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Did I do the right thing?


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My boyfriend of three years broke up with me about 2.5 months ago. I love him and miss him terribly, but I've been trying to stick to NC.


Tonight, he came to a concert in the city where I attend college. While I was eating dinner a couple of hours back, I got a text from him. It says, "I'm in (city name). It's weird that I'm not gonna visit you."


I haven't replied... am I doing the right thing? Thoughts? Am I just overanalyzing everything, as usual?

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Well, he'll only be here for tonight. I think they're driving home after the concert.


Ugh, my brain is telling me that I am going to make him mad or confirm in his head that I don't want to talk to him, even though that's the furthest thing from the truth... but I will try to stick to what you guys are telling me.

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You should stick with NC, he might be fishing for an ego boost, and he may have eventually offered to meet up if that's what you were hoping for, but you'd be wasting so much energy on it.


My ex and I were kind of playing 'cat and mouse' until recently, where one of us would try to get the other talking again and maybe meet up then would go completely cold again. This break up was last May!! So don't be where I am in a year, lol.

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So you guys don't think I sabotaged any kind of hope for reconciliation by not taking his "bait" this time?


No you didn't. He broke up with you and you had to deal with it...so now he has to deal with the fact that he doesn't call the shots with you and you can make the decision not to talk to someone who chose not to be with you.

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Thanks, guys. That's the mindset I was in when I decided not to respond, but it's hard not to over-think these sorts of things. Especially when I miss him so much and any kind of contact makes my heart explode. I know that continuing conversation would just have made me upset in the end, though.

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