Gf smokes pot, she doesn't know I know, what do I do?

[greta96]

Alcohol is a drug, and it's the most deadly drug in the United States, far more so than marijuana, cocaine, and heroine combined, even in terms of proportionate usage.

 

How in the world is alcohol not a drug? I have a lot of friends in pharmacology and drug counseling who would love to hear the support for your thesis.

 

For the record, I don't smoke pot but I do drink alcohol. I just don't pretend my drug use carries some sort of moral superiority.

 

Moral superiority?? If I'm not mistaken I was just referring to MY PERSONAL DEAL BREAKERS in my first reply to the OP, I wasn't saying I was better or wiser or whatever you want to call me just because I don't do drugs. I thought I said clearly that whatever people choose to do is up to them, but that we are all entitled to our own values and deal breakers. I am solely talking about myself. And OP's problem wasn't alcohol it was pot. Why in the world are we bringing alcohol into discussion? The post was about POT.

[j.man]

No one is arguing if pot is a drug. I'm arguing that it's not her "problem."

 

And I haven't smoked pot or done any other non-prescription drugs in a few years

I'm sure prescribed opioids and benzos make the exceptions list, too.

[DoF]

OMG I can't believe I need to argue whether pot is a drug or not! Of course it's a drug, and it messes with brain chemistry and changes personalities.

Caffeine and alcohol aren't good in excess either, but they are not drugs.

I see this post makes it pretty easy to tell which ones of you are pot smokers lol.

 

Wow, at 38, you should know this stuff.

 

Of course alcohol is a drug, so is Caffeine.......hello.

[j.man]

Moral superiority?? If I'm not mistaken I was just referring to MY PERSONAL DEAL BREAKERS in my first reply to the OP, I wasn't saying I was better or wiser or whatever you want to call me just because I don't do drugs. I thought I said clearly that whatever people choose to do is up to them, but that we are all entitled to our own values and deal breakers. I am solely talking about myself. And OP's problem wasn't alcohol it was pot. Why in the world are we bringing alcohol into discussion? The post was about POT.

When you dictate what someone else's problems are, that's no longer "MY PERSONAL DEAL BREAKERS," that's you transposing your values onto others, and in a rather judgmental way at that. And judgmental itself is fine. It's when someone hypocritically engages in their own drug use while chiding the recreational drug use of someone else that it's something to be called out for.

[faraday]

When you dictate what someone else's problems are, that's no longer "MY PERSONAL DEAL BREAKERS," that's you transposing your values onto others, and in a rather judgmental way at that. And judgmental itself is fine. It's when someone hypocritically engages in their own drug use while chiding the recreational drug use of someone else that it's something to be called out for.

 

Word.

 

....

[DoF]

I'm sure prescribed opioids and benzos make the exceptions list, too.

 

They are legal, so it's ok.

 

Funny cause where I live we have an epidemic of kids doing LEGAL HEROIN....that they obtain from a pharmacy.

 

I think people need to really learn that LEGAL or ILLEGAL has absolutely 0 effect on MORALS. Slavery used to be legal.......heck women couldn't even vote........just because it was LEGAL doesn't mean it was RIGHT.

 

Also, let's not forget DRUGS (illegal drugs) are a HUGE business in this country. We already know what happened in countries like Portugal or Switzerland when they legalized the drugs....problems went away.

 

This will not happen here, mostly due to income that drugs provide to our criminal, security, prison and police forces.

[greta96]

When you dictate what someone else's problems are, that's no longer "MY PERSONAL DEAL BREAKERS," that's you transposing your values onto others, and in a rather judgmental way at that. And judgmental itself is fine. It's when someone hypocritically engages in their own drug use while chiding the recreational drug use of someone else that it's something to be called out for.

 

 

Lol...yeah you got me, my name is Greta and I'm an alcoholic. How hypocritical of me to be against pot!

LMAO...

[greta96]

Wow, at 38, you should know this stuff.

 

Of course alcohol is a drug, so is Caffeine.......hello.

 

Could you please show me where I said those 2 were NOT drugs? I said they are not good *in excess*. A glass of wine isn't bad. A cup of coffee a day isn't bad. I only said the object of this thread was pot and not anything else.

[dias]

Maybe you could consider alcohol as a drug but caffeine ? This is ludicrous .

[faraday]

Quoted wrong post. I'll try again lol

[faraday]

Maybe you could consider alcohol as a drug but caffeine ? This is ludicrous .

 

]

[j.man]

They are legal, so it's ok.

 

Funny cause where I live we have an epidemic of kids doing LEGAL HEROIN....that they obtain from a pharmacy.

 

I think people need to really learn that LEGAL or ILLEGAL has absolutely 0 effect on MORALS. Slavery used to be legal.......heck women couldn't even vote........just because it was LEGAL doesn't mean it was RIGHT.

 

Also, let's not forget DRUGS (illegal drugs) are a HUGE business in this country. We already know what happened in countries like Portugal or Switzerland when they legalized the drugs....problems went away.

 

This will not happen here, mostly due to income that drugs provide to our criminal, security, prison and police forces.

It's not every day I agree with a DoF post, but this one is money.

[faraday]

I don't let my 7 year old have caffeine. She can have it when she's old enough to regulate her own sleeping- like I don't have to wake her up for school/work or ask her to go to bed. Probably when she's 13 or 14. We'll see.

 

 

That's also probably when I'll let her have wine with dinner (if she wants it). I don't want her first experiences with alcohol to be unsupervised with friends. My dad thinks that's crazy. To each their own.

[dias]

Do caffeine consumption and pot consumption have the same side effects ? Come on...that's common sense.

[j.man]

Do caffeine consumption and pot consumption have the same side effects ? Come on...that's common sense.

They don't, you're right. Caffeine consumption carries with it a much higher rate of chemical dependence and, unlike marijuana, incurs actual physical withdrawal symptoms.

[DoF]

Could you please show me where I said those 2 were NOT drugs?

 

Sure, here you go.

 

Caffeine and alcohol aren't good in excess either, but they are not drugs.

 

 

I said they are not good *in excess*. A glass of wine isn't bad. A cup of coffee a day isn't bad. I only said the object of this thread was pot and not anything else.

 

NOTHING is good when taken to the extreme.

 

I'm telling you, hit of weed a day isn't bad either.

[greta96]

NOTHING is good when taken to the extreme.

.

 

Agree with this.

As for the other thing, I don't know. I guess I'll have to try and report back. Lol

[jimthzz]

When you dictate what someone else's problems are, that's no longer "MY PERSONAL DEAL BREAKERS," that's you transposing your values onto others, and in a rather judgmental way at that. And judgmental itself is fine. It's when someone hypocritically engages in their own drug use while chiding the recreational drug use of someone else that it's something to be called out for.

 

The post is not specifically about the man's GF's chosen recreational drug. The beef is with her hiding that she uses pot, an illegal substance in many places and something that makes him uncomfortable. If he had known earlier on, then maybe he would not be having such a hard time with it. The OP is emotionally bonded to this person now in a way he wasn't earlier on.

 

Personally, having survived the 70s era pot smoking, I vote for extricating himself from this relationship and only dating non-potsmokers if it makes you uncomfortable to be around drug use.

[j.man]

The post is not specifically about the man's GF's chosen recreational drug. The beef is with her hiding that she uses pot, an illegal substance in many places and something that makes him uncomfortable. If he had known earlier on, then maybe he would not be having such a hard time with it. The OP is emotionally bonded to this person now in a way he wasn't earlier on.

 

Personally, having survived the 70s era pot smoking, I vote for extricating himself from this relationship and only dating non-potsmokers if it makes you uncomfortable to be around drug use.

Follow the context. You and I are in agreement.

[jimthzz]

The post is not specifically about the man's GF's chosen recreational drug. The beef is with her hiding that she uses pot, an illegal substance in many places and something that makes him uncomfortable. If he had known earlier on, then maybe he would not be having such a hard time with it. The OP is emotionally bonded to this person now in a way he wasn't earlier on.

 

Personally, having survived the 70s era pot smoking, I vote for extricating himself from this relationship and only dating non-potsmokers if it makes you uncomfortable to be around drug use.

 

Mostly, but I also do not think it hypocritical to be anti pot smoking and still drink alcohol. One is illegal, the other is not.

 

Follow the context. You and I are in agreement.

[rosephase]

OP, clearly you've hit a nerve about drugs. But I don't think that is your issue. Your issue is your dating someone who will lie about who she is to get you to like her more. That is a pretty normal thing to do when you are young and just figuring out relationships. You are loud and vocal about your view points (they clearly mean a lot to you... even you masculinity is tied up in them... I don't think that is super healthy and it's probably something it would be worth working on in yourself) and she will agree with them. You said in your post that you guys share all the same values but the truth is you don't know what values she has because you have been so clear about yours and she's just been going along because she likes you. That isn't a relationship and you don't really know her. That is an issue.

 

That knee jerk reaction to need to do harder drugs to be the MAN in your relationship is going to bite you in the butt. You need to do some work on your comfort with yourself. If the only way you can feel masculine is to be around people and date people who have done less exploring than you, you are going to quickly run out of people to hang out with. If you are going to make choices like abstaining from all drugs (or all things you think of as drugs) get comfortable with that. Find a way to feel secure in your choices.

[greta96]

They don't, you're right. Caffeine consumption carries with it a much higher rate of chemical dependence and, unlike marijuana, incurs actual physical withdrawal symptoms.

 

I suppose you have never seen a person in withdrawal from marijuana addiction, otherwise you wouldn't say this. You have never seen the uncontrollable shaking and convulsions, the complete meltdown and everything else that comes with marijuana withdrawal... It's not pretty, or pleasant for them. Believe me. Once it's all said and done, they wish they never started. I wish I could post a few statements from people who went through it, but obviously I can't, for the sake of their privacy.

[BlarneyStone]

Wow, this thread derailed hard.

[DoF]

Mostly, but I also do not think it hypocritical to be anti pot smoking and still drink alcohol. One is illegal, the other is not.

 

So 150 years ago you would have a slave too right? Cause it was legal.

 

You would hit your woman over the head with the broomstick?

 

 

 

Do you even know why it's illegal?

[HeartGoesOn]

Mod Note: Please stay on topic and focus on the OP's question, rather than debating the legality of the issue at hand.