mindu Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 I´ve known him for almost 4 years now, but we stopped dating about 3 years ago. We dated exclusively for 9 months, although never an official couple, because he wasn´t ready. That ofcours made me act like a damned fool sometimes. The dating ended due to a drunken night, that led him to believe I lied to him about my whereabouts and kissing another guy. After that I tried to get him back for a long time, and he tried to be my friend and to rebuild some trust, but the friendship was always too flirty to be just a friendship for me, so I pulled back several times. Finally we have had a very open talk about everything - so many things from the past was covered, and the talk ended with me taking some time to think about, what were to happen now. ... But when I started thinking about it, I didn´t know if he wants to see me as a friend - again! Flirty friendship! Or as something more. I spoke with him with the attempt tp try and find out, what matters to him, and how he is like with his other female friends. He said, that he´s just like this with me, that it´s soecial with me and him. What´s weird to me is: why does he want to keep this up? We´re never having sex, kissing or anything, it´s just a little more. And I don´t feel like I´m giving him an egoboost or being kept on the backburner. I just do what I feel like, and after him leaving me and rejecting me, I have just been on my own, because it seems like love is just not my scene. All it´s ever brought me is pain. He haven´t been with anyone either in these past 3 years, so he´s not a player. I asked him still about, what was up with liking pics of girls a lot when we were supposed to be dating, and that that was an example of how dating him was very confusing for me. He said, that he wanted to explain that face to face and not on the phone, and made a joke, that he though he was paranoid, but compaired to me...!!!!! I said, I didn´t want to be a about it, to which he replied, that it was cool and "let´s get it all out there" - he has been rejecting me for so long, so I don´t understand why he wants to go through all of this with me and why he wants to maintain this special bond. The way I see it, it can´t go on - it has to either evolve or stop, if there is to be any hope for us finding love either together or with other people. Haven´t had the chance to talk to him again ´cause we´re both busy, but what gives?! Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 After reading your previous threads, it appears this is the same guy from last December. Why, after all this time are you still hanging on, and contemplating being friends? Link to comment
JustWishing Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 Stay away from him and move on. Love shouldn't be so complicated!!! Link to comment
SooSad33 Posted October 17, 2015 Share Posted October 17, 2015 "The way I see it, it can´t go on - it has to either evolve or stop" - Tell HIM this. Im sure it's probably affecting you emotionally.... So, You don't need to be continously led on anymore. If you can't handle being a 'friend' with the guy. is probably best to ignore and move on with your life. Link to comment
mindu Posted October 17, 2015 Author Share Posted October 17, 2015 Ah, I feel you are not really getting, where I´m coming from. I am not asking what to do. At all. Taking advice online has turned out to not do anything good for me. I´m just asking for some insight into, what could be going on with him, but again: online community just doesn´t comprehend, that I am not in any ways asking, if I should chase him or get out of the friendship or whatever.... Thanks for the replies anyways... Link to comment
mindu Posted October 17, 2015 Author Share Posted October 17, 2015 Is it possible for me to delete my account? Link to comment
mindu Posted October 17, 2015 Author Share Posted October 17, 2015 "The way I see it, it can´t go on - it has to either evolve or stop" - Tell HIM this. Im sure it's probably affecting you emotionally.... So, You don't need to be continously led on anymore. If you can't handle being a 'friend' with the guy. is probably best to ignore and move on with your life. Exactly what I was going to do anyways. But again: what is going on with him? Link to comment
mhowe Posted October 17, 2015 Share Posted October 17, 2015 I am not sure the whether what I say will be insight or advice, but here goes.... Nothing is going on with him. You are a harmless habit to him. He puts in no real effort and you pay attention to him. Link to comment
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