THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[sharky988]

Good for you, Bozz!!!!!!!

 

I think you did the right thing! Sounds like you handled it perfectly, too. She's hurt you ENOUGH and this last bit was just completely unnecessary. Now you can get back to healing and moving on!

 

I'm not counting days, either. I know I'm at 6 weeks NC, I don't mind keeping track of the weeks -- soon to be months. Part of me is still really hoping he'll change his mind.... but the larger part realizes that even if he does, I CAN'T take him back anymore. It's been too long, it's been too many days of suffering -- and knowing he's spending the holidays with another woman is just killing me.

 

THANK GOD for NC!!!!!! It's the only thing saving me right now.

[The Bozz]

Good for you, Bozz!!!!!!!

 

I think you did the right thing! Sounds like you handled it perfectly, too. She's hurt you ENOUGH and this last bit was just completely unnecessary. Now you can get back to healing and moving on!

 

I'm not counting days, either. I know I'm at 6 weeks NC, I don't mind keeping track of the weeks -- soon to be months. Part of me is still really hoping he'll change his mind.... but the larger part realizes that even if he does, I CAN'T take him back anymore. It's been too long, it's been too many days of suffering -- and knowing he's spending the holidays with another woman is just killing me.

 

THANK GOD for NC!!!!!! It's the only thing saving me right now.

 

Thanks. You too stay strong. Things can only get better from now on.

[HopelessDream]

Coming up on 1 month of NC. I saw him a few days ago, first time I've seen him since the breakup ugh... Anyways I'm proud of myself for making it this far! Now I just have to keep pushing forward

[ghost1ee]

Day 16

 

Had a great day yesterday. Haven't really thought much about my ex, and for the few times I did, I only felt a really small sadness, but nothing compared to the last two weeks. I have this feeling that I am finally moved on, but there's still that hint of sadness. I went to another friend's house and met up with a bunch of friends. We talked and talked and they prayed for me for my departure for med school. It was touching, and I thanked them all. Took pictures. Felt great. Planning on watching The Hobbit with them...even though the Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit were both shot at NZ, my ex's country. Oh well. I still love NZ despite this tragic misfortune. But yea, I am feeling like myself again. Reconnecting with a lot of my old friends, and meeting new ones. Other girls are starting to look attractive to me again. Ohhh yeahh. Alright. That's it. I'll keep it short today.

 

EDIT: OH and happy 12/12/12 everyone! I spent it on my friend's house. Stayed there til 12/12/12 @ 12:12:12. LOL.

[rachellsa]

Day 26 NC. Not heard from him in 9 days.

 

Feel just fine! Applying for a job that sounds amazing. The trouble is I want it sooo bad I'm scared I won't get it!! I suppose a jobs like a relationship sometimes! Really feeling good at the moment but still can't shake that feeling like somethings not quite ended, guess it's that closure thing everyone raves about!! I feel like I just want him to know I'm doing great without him, I want to throw it all in his face.

[Kirstya59]

Day 16 - todays been a little easier, havnt thought as much about him. Still though i miss him and want him back. I know hes really struggling with the loss of his dad right now, and i hate that i cant be there for him. Ahwell

[The Bozz]

Day 0:

 

No, really, day 0 again. She contacted me again. Again, her message had what seems to be the best of intentions, but had horrible timing. She's very bad at relationships. Stupid me replied again, but this time I made it clear that I need NC to get better and why, and that it's not personal. Hopefully she'll get the message now.

[ghost1ee]

Day 17

 

A girl I met at a party last week commented on my facebook. I asked her if she wants to hang out again, and she said she's available Friday. So we're most likely getting something for lunch this Friday. I asked for her phone number, and she gave it to me. My car battery died while I was at a gas station and ordering Subway last night, and me and her ended up talking the whole time. She told me where she was from, vice versa, and I just enjoyed talking to her. My bro then came and helped me with the car, it was raining, and another dude that claimed to own an autoshop helped us too. I ended up missing Spurs v. Jazz game, with Jazz winning by 3 I believe. Damn, such misfortune again.

 

But back to the ex-talk, I'll keep it short. I don't really want to think about her that much anymore, nor want to talk about her too much. I consider her gone in my life. I accept that. Not really sad and hung up on it anymore. I'm planning on talking more to this other girl today.

[eastonweston]

Great job, Ghost!

[benjii]

Day 3 for me and heart breaking feel like booing my eyes out at work. last night had a dream that everything was ok work up at 3am rolled over to hug her and she wernt there booed my eyes out all night love her so much hurting knowing she's fine

[Mistykitty]

Day 13

Holy crap, time is going by so fast. Almost two weeks

I'm starting to think he hasn't texted me because I told him I needed to heal. but that would mean he was compassionate, and I don't think that's true I have a date tomorrow, I'm really excited

[zep]

Day 13

Holy crap, time is going by so fast. Almost two weeks

I'm starting to think he hasn't texted me because I told him I needed to heal. but that would mean he was compassionate, and I don't think that's true I have a date tomorrow, I'm really excited

 

Great job Misty! Let us know how the date goes!

[levie]

So 4 days, didn't reply to text from my ex where he said he's "busy for the next few days" to meet me. Blah.

Made out with a cute man. Have a few dates arranged. Getting over fast.

[Kirstya59]

Day 17 - went out with a male friend today and teally enjoyed myself. Helps me not to think of my ex... Then i saw my exs car outside his sister and it made me want to message him ahhhh want the pain to go

[rachellsa]

Day 27 - Yep, fine! Tempted to look at his facebook cause I was bored earlier. stopped myself. Yay.

[NCForeverGirl]

Day 42.

 

6 weeks! I finally got there!

 

I've promised myself that at 8 weeks I will completely let go of him, which means no more thinking about him, no more posting on this thread, and no more visiting this forum. I don't think I will be able to completely let go until I stop visiting this forum. It has been brilliant here though. I'm so glad I signed up! Reading how others are going through the same thing has made this whole process a lot easier for me.

 

Only 2 more weeks left now...

[rippedinsides]

DAY 1

 

I'm back to day 1 because I felt I needed to really focus on healing myself and moving on.

 

The ex has been contacting me and it drives me crazy when I have to hold myself and not respond.

 

Today, after a great deal of effort, I decided it's better to just be clear with him about what I want and make him understand why I need to cut out contact. We spoke and I told him that I need space to heal and I just can't do it with him contacting me all the time. He agreed to stop.

 

Now comes the tough part - he agreed to put an end to all contact....but can I??? I don't know. My heart is yearning to reach out to him. I so badly want him to tell me that there is no way he is cutting contact with me and that he wants to set things right. But I know that's not practical. I need to heal now. I just hope I'm not hurting myself more. I feel like I'm ripping my heart out while it is still beating, with my own two hands.

 

Anyway....day one. Hope this time I can get over him.

[The Bozz]

Day 1:

 

She didn't contact me again. Seems she really got the message and will be respecting NC unless she wants to get back with me.

 

The confusion caused by her contacting me again has disappeared. Talking to her helped me clarify some things, mainly not seeing her as some kind of monster anymore, but also totally confirms some suspicions about our relationship and her behavior:

* She never thought about my feelings (confirmed by the way she forced herself on me to say what she wanted to say, even after I asked her not to)

* She had stopped being in love with me for a while, and just "loved" me as a close friend (it's incredible, just how much this hurts - even if I thought I already knew). She herself hadn't realized, mostly because she never stopped to think about it, even when I asked and told her her coldness hurt me.

 

So she's still a selfish, egotistic, immature brat. I love her even so, and even after all this time. I wish she would be more conscious about the way she treats others. Ugh. I want her to grow up so bad.

[ghost1ee]

Great job, Ghost!

 

Thanks E!

 

Day 18

The last day was really fun-filled and exciting for me. The girl that I was texting the other day, yes we were also texting yesterday, throughout the whole day. I even made her phone battery almost die out b/c we've been texting since yesterday morning until her battery almost ran out that afternoon. She had to work out in the school gym with her friends, and afterwards, she texted me right away again. We are planning to eat lunch today at a Mexican restaurant, and she invited two of his girl friends, and I also invited two of my guy friends. I'm also planning on buying some tees and clothes b/c I need to start packing up for med school soon. It was really a great day. Watched a couple NBA games again. Went home and ate some delicious sausage cooked by my mom. It was wonderful. I hardly thought about my ex, and for the few times I did, I didn't really feel anymore sadness or regret. It was just like thinking of another regular person in the past. I'll have to thank this idea, strict NC, because I can now confidently say that I've fully let go. I am now able to do my things for the past few days without feeling sadness or anything. Just being surrounded with positive and supportive people really does make the difference. Confiding to a really close friend also helped a lot. I want to watch The Hobbit today. We'll see if time permits b/c there's so much to do today!

[rachellsa]

Day 28! Meh! Feel fine.

[JJMong]

Day 4

 

I broke up with my ex more than a month ago, I had some communication in between, which made me feel terrible every time. So I try stronger. I hope to see the sunshine again in my life.

I try to think this as my life chance to develop myself, and to enjoy how wonderful it is to be single. This way of thinking really helps so far.

[Mistykitty]

Day 14

Date was great My face hurts from smiling so much, eheheeh. Still thought about my ex a bit though, so I know its too soon for anything serious, buuut I can still have fun

[rippedinsides]

Day 2

 

Managed to get through without contacting him. Had a rather bad day today because I couldn't help thinking of all the times we shared. I ask myself how he can just let go of me so easily. Was this all that I meant to him? He gives me a whole lot of excuses. But when a person REALLY loves another, isn't it supposed to be against all odds? **sigh** Wish love didn't hurt so much. I'm trying to think of what he has done to me and trying to stay on NC. Will always love him. Just got to love myself more than him so that I can be strong. After all....it's MY life.

[rippedinsides]

Day 1:

* She had stopped being in love with me for a while, and just "loved" me as a close friend (it's incredible, just how much this hurts - even if I thought I already knew). She herself hadn't realized, mostly because she never stopped to think about it, even when I asked and told her her coldness hurt me.

 

So she's still a selfish, egotistic, immature brat. I love her even so, and even after all this time. I wish she would be more conscious about the way she treats others. Ugh. I want her to grow up so bad.

 

I know how this feels - I've had the person I loved telling me that he loves me but he's not in love with me. Just hang in there and be strong. I know you wish that she will grow up and realise what she's doing. But you need to be prepared for that fact that with some people, as long as you hand aground, they will never grow up. It happened to me. I've been on this forum for over a year and each time it's the same story. He loves me - he loves me not - he loves me - he loves me not. I'm tired of this emotional rollercoaster. And this would have never happened if I had made myself unavailable and moved on with life. I kept waiting for him, and only got kicked in the end. Just hang in there and don't let anyone hurt you ever again. They are not worth it.

[JJMong]

Day 5.

 

I am leaving this country two days later for 3 weeks so I am packing. quite excited to visit my family.

I hope this trip makes me stronger.

I wonder how he will feel about me leaving for a while..

I wonder if he would miss me..

but I am just wondering.

I will make myself stronger.

No Contact during the holidays.

That's my goal.