Should I entertain him?

[Billie28]

You can block him on Instagram and still have an open page.

Perhaps you are a narcissist.

[love1985]

You can block him on Instagram and still have an open page.

Perhaps you are a narcissist.

 

Or maybe you just want something to say?

[ChasingHope]

Or maybe you just want something to say?

 

This.

My definition of irony is people who spend an absurd amount of time on these boards yet think they are qualified to give "life" advice.

[greta96]

Perhaps you are a narcissist.

 

Nope. Nothing the OP has said makes her a narcissist. She obviously liked him and maybe still does, she cut him off because she had to (due to him being an a$$) not because she wanted to. Maybe she still wishes things would work out between them, and is struggling to decide whether to do something that may or may not blow up in her face. It's not a great position to be in, and putting her down and calling her names won't help one bit.

[Billie28]

This.

My definition of irony is people who spend an absurd amount of time on these boards yet think they are qualified to give "life" advice.

 

The Irony is that the OP came here looking for advice from non qualified professionals such as you and me.

Yet you think your advice is above mine. Why is that? "Chasing hope"?

The OP had already decided she will not entertain the idea of a relationship with this guy, "complains" about his contact yet leaves avenues open for his contact.

Try explain that if you are so expert on giving life advice.

If this post was on the relationship forum that i administrate , advice like yours would be blasted out of it.

Advice should be to benefit the op, not to temporarily make them feel good nor justify their actions when their actions are unjustifiable.

And to support them when they are.

[love1985]

Nope. Nothing the OP has said makes her a narcissist. She obviously liked him and maybe still does, she cut him off because she had to (due to him being an a$$) not because she wanted to. Maybe she still wishes things would work out between them, and is struggling to decide whether to do something that may or may not blow up in her face. It's not a great position to be in, and putting her down and calling her names won't help one bit.

 

Thank you for your civilized response. He clearly has nothing else to do but you hit it right in the head. Please don't argue with him. The point was to help me, you did and I appreciate it. He has nothing else better to do or say.

[love1985]

The Irony is that the OP came here looking for advice from non qualified professionals such as you and me.

Yet you think your advice is above mine. Why is that? "Chasing hope"?

The OP had already decided she will not entertain the idea of a relationship with this guy, "complains" about his contact yet leaves avenues open for his contact.

Try explain that if you are so expert on giving life advice.

If this post was on the relationship forum that i administrate , advice like yours would be blasted out of it.

Advice should be to benefit the op, not to temporarily make them feel good nor justify their actions when their actions are unjustifiable.

And to support them when they are.

 

Please find something else to comment on. You're not helpful nor clearly have a life. Agree to disagree and move on.

[love1985]

This.

My definition of irony is people who spend an absurd amount of time on these boards yet think they are qualified to give "life" advice.

 

I agree with you 100%. I take the honest advice from people who are not hiding behind computers just to say something. Thanks for your observation. Please don't argue with him.

[Billie28]

I agree with you 100%. I take the honest advice from people who are not hiding behind computers just to say something. Thanks for your observation. Please don't argue with him.

 

I think what you meant to say was you take the advice you want to hear. The advice that justifies your thoughts. From the empathisers. Your friends are there for empathy. You should come here for objective unbiased advice. Sometimes that may sound harsh and hard to take on board.

If you want advice from people not hiding behind a computer screen , why then ask on a public forum where everyone is anonymous?

[love1985]

I think what you meant to say was you take the advice you want to hear. The advice that justifies your thoughts. From the empathisers. Your friends are there for empathy. You should come here for objective unbiased advice. Sometimes that may sound harsh and hard to take on board.

If you want advice from people not hiding behind a computer screen , why then ask on a public forum where everyone is anonymous?

 

Child, please go about your business.

[Billie28]

Typical narcissistic response.

[j.man]

Fragile ego, sense of entitlement, dishes out insults... TROUBLING SYMPTOMS.

[love1985]

Fragile ego, sense of entitlement, dishes out insults... TROUBLING SYMPTOMS.

 

Lord please find another post. I've respected your feedback but what I won't tolerate are the insults you bring. You're only making yourself look bad. Please stop commenting. Thank you.

[Billie28]

Lord please find another post. I've respected your feedback but what I won't tolerate are the insults you bring. You're only making yourself look bad. Please stop commenting. Thank you.

 

J.man is a regular on here. He gives very good objective and unbiased advice. Your reaction again is typical of a narcissist.

You welcome attention be it positive or negative. You just want attention.

You insult others to engage contact when you realise that is the only way to get it.

You allow for some guy to contact you via instagram and then post about not wanting his contact when a simple block would prevent it.

But I think both myself and j.man should probably stop enabling your narcissim.

I hope you can get past your anger and seek professional help.

[love1985]

J.man is a regular on here. He gives very good objective and unbiased advice. Your reaction again is typical of a narcissist.

You welcome attention be it positive or negative. You just want attention.

You insult others to engage contact when you realise that is the only way to get it.

You allow for some guy to contact you via instagram and then post about not wanting his contact when a simple block would prevent it.

But I think both myself and j.man should probably stop enabling your narcissim.

I hope you can get past your anger and seek professional help.

 

Have a good day sir.

[Billie28]

I'm not a "sir"

[ChasingHope]

J.man is a regular on here. He gives very good objective and unbiased advice. Your reaction again is typical of a narcissist.

You welcome attention be it positive or negative. You just want attention.

You insult others to engage contact when you realise that is the only way to get it.

You allow for some guy to contact you via instagram and then post about not wanting his contact when a simple block would prevent it.

But I think both myself and j.man should probably stop enabling your narcissim.

I hope you can get past your anger and seek professional help.

 

Oh, Billie, you make me laugh...but certainly not with you.

 

The fact that you belittle, insult, judge, label, and name call under a guise of offering constructive advice leads me to believe that your life outside of this forum is so unbearable that you find solace in in trying to make others feel as lousy as you do. I feel quite sad for you.

[Hermes]

ChasingHope.

 

I can assure you that if Billie, J.Man, me, or anyone else were considered out of line on here the moderators would be on to them.

Some people are more direct than others, and truth to tell the direct line is the best. Being direct does not mean being insulting.

[ChasingHope]

ChasingHope.

 

I can assure you that if Billie, J.Man, me, or anyone else were considered out of line on here the moderators would be on to them.

Some people are more direct than others, and truth to tell the direct line is the best. Being direct does not mean being insulting.

 

I think you and the posters you referenced have spent such an extensive period time on these boards that you have perfected knowing how far you go with what you call "direct" comments that you come just shy of derogatory but still aggressively attempting to make someone feel worse than they all ready do.

[Hermes]

You go right ahead and put in a complaint Chasing.

 

Extensive period? I think not. I haven't been here until recently for about six months.....

[Billie28]

I think you and the posters you referenced have spent such an extensive period time on these boards that you have perfected knowing how far you go with what you call "direct" comments that you come just shy of derogatory but still aggressively attempting to make someone feel worse than they all ready do.

 

If you look at my profile and posts, you will see that my approach in my advice differs depending on who I am talking to.

There is a good and valid reason for this.

Sometimes a very direct and blunt approach is the only way to get a point across and usually directed to those who show little insight.

To give advice and to hope the person seeking it receives it and for it to help, is not only to have an opinion (everyone has an opinion) but to be able to read between the lines and understand where the op is coming from.

Try to learn from others posts that this kind of approach and advice is not a personal attack but actually in the op's interest and you might become less defensive on the advice you receive on your own threads which I have noticed is your typical manner of responding.

[ChasingHope]

If you look at my profile and posts, you will see that my approach in my advice differs depending on who I am talking to.

There is a good and valid reason for this.

Sometimes a very direct and blunt approach is the only way to get a point across and usually directed to those who show little insight.

To give advice and to hope the person seeking it receives it and for it to help, is not only to have an opinion (everyone has an opinion) but to be able to read between the lines and understand where the op is coming from.

Try to learn from others posts that this kind of approach and advice is not a personal attack but actually in the op's interest and you might become less defensive on the advice you receive on your own threads which I have noticed is your typical manner of responding.

 

I really feel you would benefit from using all of this free time that you have to be on here posting and visit with a professional. You might find some insight as to why you come on here and project your misery onto others.

[ChasingHope]

You go right ahead and put in a complaint Chasing.

 

Extensive period? I think not. I haven't been here until recently for about six months.....

 

I don't need to complain. I find no value in your advice.

[Ms Darcy]

Nope. Nothing the OP has said makes her a narcissist. She obviously liked him and maybe still does, she cut him off because she had to (due to him being an a$$) not because she wanted to. Maybe she still wishes things would work out between them, and is struggling to decide whether to do something that may or may not blow up in her face. It's not a great position to be in, and putting her down and calling her names won't help one bit.

 

I agree. OP - I think you should just trust that moving on from him was the right thing to do.

 

I also think it benefits no one for the term "narcissist" to be thrown around like it's candy.

 

I just don't think the guy is interested and that is wasting your time.

[j.man]

Oh, Billie, you make me laugh...but certainly not with you.

 

The fact that you belittle, insult, judge, label, and name call under a guise of offering constructive advice leads me to believe that your life outside of this forum is so unbearable that you find solace in in trying to make others feel as lousy as you do. I feel quite sad for you.

ChasingHope:

 

Posts: 548

Thanks: 29

Ratio: 5%

 

j.man aka "The Champ":

 

Posts: 3449

Thanks: 2455

Ratio: 71%

^ That doesn't even include the tens of thousands of hearts I've touched prior to the "thank" function.

 

It crushes me that ChasingHope doesn't value my advice, but the show must go on.