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angrythoughts

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  • Birthday May 30

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  1. He yelled at me about something stupid and we were going back and forth. His yelling became out of control so I stayed quiet. We get home and he says it’s over. Says we’re incompatible. Says there’s nothing to fix because we’re just incompatible. We’ve been rocky for a bit but working on things. He just didn’t want to work anymore. He doesn’t know but tomorrow I’ll be going home while he’s at work to move my things out. I don’t want to see or speak to him. It’ll only hurt. how do you know I have a long history of these things? And I currently do not have insurance. I travel nurse and benefits are complicated so no health insurance for now.
  2. I’m not in denial. If I was in denial I’d be a lot happier. I actually admire those that are deluded because at least they’re happy. Anyways, I wanted success stories of those that are healing, although I do appreciate the listing of the 5 stages of grief… lol
  3. I’m a week and 2 days into a break up and I feel like a complete psychopath. I spiral hard to the point where I feel like I might implode. I want to scream and cry. Nothing helps me feel better, all I do is pray to God he comes back. I am a hot mess. This feels like it’ll never go away. It feels like I’ll never find love again. I feel so crappy and I just want to hear how any of you guys out there that have been heartbroken recovered. I want to know that I will recover someday soon. I cannot take this anymore. I apologize for how dramatic I might sound but this is truly how I feel and more. thanks in advance
  4. I don’t even want to think about the moving out but I have till whenever. i figured my anxiety and depression were circumstantial, usually at an all time high when it comes to my relationships. I want to get my health in better condition but I’m struggling with how to do so. I literally don’t want to do anything. The fact that I’m outside walking is beyond me. I’ll try to focus on other things but my brain spirals out of control and into very dark places. It’s tough.
  5. My mental state is so shot right now that it’s hard to be rational and tell myself these things. It’s like my world has flipped upside down and the one person that I’d want comfort from can’t give me that. I’m out here traveling and it’s like I’m not even here. Like I’m a floating shell of a human just merely existing. I’m not sure I’ll even remember details from today. 30 really isn’t old… but I feel like others might think so, and it worries me. 😞
  6. I’m trying. I am solo traveling right now and I feel I’m at an all time low. I feel like I’m not attractive enough to find a partner at this age and I’m starting to feel super insecure. All these feelings are feelings I haven’t had before. It’s just going downhill.
  7. I’m hoping he would just make more of an effort because he wants to. That’s all I’d want from him. And yes I started seeing a therapist. Going to see her again tomorrow morning. Not sure how helpful it is but it’s a start.
  8. I’ll give the show a chance. Thanks. I am desperately praying to God, and I’m not even religious at all, that he will come back to me. I am absolutely pathetic right now. I throw up from all the panic and anxiety sometimes. It’s so bad. I feel like I should’ve done more to prevent this. Sorry I’m rambling. I’m really going through it right now and I have to live my life while not feeling like living.
  9. I just turned 30 so I’m not sure if I have to go down that route yet. I’ll consider it after I get through this heartbreak. Right now all I can think about is how a man that I loved and thought I’d marry didn’t want to be with me anymore. He no longer wanted to try and fix things. He gave up on the relationship and me. I feel so hurt to not have been chosen after all this time and experience together. I’m so devastated. I never saw this coming ever. I don’t know how to get through this. The only thoughts that come to my mind are terrible ones: he’s sleeping with other women, you’ll die alone/you’ll never find love again, you’ll be miserable for years to come etc. I really hope that I can find love again and look back at this post and laugh.
  10. Wow that is amazing. I hope I can meet my one soon. It kills me to think of him meeting and marrying someone else. I have all these intrusive thoughts that are truly stabbing me in my stomach again and again. My memories are so painful to recall. I feel so desperate. I’m going on a solo trip as we speak so I’m hoping I gain some clarity and feel better soon. I feel like I’m dying. I have hardly eaten in days.
  11. I’ve been through breakups before, especially after long periods of time. This hits different though because we live together. It’s been 5 days but I am really struggling. I’m also 30 years old and I can’t help but to feel hopeless. Like maybe I’m too old to find love and there’s no one out there for me. I don’t know what to do to move on. Even having done this before many times I don’t have the recipe to move on. I’m older now. Back then I’d go out, party, and meet people constantly. But now I don’t want to do all that. I don’t know how I’ll meet people. I’m a very sociable person but I really feel so hopeless. Not to mention the extreme stress that comes with having to move out and figure out where I’m moving to. That home is no longer my home. The life I lived is no longer. I seriously feel so horrible. I just want uplifting advice. I’m in a place right now where I’m a total grim reaper and I feel like this is the end of the road for me. I wish there was a pill to cure this kind of thing. 😭
  12. I wish the essential oil drops would do something for me, but I got covid less than a month ago and my smell has yet to return lol.
  13. Hey guys, just wanted to update everyone. I retook my test today and PASSED! I remembered I came in here crying about it and figured I'd let you all know it turned out okay in the end lol. Thanks for all the uplifting and thoughtful, kind words. 🙂
  14. Thank you again everyone! I got the official notice that my slow butt failed today. Now that I have the official results, I felt I was able to accept it and move on to a happier place. I’m coping by studying. I was going to take the week to cry at first but I’m in a better headspace to start studying today. I will learn everything possible and pass the second time for sure! I’ll keep you guys updated in a couple months. Pray for me! 🙂
  15. I’m sorry, but the point of my post was my depression due to failure. I don’t think debating over who’s better: doctors vs nurses, really matters for my topic specifically.
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