Writting an ex girlfriend a final letter to let them know how pissed you are?

[hnkmp55]

I have alot of feelings about my breakup. My ex isnt being to civil about it all. Im writting a letter saying all that I didnt get to say, to include how upset its made me. Some things in it may not be real nice, but wont get out of hand. I just want her to know exactly how I feel. To include her not contacting me again. Whats your thoughts?

[DN]

Write it but don't send it.

[doiiiieeezie]

Noo nooo nooo, I did that with an ex and it caused a lot of confusion and heartache. Write the letter and put it aside. Your anger will subside eventually.

[sidehop]

Agreed, don't send it. It's good to write out your emotions and find ways to realize why your ex isn't worth your time. Sending it will only fuel the fire that's already raging. Let her blow her own steam.

[hnkmp55]

I want her to know how I feel and at this point I never want to be with her again. We have tried it twice, and twice she has crushed me!

[d_lilah]

My thought is 'no' but i know how the angry phase feels like. I did this myself, and can say it solves nothing. It will just take you down to her level.

 

I think you should write it out and post it here...that way it's still out there, your feelings are expressed, and we could maybe advise you on what to say,if you are still determined to.

 

Don't do or say anything rash, and always remember that the people that know you the most always see the truth, no matter what others might do or say.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Write it for yourself but don't send it.

[WomanWriter]

Why would you tell her not to contact you if you are the one writing a letter and contacting her? I would just be furious and rip up your letter. She would never take you seriously. She would end up thinking that you're a controlling jerk for giving her a "piece of your mind" yet ending the letter by telling her not to contact you. You get to spout off at her but she's not allowed the same right? Definitely don't send it.

[gstan132]

yeah don't send it I agree with everyone else if you don't send it then that avoids confusion

[exes and oh no]

Don't send it. It's a slippery slope. It FEELS like it might give you closure and make it easier to move on, but then when you get back a non-caring response (or none at all), there's still no closure. That leads to another email, and another, and... you get the picture. Write it and send it to a friend, or somebody else. Chances are two days later you'll be glad you didn't say certain things that were in the letter.

[lucasky]

You can send it, but you know what? No matter how much time you spend on that letter, no matter how much you say, or how pointed your words are, you'll never feel fulfilled.

 

The reason is, you're writing this letter to inflict some sort of emotional tug upon her. You want her to feel some of the pain/anger you're feeling. And while writing is a great way to communicate emotions, it won't make things better.

 

On top of it being a failed attempt to unleash anger towards her, when you DO calm down (and believe me, someday you will), you'll regret having acted like a crazy ex.

 

There's something humbling about simply letting an ex go, even if it hurts so badly to remain calm. Months from now, you'll have a certain feeling of self-respect and dignity for not having lashed out at her.

[Pontius]

"Noo nooo nooo, I did that with an ex and it caused a lot of confusion and heartache. Write the letter and put it aside. Your anger will subside eventually."

 

 

 

 

 

 

There is such thing as righteous anger. Your advice is akin to telling Rosa Parks to sit at the back of the bus. Some things need to be said and frankly, the general attitude towards this type of communication is reflective of society's inability to maintain strong, equal relationships that endure the expected trivialities of strife.

[miss bear]

I agree. Don't send it. Write it and keep it. I did this and I actually wrote something without any anger and I got back an uncaring response.

Write it for yourself. Look at it in a few weeks or a few months, see how you feel then.

[lifeisgood93]

You can send it, but you know what? No matter how much time you spend on that letter, no matter how much you say, or how pointed your words are, you'll never feel fulfilled.

 

The reason is, you're writing this letter to inflict some sort of emotional tug upon her. You want her to feel some of the pain/anger you're feeling. And while writing is a great way to communicate emotions, it won't make things better.

 

On top of it being a failed attempt to unleash anger towards her, when you DO calm down (and believe me, someday you will), you'll regret having acted like a crazy ex.

 

There's something humbling about simply letting an ex go, even if it hurts so badly to remain calm. Months from now, you'll have a certain feeling of self-respect and dignity for not having lashed out at her.

 

Gosh, this is so well-put. It is the hardest thin to hold in your emotins - both the crying, hurt and the anger - and walk away with dignity, but it feels the best in the long-run. And I think the most poignant thing you said is tht the purpose is really because you are tring to get a reaction from your ex. We all want that. But sometimes you just have to do the hard thing - go silent and walk away. Easier said than done, but well worth it in the end.

[Live-N-Learn]

The best revenge is to go live a happy life without her. Indiffernce is your revenge as well.

[spandora]

Don't send it. I've been there, done that TOO many times. It always ends in heartbreak.

[tingkong]

What everyone else said man, it won't help you feel better at all. Just focus on healing.

[spandora]

Not to mention, when someone has treat you poorly, sometimes the best revenge is silence.