Should I Foster My Friend's Dog?

[Cynder]

I have a friend who is currently homeless. How she got that way is a long complicated story that I'll spare the details of. She hasn't been homeless long. The humane society took her dog.

 

She's had this dog for four years, since he was a puppy. He was always well taken care of and loved.

 

She went to the Humane Society today to find out the fate of her dog... He is going to be put to sleep on Friday if she can't find someone to adopt him or provide foster care.

 

I have been a foster "parent" to animals before. It's not taking care of them that I mind... But there are some significant cons to taking in this dog. He is aggressive, for one. He knows me, but I am not his owner. So he might not be friendly to me. He also has fleas pretty bad. I am apartment hunting... Pet friendly apartments are rare here. And the ones that are pet friendly a lot of times will allow cats but not dogs.

 

Despite all this... I am still considering taking him in because I was present when my friend found out he would be put to sleep if no one can foster him. She was almost in hysterics. Her dog is one of the last things she has left. I feel like i have to do something.

 

But, at the same time... I do a lot for her already. I don't want her to be too dependent on me. She bathes here. I feed her. She does laundry here, uses my computer, is storing some stuff at my place... How much is too much, you know?

 

What do you all think?

[abitbroken]

Yes, I would adopt the dog from the pound and either find a nokill rescue group that will let you be the foster home until they find a home or have space in a foster home or keep the dog until she gets back on her feet if she is working towards that. I would also contact rescue groups and not pounds and tell them the story that your friend is homeless and you want to try and help save her dog. what state are you in?? Also, i would stop looking at apartment buildings and look at houses, flats, and buildings with 2-4 units owned by private parties rather than apartment complexes. Sometimes they can be more flexible at having pets.

 

Does the humane society work with any rescues that pull dogs from them? if so, could you tell the rescue that you will help with the dog if they save it - tell them the dog's story adn that its a really nice dog and you are willing to buy food, etc, to help them? or make a donation to them? I know she should suffer consequences for not being responsible, but the dog should not suffer. It was the worst thing taking the dog to a kill shelter. I know she felt she didn't have an option, but there are options.

[Fudgie]

I personally wouldn't adopt the dog if it's aggressive and has fleas. I understand that you want to spare your friend's feelings here but I don't think you should put your personal safety at risk to do so.

[redqueen21]

What a heartbreaking story If you can do it, definitely do it. As a dog owner myself, I can only imagine how your friend must feel. My dog is everything to me, he had to stay overnight with a vet once and I cried all night long even though I knew he was going to be fine, I just missed him so much it honestly hurt inside and out.

 

For the flea problem - there is a pill you can get from a Vet, if it is available where you live, called Comfortis I think. It will kill off all the fleas within like an hour or 2, plus since its a pill it can't be washed off, so a nice bath with a mild shampoo wouldn't hurt. Do you have any idea how long your friend may be homeless? I say just go ahead and take the dog for now and try to make the best of it, you'll probably feel so guilty if you don't. Try to get ahold of a crate you can keep him in for sleeping and when you can't be home.

 

You'll be doing the right thing. If you can't keep the dog for too long, at least save him for now and look into other arrangements that won't end with him getting put under, until your friend can get back on her feet.

[abitbroken]

if the humane society lets him live if he has a foster, see what you can arrange. Tell them you know the former owner and are willing to foster but need a few days or a week to get things together - would they hold the dog over if you are willing to foster? Also, it could be that when the dog is settled and out of the shelter, the dog will behave better especially if he could see her. if you allow her too. but i would be careful with that so she doesn't think she can jsut get3 the dog back,

[Snny]

I have a neighbor who has taken in 3 dogs from different families (whom he knows personally) who lost their jobs and went homeless. None of the dogs are aggressive. However, he is having severe issues with another neighbor who fears for the safety of their small child and has threatened to sue him because one of the dogs likes to run away and into their yard.

 

If you take in an aggressive dog, you will have difficulty having friends or dates over. You will be held responsible if the dog attacks a person while say... taking it out for walks. Also, like you said... apartment hunting is going to be difficult. You will be spending extra money to bring the dog over if there is an apartment that will let you have one. With your current situation, I don't think it will be wise to own up to the responsibility because it will impede on your own lifestyle. You have already provided your friend a home as is... isn't that enough?

[abitbroken]

btw, do you have another friend who would be willing to foster the dog under the condition that you would help out as well? I think that sometimes dogs need to see a trainer also or just are used to one single person and putting them in a shelter environment makes them worse.

[Cynder]

I texted her a little bit ago and asked her how bad the fleas are.

 

She said not too bad...

 

But then she asked me to come down to the bar. I told her I don't feel like it. I'm tired and it's also right before payday and I'm low on money. Just paid the rent and a few bills.

 

She said "You suck, I'm bored."

 

This bothers me. Last time I saw her she was crying about her dog. Now she's drinking at the bar? Who is buying the drinks?

 

I can't even say why it bugs me, but it does. I don't think she's trying as hard to get herself back together as she wants people to think.

[metrogirl]

I texted her a little bit ago and asked her how bad the fleas are.

 

She said not too bad...

 

But then she asked me to come down to the bar. I told her I don't feel like it. I'm tired and it's also right before payday and I'm low on money. Just paid the rent and a few bills.

 

She said "You suck, I'm bored."

 

This bothers me. Last time I saw her she was crying about her dog. Now she's drinking at the bar? Who is buying the drinks?

 

I can't even say why it bugs me, but it does. I don't think she's trying as hard to get herself back together as she wants people to think.

 

That would probably bother me too. If I had to guess, she probably wants someone to save her dog without her putting forth any effort to do it herself. If she has time to go to the bar and drink, then she has time to better her situation. Just sayin.

[Miss Firecracker]

I sure wouldn't do it for her, Cynder. And I hate to say this, but I just wouldn't do it period. You can't save all of them. And you have had a tough time with work and all. I don't really think it would be a good idea. It will limit your choice of homes. NO, I wouldn't do that.

[Snny]

I thought this person is homeless. What the hell is she doing going out for drinks?

[southerngirl]

As for the fleas that is what baths are for. You mention that the dog is aggressive, what kind of dog is it. Are we talking about an aggressive chihuahua or German Shepard? Big difference.

[Capricorn3]

If it's aggressive and has fleas, I wouldn't take it. Now she sits in a bar drinking? Where does she get the money from?

[Mesemene]

I'd worry about the aggression - some rescue groups won't even take aggression issues unless they feel it's trainable - too much possible danger to a prospective family member or visitor.

 

Fleas are fixable - aggressive tendencies might be - but that's a LOT of work you'd be investing, and for someone who's drinking instead of looking for other potential solutions. You're doing a ton for this person already. At some point, she's going to have to fend for herself.

 

If the dog is a specific breed, see if there's a rescue group who would be willing to take him on. If not, some no-kill rescues will accept for a small fee.

[Cynder]

That would probably bother me too. If I had to guess, she probably wants someone to save her dog without her putting forth any effort to do it herself. If she has time to go to the bar and drink, then she has time to better her situation. Just sayin.

 

Exactly... And the sad part is she probably only wanted me to come down to the bar so I could buy her drinks. She doesn't have any money.

[Cynder]

As for the fleas that is what baths are for. You mention that the dog is aggressive, what kind of dog is it. Are we talking about an aggressive chihuahua or German Shepard? Big difference.

 

It's a MinPin... miniature pincher, in otherwords. Basically a medium sized Doberman.

[Cynder]

I just want to say about the fleas... I know if I took this dog in, my two cats would also get fleas. I have a flea free apartment right now. My animals have had them before and they took forever to get rid of. So, it wouldn't be just about treating one animal for fleas, it would be about treating three.

[carbon14]

Also it might be difficult to treat a dog who's aggressive-will he bite you if you try to bathe him/apply meds? Also you'll have to start flea/tick prevention once you get rid of the original fleas-so buying Frontline, heartworm pills, the dog may need it's vaccine's updated, etc... Since you're already trying to save up for a new apartment, getting this dog may not be realistically affordable. And even though he's a min-pin, some apartment complexes have ridiculous breed restrictions and they may not allow him because he just looks like a doberman (sounds insane, but I know someone who had to move because their boxer "looked" like some kind of fighting dog!).

 

Plus I believe you're getting ready for a divorce, but still currently living with your husband-how would he react to the dog (I think I read somewhere he was already upset that your friend was showering at your house)? And I think your odd work hours would make caring for a dog difficult as well (might be wrong, but just the impression I get from some of your posts)? Even if you have time to walk him, will you have time to work on his aggressive behavior?

 

I love dogs, but I don't think this pup can realistically be saved-at least not by you. Definitely contact a breed rescue or any of your other friends who might can help. It's sad, but it doesn't sound like your friend is very responsible (hanging out at the barwhen she needs to be getting her life together) and unfortunately her dog will suffer for it. If she had raised a healthy, well trained, and friendly dog it might have had a better chance at being adopted.

[Fudgie]

I think it's your friend's fault that this is happening to her dog. Sorry, I'm not going to be nice about it, it IS her fault. You've done a lot for her and she just sits her butt in the bar all day. Maybe if she wasn't so concerned with getting drunk, she could have gotten a job and gotten her dog back.

 

I think this is the price that she has to pay and no, again, I don't think you should have to take in an aggressive, flea-infested dog so you can continue to enable her behaviour. How much more are you going to give? When is she actually going to set up and take responsibility for her life? When?

[PhilliesFan001]

I absolutely would take the dog, in a heartbeat. I've done it before and I'd do it again.

[PhilliesFan001]

Besides which, the dog shouldnt have to suffer because your friend's an idiot. I wouldn't make the dog a pawn in the "tough love to get you back on your feet" game.

 

If you 100% can't take the dog then i'd at least try to find another friend or rescue organization. Not to help your friend (doesnt sound like she deserves it) but for the dogs sake.

[PhilliesFan001]

Also - the dog is four years old. Too young for an otherwise healthy animal to be killed. And behavior wise, 4 years is hardly a lost cause.

[Cynder]

You bring up an excellent point about my work schedule. That was something that didn't even cross my mind. I work 60+ hours a week. My husband works 32-36 hours a week. So, in reality it would be my husband taking care of the dog more then I would. And no, he definitely wouldn't be happy if I brought a dog home, even if it was only temporary.

[PhilliesFan001]

Maybe you can help find the dog another home? It would really be a shame for a perfectly good 4 year old dog to be put down.

[Mesemene]

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Maybe this will help?