mari2mila Posted February 9, 2012 Share Posted February 9, 2012 My daughter has a very difficult time with behavior in school. She is 6 1/2, sweet, smart, and a huge ball of fire! The problem is, her behavior is much different at school than it was at home. She was diagnosed with combined-type ADHD and ODD last year. I've done a lot on my end to change my behavior and reactions, and be more consistent at home, and I have very few issues with her behavior at home and out in public with me now. At school is another story all together. She's locked the sub out of the classroom, climbed up on her desk to grab something out of the teacher's hand, stolen, ran away, hid, refused to go with the class, ripped up class work, thrown away homework and behavior sheets, said mean things to others, etc. The list is pretty long. My question is, what can I do to get her to change her behavior in school? She's been earning rewards at home (pokemon cards, squinkies, and $.10 for each happy face on her daily sheet, as well as doing her reading time and completing her math/spelling. But, what else can I do to change her behavior in school? I've had many emails go back and forth with the teacher, but it's always like a venting session for her. Nothing ever changes. Conferences are the same way. We spend the whole time discussing behavior, rather than academics. I've also email the principal, and am awaiting a response. (just requested that we begin some sort of dialogue about this). What are your experiences? What's worked for you? I really want her to do well in school and be liked by the kids and teachers. But, I have a feeling that a big part of her success is going to be based on what I do for her, and not the school. Thanks in advance. Link to comment
Moontiger Posted February 9, 2012 Share Posted February 9, 2012 Mari, Didn't you post a very similar thread just a little while ago? I would read through that one. People gave you some very good advice there. The bottom line is your daughter and you need a lot of resources to help the situation. As the mother its your job to find those resources. Do a lot of research on her disorders, hire a behavioral specialist and/or child therapist, looking to the law (your daughter falls under the American's With Disabilities Act and thus has access to various forms of help). Link to comment
Seraphim Posted February 9, 2012 Share Posted February 9, 2012 Everyone has to be consistent with the consequences and rewards at home and at school. These kids learn cause an effect rather slowly. My son was the same. He has almost no school discipline issues since about grade 4 and he is now in grade 9. Since grade 4 the only issues he has had were provoked by others and that has been 2 or 3 times. Give her time and be consistent. Link to comment
mari2mila Posted February 9, 2012 Author Share Posted February 9, 2012 Didn't you post a very similar thread just a little while ago? I would read through that one. QUOTE] Yes, I did post a similar thread, but my question posed is quite different. Aside from requesting an IEP, reading, and researching, I'd like some opinions of those who've maybe had some success in this situation. It never hurts to get additional points of view. Link to comment
abitbroken Posted February 9, 2012 Share Posted February 9, 2012 Here is the other thread. I think rewards based systems are easy to administer for parents, but wouldn't it just train your daughter to only do things for physical rewards rather than learn to do them because she likes it or is the right thing to do? What about instead of giving your daughter little toys, that you intermix things with priveleged based rewards, or taking away those priveleges. She is old enough to understand that or to start to. Because your daughter is more in control at home, that says she is capable of good behavior. I am not a child development expert, but it puts a teacher, who is not passing out toys and stickers, at a disadvantage. While she may need other resources, self control is something kids learn at home. A teacher can tell kids what the rules are and enforce them but they can't teach them self control. What about rewarding her for things she does in school that are good? Finding out from the teacher if she acted out that day or if she followed instructions? Maybe she wil get that. Link to comment
mari2mila Posted February 9, 2012 Author Share Posted February 9, 2012 What about rewarding her for things she does in school that are good? Finding out from the teacher if she acted out that day or if she followed instructions? Maybe she wil get that. She has a daily behavior sheet that goes with her throughout the day. She can get a smiley, an indifferent, or a frown. She earns $0.10 for each smiley, and she's been saving her money to buy herself a DS. Her teacher has a reward system that benefits the class as a whole - they have to earn compliments together, which add up to a special day for everyone. I guess my observation is, that she is acting out in a profound way at school, and there must be a reason as to the 'why'. My task is to figure out the 'why', and somehow resolve it on my end, because the school/teachers aren't doing much, except reporting the behaviors to me. In a few years, my daughter will leave their school forever. But I will have her for life... Link to comment
Seraphim Posted February 9, 2012 Share Posted February 9, 2012 What helped my son was time. The more he matured the better his behavior got. Link to comment
mari2mila Posted February 9, 2012 Author Share Posted February 9, 2012 your daughter falls under the American's With Disabilities Act and thus has access to various forms of help). In what way? What help is available, and how would I go about requesting it? Link to comment
Moontiger Posted February 9, 2012 Share Posted February 9, 2012 In what way? What help is available, and how would I go about requesting it? I have dyslexia and A.D.D. my parents had to fight hard to get me what I needed. I don't remember much because my parents where the once to handle everything when I was in school, I do know that given her disorders she falls under section 504 of the ADA. I try and find a link about and post it for you. Link to comment
Moontiger Posted February 9, 2012 Share Posted February 9, 2012 Here is a link about the ADA: link removed Here is information about section 504: link removed Link to comment
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