THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[saluk]

Trust me, you don't want a happy birthday wish! Not getting them sucks, but getting them is worse. Starts the whole thing up again. You don't want the memory to fade - you want the bad feelings that come up when you have the memory to fade. And it will! Stay strong. A little numbness is OK, and nothing to be afraid of.

[coldmoon]

Day 18

Atleast i had lots of distraction today.

[beanpot]

Trust me, you don't want a happy birthday wish! Not getting them sucks, but getting them is worse. Starts the whole thing up again. You don't want the memory to fade - you want the bad feelings that come up when you have the memory to fade. And it will! Stay strong. A little numbness is OK, and nothing to be afraid of.

 

That's... spot on. Thank you

[alldaisies]

Day 8

 

I survived, he cannot wheedle his way around me anymore, this time he cannot.

 

I have read enough about silent treatment and narcissit personality, enough to understand him and his play. I need, want and deserve better than this. I deserve more than crumbs.

[ginciagin]

It's been two weeks since the last time we were in contact. I was doing just fine, wasn't checking his social media, my anger kind of dissapeared, I was moving forward. Until one day I posted a song on Facebook and he all of the sudden decided to message me to tell me he really liked it and sent me a link of the song he had thought I would like too. By the way, the song was sort of about love triangle (he is dating someone else already. Maybe I went to far overanalyzing the lyrics ha-ha.

Baam, the whole healing process started again as all the negative emotions resurfaced with the wish to check on him again..

So its been a week now since he sent that song..I feel better, but still an odd thought about him pops in my head along with some negative emotions. But I haven't checked his social media.. I'm getting there!

[sadbutrue]

It's hard to not the social media ...That's deff the worse part for me, the curiosity is immense.

I just checked his profile and noticed that he liked some girl's pictures. Makes me pissed off, but I know it's not right to feel this way.

2 weeks no contact for me as well

[beanpot]

Day 10: The weekends are always a challenge. I miss you so much. I used to work through my weeks with the weekend as my reward so I could see you. Now... I dread the weekends. I run so I can push out those thoughts from my head temporarily.

[coldmoon]

Day 19,

Proud of myself that i haven't contact him so far.

[alldaisies]

Day 9

 

Maybe I should stop writing here, and just do it when he tries to contact me again, if he ever do it.

 

I am feeling better, yesterday was a difficult day for me to handle, but I did not write to him again, what makes me feel more confident and more in control of the situation. Game is over for him.

[coldmoon]

Day 9

 

Maybe I should stop writing here, and just do it when he tries to contact me again, if he ever do it.

 

I am feeling better, yesterday was a difficult day for me to handle, but I did not write to him again, what makes me feel more confident and more in control of the situation. Game is over for him.

 

I'm glad you feel better today, stay strong

[sadbutrue]

Haha... so true... I'm in no contact, but I wish they would contact me... oy...

 

He contacted me yesterday

He just said my name ...o.o I guess it's not right to reply

[beanpot]

Day 11: It's not getting better. It's not getting better. Why are you leaving.

[beanpot]

He contacted me yesterday

He just said my name ...o.o I guess it's not right to reply

 

God that's a hard situation...

[coldmoon]

day 20,

 

:suspicion:

[rlhuk]

Day 11:

 

Haven't thought about him all weekend. Hooked up with an old friend that I used to have "fun" with so I guess that really took my mind of it. Even today with the Monday blues. Actually starting to think that it was a good thing he didn't want to get back with me...

[alldaisies]

Day 10

 

I just read, that Love and/or hate always fetter us. In order to forget a person, we must become indifferent to him/her. Of course the greater the number of memories we have with that person, the harder is to move on. The article also say that we cannot erase a person from our mind trying no to think in him/her.

 

I believe this NC thing is very good for all of us. It has helped me to share my thoughts and has kept me strong in my moments of weakness.

 

I am feeling better, much better today. As rlhuk, I am starting to appreciate the fact that he has not intended to contact me again.

[beanpot]

Day 12: Today is one of those days where the thousand "what-ifs" come into mind. I try so hard to distract myself. So hard. But I fail.

[alldaisies]

Oh my god, he is there again, trying to contact me again, disturbing my peace. Why is he there again? Why?..I have enough problems in my life already.

[coldmoon]

day 21/ 3 weeks

 

I'm almost not crying anymore, but i still think of him nonstop

[beanpot]

Oh my god, he is there again, trying to contact me again, disturbing my peace. Why is he there again? Why?..I have enough problems in my life already.

 

I'm sorry It's gotta be everything you can do to stay silent and not buckle. You have some crazy strong resolve. Good on you!

[beanpot]

day 21/ 3 weeks

 

I'm almost not crying anymore, but i still think of him nonstop

 

At least you've gotten to the almost no crying stage

[rlhuk]

Day 12:

 

Not really sure how I feel today.

[alldaisies]

Back to Day 1

 

Sorry I broke the pact. I replied his message with a calm, inexpressive and unrelated sentence, ignoring his words, but giving him acknowledge that I read it, silence presided.

[ginciagin]

I have done as well, only to give him my contact number so he could get my things posted to me! After a few months...

[alldaisies]

Day 11 or Back to day 1

 

Here I am again. Suddenly out the blue he called me. He was telling me how much he care for me, more specifically, he was asking me if I believe how much he cares for me, giving me details of his life. It was really weird, a normal conversation to some extend, using many adjetives to describe me and some sugar, but I did not buy this time. I felt some cover interest in that cordiality, no idea what is behind this. I have become suspicious. Could be so many things: 1. he really love me and he is sensing that he is losing me to the point of no return 2. He needs to know some personal information about me and he is distracting me, covering the questions under all that sugar coating (I am kind of inclined to this second option, for some details I cannot reveal).

 

The good thing about all of this, it is that I have recovered my strength, this time I am not as affected as I have been before. I am not longer waiting for him. If he talk to me fine, if no fine too. I respect people and relations. He is with somebody else, no with me. He does not respect her, and me either.

 

I still love him, because we cannot choose who we love. But he is not for me.

 

I am happy that I have finally found the way to deal with this, it was not about to forget him (that is impossible), it was to find the way to become indifferent to his presence because he is doing something I do not like. Betraying the relation he is in it is a big NO for me.