SANQ Posted February 21, 2017 Share Posted February 21, 2017 Okay to cut it short I was dating this guy for about 5 months until I ended it due to religious differences but we still liked each other. We remain friends but it hasn't been a month yet since we ended but my ex is now involved with someone new...he talks about her all the time to me about how happy he is and how alike they are, funny etc. Now my issue is he's planning on getting her a promise ring in June but he wants ME to go with him to buy the ring next week (his new gf lives in a different state than us but she'll be moving back to our state soon actually idk when tho)...I do not know the girl at all. Is my ex trying to get a reaction out of me? Edit: he also sends me pictures of her and text messages exchanged between them Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nutbrownhare Posted February 21, 2017 Share Posted February 21, 2017 Who knows what his motivations are? Whatever, you are being invited to be a third wheel in his new relationship. Tell him that it's completely inappropriate for you to be going to buy a promise ring with him; and that it's HIS promise, not yours. And while you're at it, tell him that their correspondence should be private and you don't want to see it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angrythoughts Posted February 21, 2017 Share Posted February 21, 2017 It sounds like he's trying to make you jealous. Do you still have feelings for him ? Do you think he still likes you? If you guys have successfully entered the friend zone then it shouldn't be a big deal to help him get a promise ring for his new girl. However if there's mixed emotions in the air between you guys then I would limit contact with him. It's weird that he would shove his new girlfriend in your face constantly and then ask you to help shop for a promise ring... for a girl he's been dating for a couple weeks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShatteredMan Posted February 21, 2017 Share Posted February 21, 2017 Yeah, angrythoughts is right: He's trying to make you jealous. He's trying to leverage his rebound to get your attention and see if it will pull on your heart strings enough to make you either come back for one last fling or possible to get you back for good. Either way, he's using one person to manipulate another which speaks volumes about his character. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SANQ Posted February 21, 2017 Author Share Posted February 21, 2017 My feelings for him are complicated I only wanted what's best for him and knowing that being together was going to be a constant emotional roller coaster I "ended" it....the reason why I put it in quotation is because there was a time when they started talking as friends and he told me about it hinting on how she's amazing blah blah blah until I indirectly told him to just date her and so he asked if I'd be fine if he came to me about the relationship then ever since he talks about her sex drive, somewhat explicit pictures, their explicit convos he even pointed out a similarity that they both disliked but it was something I enjoyed...like I'm okay with him dating cool but it's annoying knowing everythinnngg lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted February 21, 2017 Share Posted February 21, 2017 He certainly is not taking what is best for YOU into account. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted February 21, 2017 Share Posted February 21, 2017 He is totally inappropriate and has no boundaries. You can only wonder what he says about you to her . Ugh! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SANQ Posted February 21, 2017 Author Share Posted February 21, 2017 He certainly is not taking what is best for YOU into account. You're probably right there was a time way before we broke up and we asked each other how would we feel if we both started dating other people, he told me he would be jealous and I told him I would be hurt but I would try to be happy for him...it's sad with him knowing that detail and still ended up rubbing it in my face anyways Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted February 21, 2017 Share Posted February 21, 2017 It's bad news to stay in touch with an ex for exactly the reasons you outline. It's a slap in the face. Tell him to go pick it out with her and stop jerking you around. Then go no contact and delete and block him. He should be loyal to his new gf and not be chatting or shopping with you. He sounds like a jerk, you dodged a bullet. What were the religious differences? Did your parents disapprove? Is his new gf and arranged dating/marriage situation?We remain friends but it hasn't been a month yet since we ended but my ex is now involved with someone new... Now my issue is he's planning on getting her a promise ring in June but he wants ME to go with him to buy the ring next week. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SANQ Posted February 21, 2017 Author Share Posted February 21, 2017 It's bad news to stay in touch with an ex for exactly the reasons you outline. It's a slap in the face. Tell him to go pick it out with her and stop jerking you around. Then go no contact and delete and block him. He should be loyal to his new gf and not be chatting or shopping with you. He sounds like a jerk, you dodged a bullet. What were the religious differences? Did your parents disapprove? Is his new gf and arranged dating/marriage situation? He is a Jehovah witness and I would lean more into being agnostic, my father didn't really accepted him but he didn't disapprove of him either. His new gf is a Jehovah witness also...they recently rekindled their friendship but it seems she liked him for a long time so now he's planning his married life with her Yea that's my thing, she is coming to our state soon idk why he won't wait until she comes to go ring shopping with her instead, I told him that I may like something she may not like but he insisted that since she's the "female version" of him she'll like what he'll like so why am I being included in this mess Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SANQ Posted February 21, 2017 Author Share Posted February 21, 2017 It's bad news to stay in touch with an ex for exactly the reasons you outline. It's a slap in the face. Tell him to go pick it out with her and stop jerking you around. Then go no contact and delete and block him. He should be loyal to his new gf and not be chatting or shopping with you. He sounds like a jerk, you dodged a bullet. What were the religious differences? Did your parents disapprove? Is his new gf and arranged dating/marriage situation? He is a Jehovah witness and i lean more towards being agnostic but I accept all religion...my dad didn't accept him but he didn't disapprove either so we still talked. His new gf is a witness also they recently rekindled their friendship after 11 months of not talking to each other but it seems like she loved him for a while so now he's planning his marriage life with her very quickly... Yea that's my thing, she is moving to our state soon from what I heard so why won't he just wait until she comes to go ring shopping with her instead I told him that she may not like what I like bc hey two different women but he insisted that since she's the "female version" of him she'll like what he'll like I still do not see the point of bringing me along if he already knows what she might like based of himself Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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