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What helped you feel better today?

Cynder

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Cynder Grand Master

Cynder

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Travel. On my spring break so been to Yakushima and now in Kagoshima. It has been a year since the break up and I have done some amazing trips during that time that wouldnt have been possible if I was still in a relationship.

 

Take advantage of your newfound independence as you never know when it might end. It might still hurt but doing things that you love, in my case travelling, gives you such a boost!

 

 

I'm considering taking a cross country Amtrak trip this summer.

 

I have always wanted to do a cross country road trip. But since I can't drive Amtrak is the best alternative. Plus I love train travel. I've been to Europe multiple times and I don't know why, but I really like train stations and just being on a train. It's fun.

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rich46 Community Regular

rich46

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I'm considering taking a cross country Amtrak trip this summer.

 

I have always wanted to do a cross country road trip. But since I can't drive Amtrak is the best alternative. Plus I love train travel. I've been to Europe multiple times and I don't know why, but I really like train stations and just being on a train. It's fun.

Go for it!

 

My next jaunt after this is a road trip around Iceland this summer holiday. Iceland has been top of my list for a while and nothing/nobody preventing me from going now

 

In terms of this thread, even just 'planning' future travel makes me feel better. Makes you realise the opportunities you now have, and it switches your attention forward rather than back.

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Cynder Grand Master

Cynder

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Go for it!

 

My next jaunt after this is a road trip around Iceland this summer holiday. Iceland has been top of my list for a while and nothing/nobody preventing me from going now

 

In terms of this thread, even just 'planning' future travel makes me feel better. Makes you realise the opportunities you now have, and it switches your attention forward rather than back.

 

Iceland is on my bucket list too. That's a place I will go one day.

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Cynder Grand Master

Cynder

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The couple I car pool with to work have been together for a while, and all they do is fight. Today the whole way to work they fought about KFC. He was driving almost 80 mph the whole way to work, and they were snapping at each other. Her and I were walking in the building and he was parking the car. She was telling me he's mad because she went to KFC before work and they didn't have time to eat the food at home before leaving.

 

I know it probably sounds mean... but this made me feel better today. I was thinking, well, I'm single now so I don't have to worry about any of this childish crap.

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strongemily Apprentice

strongemily

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Fantasizing about other people. Yea, this may be unhealthy... but it helped me realize I could possibly be with someone else down the road. Like maybe it's not all over for me.

 

Lol, I do not think that is necessarily unhealthy. I think it can be comforting to imagine yourself in a relationship, even if you are not ready for it. Of course it is not all over for you! You don't need to be in a relationship with someone to tell you that. You can achieve anything you want on your own because you're awesome.

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strongemily Apprentice

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I had a tough day at work today, kept getting anxiety every time I was walking around the building I worked in because I was thinking I could run into him at any moment. Didn't happen, which is for the best. But it was more painful dealing with this today than yesterday. I took several breaks to find a spot where I could be alone and meditate and write my thoughts down, and I think it did help but it did not completely fix me.

 

Then, I went for a run with a bunch of friends and I felt a little better but still not great. I even sat in my car completely lost for a minute afterwards. Then, when I got home, I somehow decided to work on a table I'm trying to refinish, and I got so much done with it and felt awesome! Then I did a lot to clean out my garage and laundry room. Feeling good now!

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Cynder Grand Master

Cynder

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I've been watching guided meditations on YouTube for letting go of your ex. Is this counter productive if it floods your mind with memories of her?

 

I tried that... it didn't help for that exact reason.

 

Non guided meditation helps me a lot more.

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janut1 Proficient

janut1

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Having lunch with a friend. It was healing to talk to her about what happened and how I was feeling. She knew I had doubts during the relationship and pretty much confirmed that I made the right decision. She told me, you are going to be okay! That felt good.

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rich46 Community Regular

rich46

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Did a couple of April Fools jokes on my two older brothers via whatsapp. Barely believable scenarios, but they were gullible enough to fall for them haha. Thankfully they saw the funny side

 

I also wrote a journal about my recent trip to Yakushima and will put it online tomorrow with all my other travel stories. I love writing anyway, and this just made me relive and reinforce all the amazing memories I made on the trip.

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Cynder Grand Master

Cynder

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I spent a good chunk of my day in my studio painting and getting ready for this big show coming up. Then I went and had lunch with a friend.

 

After he left I painted for a few hours, and then went for my run. I am having to take fewer stops on my route to catch my breath. When I first started running I had to take four stops all through my route. Now I only have to take two.

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boltnrun Grand Master

boltnrun

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Yes, for medical reasons. I can't run or play sports, so the best I can do is walk or very low impact aerobics. I can also do treadmill or exercise or regular bike.

 

But I still get that great feeling from exercising even if I can't get the endorphins from running.

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rich46 Community Regular

rich46

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Reading "The Chimp Paradox" by Dr. Steve Peters.

 

This book has becoming very popular in the UK in recent years, and Steve Peters has worked with so many top athletes on the psychological side of sport.

 

His model is very simplified, but it really helps me to understand what is going on in my head. I need to stick with this book and keep reading it, as it always gives me clarity and helps me deal with situations better, but only-short term until I slip into old habits. I want to give a part of my evening each day to reading a segment of it, and doing the exercises, to help reinforce his methods and ideas.

 

I recommend it

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rich46 Community Regular

rich46

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I go back to work/school tomorrow for a new school year. This exact day one year ago was when she disappeared on me, leading to a sleepless night and a horrible first day back at school trying to put on a fake show for the staff/children.

 

Today, I have felt better by reflecting on what I have achieved in the last 12 months, most notably in terms of finishing my Masters and doing lots of travelling, something that gives me the most happiness. Trips to Korea, Taiwan, England, New Zealand, Yakushima would not have happened if I had felt compelled to stay here because of the limitations that my relationship brought. I've also socialised a lot more than I have ever done, and made new friends as a result.

 

I am not where I want to be as a person yet, but the break up has no doubt made me stronger and taught me a lot.

 

So yeah, reflecting has made me feel better today

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