Hi everyone, how are we doing this weekend?

[sonicfan287]

Hey guys,

 

I'm aware that this can be a rough time of the year for most healers, myself included and I wanted to see how we're doing, most of us, as we just try to relax for this summer, and what will hopefully be a fun 4th of July and continue to go on with our lives. Its been very hard for myself, but you may have noticed I haven't been on too often, aside from a couple posts here and there. It doesn't mean I've stopped caring though and I've loved the time that I've spent on this board here, whether to give advice or just to vent on the incredible sadness and anger thats been on and off in my life since March 2012.

 

But how are some of you others? Are there new broken hearts on the board? I dread to see it but I'm not surprised when it happens... I've been good myself for the most part but starting to feel like things are moving too fast again... I just need to slow down and refocus and hopefully on this Saturday afternoon, many of us are taking time to do the same thing. Whatever stressful thing awaits you on Monday will still be there then, so if you haven't already (And you live in a locale with nice weather) you should get out and enjoy the weather, go to the beach, or just stay at home and work on your garden.

 

It seems with a change in seasons oftentimes comes a change in mood, sometimes positive or negative but it varies by person. Some people love the summer, whereas others are indifferent or don't like it, maybe find the heat annoying or don't like the beach or summer activities or are just winter people. I could go either way myself. Some summers have depressed me, while others have been a refreshing change of pace. The end of my spring went very well considering how it started (2 trips to the ER) and now that summer is upon us, I'm faced with an unfamiliar situation, kinda wondering how to fill some of this time. Sure, I'll keep up with what Ive been doing (maintaining 2 part time jobs and exercising frequently) but is there anything else I can add to give me some summer spirit? I went on a great hike last week but that was about the only summer thing I felt myself doing. Its so hard to find people these days but what are you going to do?

 

I'm just here to extend my outreach to all or even just to chat. I'm always on here (usually more than once daily) and will respond to any PM's or messages. God bless and enjoy your summer

[SouthernGirly]

Been a viewer/reader but just began posting....Broken Heart since April 8th, 2012.

[The_Seeker]

Well let's see. My ex broke up with me about month ago. I believe it was May 15ish or whatever. I got over it under 5 minutes. No need for much of a healing process. Heck I don't think I use much of a healing process a lot of people do on ENA. Anyway going on a tangent.

 

I moved on. After 2 weeks being signed onto POF and link removed, I found one guy I was very interested in. I canceled POF. LOL Since I found there are more quality guys on link removed in my area.

 

Currently dating a guy. On our date #2 yesterday. I had a lot of fun. So we'll see what happens next. Right now I'm focusing on having fun.

 

My weekend is going well. I'm beginning to learn about myself and getting to know myself more.

[SouthernGirly]

Interesting I met my ex on POF. I haven't really used dating sites yet I have always gotten email notifications for them. Just have no interest in exploring or getting to know anyone else. I'm not available but single.

[The_Seeker]

Interesting I met my ex on POF. I haven't really used dating sites yet I have always gotten email notifications for them. Just have no interest in exploring or getting to know anyone else. I'm not available but single.

 

Where I live, don't have much quality guys I'm looking for. If I switched to Match, a little bit more serious so that's what I like.

[pippy longstocking]

sonic that's a lovely post and nice to hear that your stronger and getting on with it ..

 

we don;t have the 4th july in blighty as you know , but hell , I am happy to raise a glass or two to you lot

 

I think the weather deffinately has an affect ..when we had that yellow ball thing in the sky ( which doesn;t happen too much over here) we where all moaning that we would be having bbq's and pub lunches and things with our exes and days out ...etc etc

 

now it has quite literally pissed it down for 3 weeks we are all moaning about that hahaha

 

 

yes there is a daily turn out from around the world of broken hearts and horror stories of what we seem capable of doing

to each other ...ahhhh ...kittens are so much easier ...

 

hey glad to see you x

[mpeer]

I was doing well 4 months post break up having just returned from a wonderful trip to Europe earlier this week. Today, I got hit with no motivation to go outside of my apartment even though the weather is lovely outside. Waking up this morning with a sad surreal feeling that he is no longer in my life in any capacity, but it was fleeting at best. Looking back 4 months ago, I have gone a long ways in healing, but not completely. I hope to reach indifference with nothing but fading memories of him soon.

[Lambert]

I was doing well 4 months post break up having just returned from a wonderful trip to Europe earlier this week. Today, I got hit with no motivation to go outside of my apartment even though the weather is lovely outside. Waking up this morning with a sad surreal feeling that he is no longer in my life in any capacity, but it was fleeting at best. Looking back 4 months ago, I have gone a long ways in healing, but not completely. I hope to reach indifference with nothing but fading memories of him soon.

 

I am with mpeer, sonic-- it's a beautiful day in my neck of the woods but I had no motivation to even put a chair out on the deck. But I did some chores around the house, so I am hanging in there. It's good to hear from you and to know you are hanging in there, too!

[sonicfan287]

Hey mpeer, (and Lambert as well)

 

I'm glad to hear you're hanging in there, and I'm at a similiar phase. Most of my weekend has been good so far but I had an intense phase of missing her which luckily has passed. They get further and further apart. To the Seeker, I'm glad you've been able to find new success in love and congratulate you on your quick recovery

[Scuza]

It's been going smoothly.

Started off going out of town with some friends for a big race, ended up running a huge personal best (WHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!).

 

Today, I decided to treat myself to an easy day of relaxation and TV, getting back at it tomorrow with running. Another race coming up this week, gotta get ready for it!

 

Don't slow down, folks, keep going strong!

[crashboombang]

I see nothing to look forward to at the moment.. this summer is turning out to be an unhappy series of anniversaries (this time last year I was chatting to him online and over the phone. and then the 2nd July we would have been together for a year), we had so much planned for this summer, doing work on the house, weekends away, etc.. All I see ahead of me is more misery... and dont even get me started on Christmas!!!

[einsteins_girl]

Ugh, feel like I'm back to the fixating stage a little this weekend. I'm approaching 5.5 months since the BU, almost to 1/2 a year. Ugh. Miss him and am irritated with him. I just can't figure out how to move on from this completely. How do you move on from a 6-year relationship that you thought might last forever? How do you cope with never hearing from the person again? I just... hate this. It's stupid.

[OneSadPuppy]

Ugh, feel like I'm back to the fixating stage a little this weekend. I'm approaching 5.5 months since the BU, almost to 1/2 a year. Ugh. Miss him and am irritated with him. I just can't figure out how to move on from this completely. How do you move on from a 6-year relationship that you thought might last forever? How do you cope with never hearing from the person again? I just... hate this. It's stupid.

 

When my marriage ended after 14 years, I took a year off before I started to start to get over it.

It does take time some time. Have you been forcing yourself to get out a bit?

Hiking, dinner, theater clubs? When I started to do that, then things started to fall back into place for me.

 

I've not really been too active after this last BU, but I'm close.

 

I would be much more depressed than I am now had I not gone through so much before and know what to expect.

Each time I swear I'll never fall in love again ... but I will!

 

Force yourself out!

 

OSP

[einsteins_girl]

Thanks, OSP. It doesn't help that this was my first boyfriend and first breakup, so this is literally the first time I've experienced any of this. (And I'm in my early 30s, so it's not like I'm a young 'un either.) I have been trying to stay busy, but I also have a driving phobia (I have a thread on eNA about it), which makes it hard for me to really get out and about. Plus, I don't have many friends. I just tend to have a few very close friends, and I can't take up all of their time. I'm doing my best though. This is just very, very hard. He was my person.

[mg22]

Ugh, feel like I'm back to the fixating stage a little this weekend. I'm approaching 5.5 months since the BU, almost to 1/2 a year. Ugh. Miss him and am irritated with him. I just can't figure out how to move on from this completely. How do you move on from a 6-year relationship that you thought might last forever? How do you cope with never hearing from the person again? I just... hate this. It's stupid.

 

I feel the same way ! while mine ended 11 months ago i still have tons of hurt. He's happy and moved on with the women he dumped me for. All i can picture is them having a lovey , lovey time , they are probably so happy in love it makes me SICK !

[einsteins_girl]

Just had a breakdown after leaving the gym. Sat in my car, crying, then tried to pull myself together enough to drive home. Got home and started crying again. Can't believe I'll never see his face, hear his voice, hold his hand, kiss him, snuggle with him. I can't believe it's all gone. I'm dying to contact him, just to know he's out there. I won't. I'm fighting the urge with everything I have. But I just don't want him to be gone forever. It all went by so fast. I wish I had valued the little moments more. I wish I had tried harder. I wish I had been better, stronger. I know it's not all my fault, but I wish, I wish, I wish it could've been different.

[OneSadPuppy]

Just had a breakdown after leaving the gym. Sat in my car, crying, then tried to pull myself together enough to drive home. Got home and started crying again. Can't believe I'll never see his face, hear his voice, hold his hand, kiss him, snuggle with him. I can't believe it's all gone. I'm dying to contact him, just to know he's out there. I won't. I'm fighting the urge with everything I have. But I just don't want him to be gone forever. It all went by so fast. I wish I had valued the little moments more. I wish I had tried harder. I wish I had been better, stronger. I know it's not all my fault, but I wish, I wish, I wish it could've been different.

 

Oh dear, weekends are a monster in the beginning.

I remember the breakdowns.

No tears for me (since 11 years old, but that's another story), but I sure got some nasty anxiety.

Do you have someone to call?

 

I found watching a movie would sometimes help.

Nothing with romance mind you.

 

Don't blame yourself, you cannot change the past. Dwelling on it can only hurt you.

I to spent time wondering if I did this, or said this what might have been different.

The only thing I wish now was that I didn't blame myself so much when we split up.

She didn't deserve that power, and I didn't deserve to rip the last bit of dignity from myself.

 

I'm sorry EG, we're here for you!

 

OSP

[einsteins_girl]

Thanks, OSP. Sadly, the BU is not new. It's been 5 months. I had been doing relatively well. No breakdowns in a long time. But the 5-month mark, plus some other changes in my personal life lately, hit me hard. I feel like I've regressed about ten steps. Plus, NC is painful. I really thought he would've been in touch by now.

[OneSadPuppy]

Thanks, OSP. Sadly, the BU is not new. It's been 5 months. I had been doing relatively well. No breakdowns in a long time. But the 5-month mark, plus some other changes in my personal life lately, hit me hard. I feel like I've regressed about ten steps. Plus, NC is painful. I really thought he would've been in touch by now.

 

I know my ex wanted for us to be in touch, but just I would have to initiate it.

Same for me, but in reverse.

Fortunately for both of us, we both know the other is too classy, proud, stubborn (pick one) to ever break NC.

Still bugs me to talk about it.

But talk about it we must until the hurt has been repeated so many times, we're immune to it

It's awful that non-related life incidences can mess you up so much. Like hard times, or bad news.

My ex has been to two family funerals with me (one my Fathers, one my Uncles - both I MC'ed).

Uggh, you can imagine when I need support how I immediately want to reach in her direction.

 

I'm recovering from my last ex fairly quickly. I mean, we only went out for 8 months and never lived together. It's sad that I'm on week 10 and still feel pretty raw.

Now the ex wife of 14 years, I wallowed for a full year before I ever started to recover.

It takes time. But you'll get there. It sucks though. Sometimes I wonder if I'm better off being like another poster here and saying "never again".

But I know I can't. I'll fall in love again. Sigh.

 

OSP