, at least not in architecture. Engineering, yes (but not in the last three years).

[Jibralta]

I inadvertently got into an argument with my coworker, Mike, yesterday.

I don't really care because I think the guy is a half-assed loser. But I still feel uneasy about it. 

Mike is a junior engineer. He used to work for my last employer, but we didn't work there at the same time.

This guy is maybe 26 or 27. He comes off as a bit of a know-it-all and has a tendency to try to hijack meetings. 

So far, I've given him a wide berth, let him run freely with his ego. I see zero reason to have a pissing contest with a 20-somethiing. 

As the months have passed, Mike's dropped some of his bravado, and has become a lot easier to communicate with.

The problem with Mike is that his work sucks.

It SUCKS.

He picks and chooses what he wants to do, ignores what he doesn't want to deal with, and everybody else is left in the lurch. It's really better for everyone when he is not on a project.

Yesterday, he called me to get my a decision about the project that is now on hold. This is the project that the civil engineer, Peter, talked my ear off about the other night.

I was a little confused by Mike's phone call because he had more information than I did about the building. So it really made more sense for him to make the decision. I really didn't know how to help him.

Toward the end of the phone call, Mike nonchalantly let is drop that he wasn't going to mirror the floor plans--which is what Simon asked him to do. That was a major problem, and I said, "You have to mirror the floor plans. That's a big deal."

Well, he didn't like that I said that. I detected a rise in his snark level when he said, "I am well aware that it is a big deal. But this grading is very complicated." 

I said, "Well, if you're not going to mirror the floor plans, then you have to let Simon know. And if you don't let Simon know, I am going to let Simon know. We can't detail this whole building when it's laid out wrong. The client is going to end up getting screwed. And then we are going to end up getting screwed."

So then Mike said, "I don't appreciate the hostility," and continued to prevaricate.

I waited for him to finish, and then said, "There's no hostility. You and I are not fighting. I'm just telling you what I'm going to do."

He didn't really know how to respond to that. He's really no match for me. It was almost unfair. I think he relies a lot on social hierarchies and expected me to defer to him based on his self-adulation, and the fact that he's been with the company longer and theoretically has more clout.

But like I said, I don't have a lot of respect for him, so I don't really care what he thinks of me. I'm inoculated against that nonsense.

But I still have that needling worry.... Something that always tries to scold me for standing up for myself or what I think is right.

 

[Batya33]

I can relate to why you feel uncomfortable.  And I think what you said was perfectly fine and he (I guess understandably) got defensive.  You did what was right for the client and your colleagues.

[Jibralta]

59 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

You did what was right for the client and your colleagues.

And for me!!! I'm not about to get stuck fielding that disaster down the line! 

Right as I finished composing that post, Mike texted me and Alan (the head architect) and begged out of this morning's meeting. He also said Simon was aware that he (Mike) didn't pick up all of the stipulated changes. But he was vague about what those changes actually were--could be the floor plan thing.

So, I emailed Peter, the head engineer. He was out with COVID for the past two weeks, so he's a little behind on things. He said we'll go with what Mike comes up with for now, but that he (Peter) and I should remain in close communication about things. 

That's fine with me.

[Jibralta]

Well, Mike mirrored the floor plans like he was supposed to. So, that is good.

[Jibralta]

Yesterday was an intense day. Actually, things have been pretty intense at work since Friday morning. I put 12 hours in over the weekend, 12 hours in on Monday, 10 hours in on Tuesday.

Yesterday morning (Wednesday), I met with Dinah at 7AM to coordinate the project. In the middle of our email, we received an email from Kasey, one of those horrid "compliment sandwiches" that people try to pull, basically reprimanding us for taking too long, not coordinating with each other, and working hard vs. working smart.

I was so angry about this email. It was so off-base. Kasey and Simon are freaking clueless, I swear. I responded, "Dinah and I are on a call right now and have been coordinating throughout."

After Kasey's email, my call with Dinah started to deteriorate and we briefly started bickering. I think we were both affected by the negativity. Kasey joined our call, we got some minor things sorted out, and then it was just Dinah and I again. I apologized to her for being btchy and she apologized for being annoying. Then we both rationalized the whole thing and forgave each other. And DInah also said, "Good job," which I thought was really sweet.

The thing is, Dinah is just starting out. Her experience has been limited to graphic arts. She doesn't know how to do construction documents yet, and that is a problem. I have to figure out how to utilize her while also teaching her every step of the way--and I am still learning this stuff! Dinah's lack of knowledge causes her to make some pretty significant mistakes. And I get it. I'm not mad. It's just another thing to deal with when I'm under the gun.

Another challenge is that Dinah is very eager to learn--thirsty for knowledge like I was (am). I like that. But I have to manage her enthusiasm, because the project is the priority. She's anxious for knowledge, sometimes feeling like she doesn't know enough or needs to know more before she can do something. Meanwhile, I have anxiety about the deadline, and that does not make me a patient person.

I joked to Arnold yesterday, "When I have anxiety, there is no room for anyone else's anxiety!!"

I don't want that to be the case, though. I really do want to help Dinah to learn. It will help us all in the long run. And I don't want her to have to go through what I've gone through. I just have to figure out how to balance all of this stuff.

As the morning wore on, I got more and more enraged about Kasey's email. I actually wrote out a snarky response and seriously contemplated sending it (but didn't). On my second call with Dinah, I told her about my intense anger. Dinah was not as affected as I was. She said, "I think she just doesn't understand." I thought, That's the whole problem!!!

But then I thought, Maybe it's really not that big of a deal. Maybe Kasey shot off that email in fear and frustration. She may now regret it, the way that I immediately regretted snapping at Dinah this morning. And I am grateful to Dinah for letting that roll of her back.... Maybe I should let this roll off my back.

Putting it into perspective, I know that I don't always respond well to stress. All of my rough edges tend to come out in full force. You can't talk to me. I don't want to interact, I just want to accomplish. I will smash through things to accomplish. It's not good for my relationships.

[Jibralta]

Something that's occurred to me lately: The problem we have with staffing in this company is the same problem that we had with the Durangos over the summer.

[Batya33]

1 hour ago, Jibralta said:

Putting it into perspective, I know that I don't always respond well to stress. All of my rough edges tend to come out in full force. You can't talk to me. I don't want to interact, I just want to accomplish. I will smash through things to accomplish. It's not good for my relationships.

This is really odd for this reason -I found myself -at 5am -sigh - remembering work situations that were frustrating from 20 years ago and feeling like I could have dealt with it better/could deal with it better now.  

I'm sorry you're having to deal with the new person -it sounds frustrating!

[Jibralta]

17 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

This is really odd for this reason -I found myself -at 5am -sigh - remembering work situations that were frustrating from 20 years ago and feeling like I could have dealt with it better/could deal with it better now.  

That's a coincidence!

Well, as Maya Angelou said, when you know better, you do better. Isn't that the case for us all?

18 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

I'm sorry you're having to deal with the new person -it sounds frustrating!

Thanks. But it's rewarding, too. I just had an hour-long call with her about Revit. Her enthusiasm about using a new program was energizing.

I noticed something, too. She goes off on tangents a lot when she gets excited about something--I do that too. Frustrated the hell out of my teachers when I was in school. 

Being that way myself, I know how to handle it. You just have to be firm and consistent and let her run. She'll do all the work. She just needs steady guidance.

LOL, everything goes back to horseback riding for me!!!

[Jibralta]

I'm sous viding a venison roast. I hope it comes out ok.  

I've sous vided pork, steak, and chicken, but never venison.  

I usually braise the venison roasts. Normally, I add onions, celery, juniper berries, cranberry juice, allspice. But for the sous vide I'm using a can of chipotle peppers, honey, and vinegar, blended together.

I like chipotle on the venison steaks and chops. And the braise ingredients would have been too unwieldy in a bag...

Fingers crossed that I'm not ruining the thing.... 

[Jibralta]

4 hours ago, Jibralta said:

I'm sous viding a venison roast. I hope it comes out ok.  

Well, it actually came out really good! Since I had complete control of the temperature, it came out beautifully medium rare and tender. We dried it off and put it in the fridge to cool it down before searing. That's a trick I learned to prevent the sear from overcooking the meat on the inside. 

My boyfriend prefers the braised venison roast. I can't really decide... The sous vide roast was so wonderfully tender. And had a nice flavor, but the braise is much more flavorful. The braise is tender but it does dry out the meat-there's just no fat on venison.

We've gone through all of our roasts now, but next time maybe I braise I'll add guanciale or pancetta and mushrooms. I think even just mushrooms would help with the moisture level.

As for the sous vide--we definitely have a winner across the board with the marinade. But next time, he wants to use a beef roast. 

[Jibralta]

We've fine-tuned that marinade and are now using it even without the sous vide. We eliminated the vinegar and increased the honey. The thing about venison is, it's hard to get a good crusty sear on it. But the honey helps with that. I'm glad we figured this out 🍴

[Jibralta]

On 1/27/2021 at 7:13 PM, Seraphim said:

I have no plans to shoot myself in the foot. 

Ah, this phrase.... it brings back a memory that still cracks me up to this day.

When I was in my late 20s, my ex boyfriend and I were interested in paintball. Our interest started while we were still dating, but we still played after we broke up.

He got himself a paintball gun and then bought me a Tippman for my birthday--which I still have, by the way. I actually have two paintball guns lol. 

For our very first paintball experience, we found a weekend-long paintball venue a couple of hours away. We were both excited about it.

Ed was really curious to know what it felt like to get shot. He wanted me to shoot him, but the caveat was that he got to shoot me back.

Well, I had no desire to stand there and let myself be shot. I was willing to wait until we actually played to find out what it was like. So, Ed had to wait, too.

We stayed at a local hotel and arrived at the park early in the morning to take part in the first skirmishes. We were standing by his truck, getting our gear together, when I heard a POP!! and then "OW! tssssss OW! tssssss OW! tssssss OW! tssssss OW!"

I turned to see Ed, eyes squeezed shut, grimace on his face, stomping his foot around in a tight circle, flapping his hands like a chicken 😂 

Even though we were only moments from facing a barrage of paintballs, Ed had reached the limit of his patience. He'd shot himself in his own foot to find out what being was shot like 😂😂😂😂

 

 

 

[maritalbliss86]

6 hours ago, Jibralta said:

Even though we were only moments from facing a barrage of paintballs, Ed had reached the limit of his patience. He'd shot himself in his own foot to find out what being was shot like 😂😂😂😂

 

Sometimes I just DO NOT UNDERSTAND men LOL 😂🤷‍♀️😂

But I love the entertainment though!!!! 😂❤️

[Jibralta]

3 hours ago, maritalbliss86 said:

Sometimes I just DO NOT UNDERSTAND men LOL 😂🤷‍♀️😂

But I love the entertainment though!!!! 😂❤️

Same 😂

[Jibralta]

I watched the Netflix documentary about Jeffrey Epstein yesterday. Made me so mad.

I think that I may have actually crossed paths with this lowlife in Manhattan, in the 90s. Seems unbelievable, but I really do think it was him.

I was 14. My 8th grade French class was on a class trip to a French restaurant on 5th Ave. We were all there to have French Onion Soup, of all things 😃

Everyone was the the restaurant getting their seating sorted out. I excused myself to the bathroom and snuck outside to have a cigarette. 

A well-dressed man in his 30s or 40s approached me and said, "Excuse me. I just had to stop and tell you that you're just gorgeous, standing there smoking your cigarette." And then he tried to entice me to leave with him.

I can't remember exactly how he said it, but his delivery was very casual and smooth. He told me he was wealthy, he had a limousine. I would be treated like royalty. He repeated the phrase, "roses and diamonds," a couple of times. Little did he know that roses and diamonds were two of the least interesting things to me on the planet lol. 

I found all of it extremely entertaining. I mean, I felt like I was looking pretty good that day, but check this sht out. As for the proposition: no fcking way. Thanks for the flattery dude, now move along with yourself before I scream for help. That's how I felt about it. 

I didn't smile or simper or look grateful. I didn't feel grateful. I thought he was a creepoid. I gave him a deadpan, "No," and he bustled off, saying, "I'm talking roses and diamonds here!" I guess he thought I might chase after him if he said "roses and diamonds" one more time. You can keep your roses and diamonds, dude.

And that was it. I finished my cigarette and went back upstairs to the restaurant. I told the whole class what happened, Some rich dude just offered me 'roses and diamonds' to get in his limo with him! I thought it was preposterous and laughable.  

I've thought about it since then, in abstract reverie, like What would have happened if I had said "yes," and ran off with him? Would I be a millionaire's wife right now? But my imagination could never get me past the initial revulsion of running away with someone like that; I was never really able to see myself in those shoes, under those circumstances.

I guess I started hearing the buzz about Jeffrey Epstein around 2018, after the Me Too movement intersected with some in-depth articles published by the Miami Herald.

It still didn't occur to me that the Pedophiliac Prince Charming that I ran into 27 years prior may have been Jeffrey Epstein until this summer, when I saw an interview with Maria Farmer. Maria met him in Manhattan, in 1995, just a couple years after my experience.

It was during Maria's interview that I actually looked at Jeffrey Epstein. I realized that the (dead) man I was seeing in 2020 was a white-haired version of the man I ran into in the 90s. They were cut from the same mold. Approximately the same age. I googled photos of Epstein when he was young, with darker hair... he really looked like the same man. 

And they had the same pedophiliac tastes--I did not look older than my age at 14 years old. Sht, I was confused for a college freshman when I was a 30-year old graduate student--youthful appearance has always been a blessing and a curse for me.

Watching those girls tell their stories in that Netflix documentary, I now know what would have happened if I'd traipsed off with that man. How terrible it would have been for me. I would have experienced the same crisis of conscience, of identity, that those girls experienced. 

I would not now be the wife of a millionaire. I would have been reduced to a piece of garbage, discarded and reviled by society as a prostitute, just like they were. Society doesn't see girls as children when sex and money are involved. 

Whether it was really Jeffrey Epstein that I met or not, the end result would have doubtless been the same if I had gone with him. I am so thankful that, barring a forcible kidnapping, the 14-year old me was so absolutely invulnerable to his approach. Not impressed at all.