SooSad33 Posted November 29, 2014 Share Posted November 29, 2014 "But there's problems,we get on fantastic except for my jealousy and trust issues! It started out wen he lied to me about something at the start and I find it hard to believe him so I pick and pick! " - Yes, this is a big problem. No trust? Not good. ( But you have reasons for it). "The problem is he's not coming back I think" - This is not a problem, I think. sorry. Not sure how long you've been together, but this is some heavy issue and causing way too much crap! Leave him sitting in his tears. Too much drama. Link to comment
SooSad33 Posted November 29, 2014 Share Posted November 29, 2014 Yes I totally agree with you,you speak perfect sense and it's exactly what I would advise another but my hearts broke,sleepless nights,Iv not ate in four days. I miss him! He was my best friend and I feel abandoned and I'm here on my own in our bed thinking he's off up to God knows what and doesnt give a toss! That's the killer,I want him to admit it and tell me why Guess it's too much to ask for Don't expect these answers. You know what he does. Now, its time to take care of YOU, your hurts and your child. It'll take much time to work on healing from the man he is.. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted November 29, 2014 Share Posted November 29, 2014 He's still saying I'm crazy,won't discuss the prostitute or the number but mentions how he feels unloved because I doubt him..porn,prostitutes? No! Gone gone gone. Trying to flip it like you're the crazy one. Where is the love in that? Grrr. Do not bother trying to discuss this any further. Thank your lucky stars you found out now. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted November 29, 2014 Share Posted November 29, 2014 No! Gone gone gone. Trying to flip it like you're the crazy one. Where is the love in that? Grrr. Do not bother trying to discuss this any further. Thank your lucky stars you found out now. Goodness.I meant to say, do not both to discuss it with him... we are safe territory! Hope tonight is going okay. It can get a little chaotic at night after kids go to bed. Link to comment
Sue800 Posted November 29, 2014 Author Share Posted November 29, 2014 Goodness.I meant to say, do not both to discuss it with him... we are safe territory! Hope tonight is going okay. It can get a little chaotic at night after kids go to bed. Yes it's when one thinks the most,when the house is quiet.though I can be in a crowded room and its still going round and round in my head. It's so wrong and I didn't want nor need this. I'm trying to not contact him now,I need answers and he's not giving them so I need to pull away Link to comment
Sue800 Posted November 29, 2014 Author Share Posted November 29, 2014 Goodness.I meant to say, do not both to discuss it with him... we are safe territory! Hope tonight is going okay. It can get a little chaotic at night after kids go to bed. Don't expect these answers. You know what he does. Now, its time to take care of YOU, your hurts and your child. It'll take much time to work on healing from the man he is.. True and I'll try even though it's killing me and I'll never understand what happened the wonderful decent guy I thought he was. I am trying soo hard,writing this thread was step 1. I WILL succeed Link to comment
Sue800 Posted November 29, 2014 Author Share Posted November 29, 2014 Goodness.I meant to say, do not both to discuss it with him... we are safe territory!m Hope tonight is going okay. It can get a little chaotic at night after kids go to bed. "But there's problems,we get on fantastic except for my jealousy and trust issues! It started out wen he lied to me about something at the start and I find it hard to believe him so I pick and pick! " - Yes, this is a big problem. No trust? Not good. ( But you have reasons for it). "The problem is he's not coming back I think" - This is not a problem, I think. sorry. Not sure how long you've been together, but this is some heavy issue and causing way too much crap! Leave him sitting in his tears. Too much drama. I doubt he's sitting in tears,Iv a funny feeling he's doing fine! I never knew this man at all,seems it's all an act!! Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted November 29, 2014 Share Posted November 29, 2014 I am going to try... 1. He loved you, at least, as he best knows how or is willing enough to believe in. 2. If the sex doesn't mean anything, is it wrong? So, I'm still a good guy, right? 3. She's coming after me. Just stick to the lie, stick to the lie... Looking backwards won't teach you what I thought it would,unless you are looking back only to choose examples to explain my own situ. Link to comment
Sue800 Posted November 29, 2014 Author Share Posted November 29, 2014 I am going to try... 1. He loved you, at least, as he best knows how or is willing enough to believe in. 2. If the sex doesn't mean anything, is it wrong? So, I'm still a good guy, right? 3. She's coming after me. Just stick to the lie, stick to the lie... Looking backwards won't teach you what I thought it would,unless you are looking back only to choose examples to explain my own situ. We met up today,had a talk and he's still saying he never cheated on me ever,and I tend to believe this for some reason. However the proof of him ringing this prodtitute is there and he saying it didn't happen,he's saying he never met a prostitute but he still rang her nine bloody times!!! Seems she didn't answer but I don't care if she didn't,the intent was there,he says he remembers calling a number but passed out in a drunken sleep. I left the conversation with him in tears as I told him I'm done and I could never b with a man who even thought of betraying me! I'm now ignoring his calls and texts. Don't know where to go from here Link to comment
faraday Posted November 29, 2014 Share Posted November 29, 2014 You block him Or in 4 days when you're not as mad, you'll miss him and he'll call, and you'll accept his explanation and take him back. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted November 29, 2014 Share Posted November 29, 2014 Ok, done. It's clear you've gone as far as you can go with him. Look forward. Make a plan and start to envision your plan, it will give you something to look forward to. Begin to think about relationship dynamics and see if there are any themes that point to something within yourself that you want to address. That becomes part of your plan, because it will help you see that being with him was bringing out the average in you, not the exceptional. Go be exceptional. BTW apologies for the mixed up pronouns at end of my last post. Guess I was falling asleep. Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted November 30, 2014 Share Posted November 30, 2014 Definitely be done with him. With his proclivity towards younger females, you should be very concerned about his behavior (future) with your teen girls. I'd also suggest you get yourself some serious help. Link to comment
Sue800 Posted November 30, 2014 Author Share Posted November 30, 2014 Yes it's when one thinks the most,when the house is quiet.though I can be in a crowded room and its still going round and round in my head. It's so wrong and I didn't want nor need this. I'm trying to not contact him now,I need answers and he's not giving them so I need to pull away Definitely be done with him. With his proclivity towards younger females, you should be very concerned about his behavior (future) with your teen girls. I'd also suggest you get yourself some serious help. Get myself some serious help for what exactly? Link to comment
bulletproof Posted December 1, 2014 Share Posted December 1, 2014 Get myself some serious help for what exactly? Well, for one, get some help dealing with the actual breakup. You said you can't eat, sleep, etc. and that you're basically falling apart. While it's normal to be upset about a breakup, this is definitely extreme, and it can't be good for your kids to see you this upset. I would also say that you should get help for hitting him. While you may think it's an isolated incident, it's not typical, and could indicate an anger problem. Finally, look at the title of the thread: he cheated with a hooker but you want him back. You can't feel that great about yourself if you want back a guy who has been soliciting hookers. Therapy could help with your self-esteem as well as the other issues. Link to comment
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