THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[Mellow1]

I tried but for some reason that option isnt available with your name. You may have pm turned of in your profile

 

I really do need a friend so I'm giving you my email email removed

[BMarie89]

I accept the challenge. We broke up 11 weeks ago (see Did my panicking ruin my relationship for good?) and now I'm finally adhering to NC. I started today and today has been fairly easy, but I know all days won't be this way. Glad I ran accross a site and thread like this to help me through it. I do hope he forgives my post-break up actions and really start to think, reevaluate and eventually come back around, but right now I'm focusing on moving on and getting myself together.

[Slowjam35]

Day 1 (Read situation here if you like - )

 

Yesterday was the worst. Hung out with a friend at the mall, but everything reminded me of my ex. Certain stores, the movie theatre, clothing items, etc. I even heard "our" song while walking by one of the stores. I couldn't take it. When I got home, I went to check her facebook, and what do you know? She blocked me. That shouldn't have bothered me much, but it hurt so bad for some reason. I was really depressed all night, and honestly I still am. She was really the only person I had in my life. Though I did realize that was a problem even when we were together. But now that she's gone it's like I have nobody...

[figmentations]

Day 9 (formerly 21 days had I not broken NC)

 

21 days, wow. Tomorrow it would have been 11 months together. I cried today when I went over to a friend's house. Fridays always get me down since it was the day BU happened so it's already 3 weeks. I feel better, my low points aren't as low or as sad but they do come sporadically now and then. Mostly edging toward the end of the week and the weekend. Still no contact from the ex, hoping she never talks to me again at this point but I find myself wishing the opposite many times.

[heartbrokengir]

Day 24:

 

Feeling more down than usual, this week was weird. It's been 3 weeks since BU, for the past two days, I haven' t been feeling as strong as I'd like. But doesn't matter, I will keep doing NC because this is such a great way/method to heal

[IAmFCA]

day 12. posting now just to get the counting done, then back to sleep.

 

clearly I waited too long to get to nc, because it feels like another era when I was stuck on him.

 

didn't miss him at all at the concert. was kind of nice actually not to have brought a friend of any kind, and be freed of that responsibility.

 

Going back to sleep. felt good not to post here at all yesterday. I might take a break.

[james31]

Day 18... today started well, but like every other weekend, sitting around and not being busy with work leaves me with too much time and too many thoughts going through my head.

 

 

I missed her alot today... i miss having someone who loves me, someone who was there for me no matter what, she loved me and supported me whilst i was away at recruit training.

Just alot of old memorys and feelings that i am yet to deal with properly.

[blukate]

I accept the challenge! I can do this..

[Bunney]

After 5 days of NC I broke it yesterday. I messaged him on facebook about something that happened, and I wanted to have a talk I guess (on skype). He said its too early to skype and to tell him on FB instead.

He said he cares about me more than anyone in the world but that he can't be together with me. Then I asked him to be honest, if he's talking to someone else. He replied that he isn't, and that he doesn't want to be with any girl atm.

 

We ended up catching up some and updating eachother on our lives. Somehow.. I feel a lot better now (even better than yesterday), I don't feel as abandoned. Those 5 days of NC have given me some clarity, and tbh I'm not sure I would take him back at this point. I feel like I can move on properly now.

[BMarie89]

Day 2....The morning has proven to be very rough for me. Saw a recent pic the girl im assuming is his new gf uploaded on instagram, and he commented with 3 heart-eye emojis. That really hurt to see that, and I know its my fault for waking up and snooping. I want to call or text so bad, but besides me not needing to, he probably wouldn't answer or reply anyway. I miss him so much, and after almost three years together, I feel like he doesn't miss me at all because he seems to be so into her. I just don't get it because they not even in the same city. How can he break up with me, and we're long distance, and then jump into another relationship 2 months later thats long distance. This hurts so bad and I want an explanation, but I guess I won't get one.

[Amandacast57]

Today is day 22. I cried for the first time. I guess it's starting to feel like maybe it is really over, that I won't get the phone call. I thought he meant the things he said, but I guess the silence says otherwise.

[El3216]

Day 2....The morning has proven to be very rough for me. Saw a recent pic the girl im assuming is his new gf uploaded on instagram, and he commented with 3 heart-eye emojis. That really hurt to see that, and I know its my fault for waking up and snooping. I want to call or text so bad, but besides me not needing to, he probably wouldn't answer or reply anyway. I miss him so much, and after almost three years together, I feel like he doesn't miss me at all because he seems to be so into her. I just don't get it because they not even in the same city. How can he break up with me, and we're long distance, and then jump into another relationship 2 months later thats long distance. This hurts so bad and I want an explanation, but I guess I won't get one.

 

He's rebounding with her! It's very unlikely that he's head over heels for this new random chick. We ( the dumpee's) granted in a male.. We always feel the pain longer ( unless the role gets reversed in the process)

 

He's focusing his attention on this new girl with out anything by lust fueling it. Obviously I don't know anything about him personally but this seems pretty standard accross the bored.

 

I feel like women have a higher advantage when it comes to NC. If you cut this guy out. REALLY make an effort to make yourself better then you are now ( not saying anything is wrong with you now ). He will notice and he will regret giving you up.

 

I feel like guys are more primitive when it comes to breaking up with women. He thinks he can do better. In his mind the grass is greener in the other side. When he jumps the fence and sees his beautiful ex girlfriend thriving and in a better state then when he left her he will have a rush of regret. Then it will be him trying to bust his ass to get you back!! Pm me and ill give you my e-mail. I'd like to know if you try this and it works.

[Kimcwell]

Today is day 22. I cried for the first time. I guess it's starting to feel like maybe it is really over, that I won't get the phone call. I thought he meant the things he said, but I guess the silence says otherwise.

 

I'm at the same place regarding NC, and I've started to lose hope as well.

[BMarie89]

Pm me and ill give you my e-mail. I'd like to know if you try this and it works.

 

It won't let me Pm you! Here is my story however!

[BMarie89]

Broke no contact. Was ok at first, but he was complaining he was hungry and didn't have any money. Wasn't going to do anything, but ended up ordering a $8 pizza for him. Nothing big or major BUT I feel like crap. He hasn't replied since he told me he picked it up. We help each other every now and again, but it hurts when I help and he resumes not talking to me. I know I shouldn't have done it, especially when I was helping with ulterior motives,

[tk80]

19 days and running! Proud of myself for doing it but I feel especially bad today. Weekends are the worse, and mornings too, as I still have nightmares with him nonstop. I think what triggered the whole thing was a wedding party yesterday. I just felt that what this couple has I though I would have, and now this seems further than ever. This morning I was actually questioning whether this guy EVER loved me. I cannot see how someone can give the cold shoulder to the person you loved for more than a decade. He told me he still loved me in the end of december. It's april...what kind of love is that? Maybe I just convinced myself he was a better person than he really is...? Does anyone feel that way too?

[james31]

Im feeling exactly the same... tomorrow would have been our 12 month anniversery and i have been thinking about it alot.

She hasnt messaged me at all, she said she loved me more than anything else in life and we were just about to move in to a new unit together.

 

Even though i have started seeing someone else and she makes me happy... knowing she has turned the cold shoulder to me is very hard

day 19 should be like every other day...

[Ne Moe]

Day 4

 

I didn't post on day 3 because I was busy. But today is day 4. Definitely not finding it as hard this time around. It's even easier because he is no longer on my mind 24/7. I still think about him a lot. But hours pass now where he doesn't even enter my head. Thank god for progress!!!

[Amandacast57]

I'm at the same place regarding NC, and I've started to lose hope as well.

 

It just feels like its getting harder

[figmentations]

Day 11 (formerly 23 days had I not broken NC)

 

Went out clubbing with friends, ended up making out with some girl who wanted to meet me. It was ok but before she kissed me, I began to feel that agony of missing my ex and still being in love with her. I've realized now that I am not over her at all, only feeling better because of NC but I just wish more than ever that she'd talk to me again and be together but it's all just stupid wishful thinking that's not gonna happen. The temptation to break NC is low at the moment and I hope I can stick to it. Nothing good will come out of talking to someone who is ignoring me completely.

[heartbrokengir]

Day 26.

 

I think like everyone I'm starting to regress a little too, I actually thought about calling him (but would never actually do it) and I started losing some focus on myself and wondered if he is over me. It's interesting how the mind works sometimes

[Amandacast57]

Day 26.

 

I think like everyone I'm starting to regress a little too, I actually thought about calling him (but would never actually do it) and I started losing some focus on myself and wondered if he is over me. It's interesting how the mind works sometimes

 

AGREED!!!! I've thought a lot about calling mine too although I never would. I play out scenarios in my head like asking him if he wants his things back or in June, texting him happy birthday.

 

Don't you wonder that if we are thinking this much about them and regressing, are they??

[beaton]

DAY 15

 

wow, halfway to 30!

 

I actually do feel a lot better from day 1. I haven't heard anything from him and I honestly hope I don't. I'm not sure how I would react. I visit the state I moved from (where he still lives.. I think??) and I'm nervous that I'm going to run into him because we have many mutual friends. Though he MIGHT have moved, because I know he planned to soon. I really have no idea. I hope he's not there. It would be nice not to have the temptation.

 

I had a dream about him for the first time in a while last night and didn't wake up an emotional mess, so that's nice.

[Alone Now]

It just feels like its getting harder

 

Totally agree! Even with a new guy in the picture, I find it is hard to forget about him. He owns a piece of my heart and with that I feel like I am using the new guy which was never an intent.

 

Amandacast57 - Stay strong and enjoy your day!

[Amandacast57]

I guess I'll make my official post with my feelings for today...

 

Day 23.

 

Gosh, I really don't even know how to address my feelings. I feel pretty alone right now. My 2 best friends are married, one with kids and the other pregnant and I just feel like I don't really have anyone to talk to or spend my time with. I've tried to focus on myself. I've always been pretty healthy but I've wanted to have some sort of abs showing come summer time so I've really cleaned up my diet and started working out more. I've always been pretty creative but its almost counter productive because although I feel proud of the things that I do/accomplish, I remember my ex saying that he liked those things about me. So after I cook this amazingly healthy dinner or paint this really awesome picture, it makes me sad because I wonder "why don't you want me?".

 

With summer coming up, it seems like it is going to be even harder. We spent a lot of time at his parent's house at the pool last summer. We even took up stand up paddle boarding for the first time and we LOVED IT! I remember him telling me that if I walked out of his life, he would call me during the summer to go paddle boarding.

 

I just can't understand this. I can't understand how I was SO different from the previous girls he dated, how I treated him so well and this is what I get. I find myself being absolutely ridiculous, spending hours searching forums for examples of exes that contacted the person they broke up with months later. And then I think to myself "So what? That doesn't mean HE will contact YOU". I just don't deserve this. In my past relationships, I know I did things wrong. I feel like I really made it a point to do everything right. I know I had my flaws like maybe being overemotional once in a while, but I was loving, honest, faithful, loyal and just everything he wanted. Who walks away from something like that?