THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[LostDavid]

It was that deep down aspect that I finally got to shut off a few days ago, at my lowest point. Now as I'm learning to live with that switch off, I have to figure out how to turn off all the side switches that make me look others up

 

 

I need to learn this. So far I'm holding off due to the respones from Bite, it's just, sigh I'm sure you know what I mean.

[FoundYet]

I do know. The waiting is horrid when the heart is so lost.

Time sucks.

[FoundYet]

ps I am soo the worst person and shouldn't to be saying anything about relationships right now too. I'm still messed up and slowly working on it. Even though I had my ah hah moment, I'm barely crawling out and making side tracks as I go...

[Snowgrrl83]

Second try at NC. I miss him this morning. I wish he was here in bed with me to cuddle and I wish I was going to the resort this weekend with him.

 

 

 

Although I know I'm better off without him.

[anon12]

Day 1, after the events that happened last night ( see my thread )

nothings going to happen between us again

 

Time to start healing, for the 3rd time.

[klafeoj]

Day um.... 15 ... it would be our 4 year anniversary today. BUT instead of staying in, there is a mixer and a swing dance tonight so i have a busy evening My Ex for some reason has esp when it comes to me enjoying myself... soooo i am anticipating some sort of drama on her part... we shall see. Either way fun fun fun

[klafeoj]

Oh BTW annon i am sorry for what happened... second chances are rare in life (let alone third) and your ex should have seen the opportunity when it was presented. But your story is informative. It is the dark side of reconciliation and an example of why you need to be somewhat guarded and careful when proceeding.

[Snowgrrl83]

I sent him an email. Doh! Here is what it said:

 

"Don't be like a beaten woman that keeps on going back for more.

 

Find a psychologist. Here is one that I've used:

 

Name of psychologist

Number

 

He specializes in relationships and has an office near your house.

Take care,

Snowgrrl 83"

[anon12]

Thanks, just a pain in the arse theres always going to be that what if factor,

keep away from people who are too preocupied in what others think about them, rather then doing what they want.

 

Atleast im young, and leart alot of lessons. Just hope it doesnt effect my trusting nature with other people.

[Snowgrrl83]

He replied *sigh*

Heres what it said

"Thanks for looking out for me... You are so sweet..."

 

NC!

[LostDavid]

He replied *sigh*

Heres what it said

"Thanks for looking out for me... You are so sweet..."

 

NC!

 

You're just hurting yourself but I do wish you the best.

[bitebenot]

Day 3

 

No contact on either end. Wondering how she's doing. Hope she is taking care of herself and doing well. I miss her. The urges to send out an e-mail or pick up the phone and call are so great at times I fear I lose it.

 

I am praying every night before bed that she realizes and comes to her senses that she married me for a reason, that she still loves me for a reason and I hope she can over look any ill feeling she has that somehow she conjured up over the months to get to this point. Wishing that this nightmare will end, but a part of me, a tiny part, feels I'll be getting some document in the mail within the next two weeks so *sigh* I need to start embracing for it.

 

Just hang in there and dont be negative,wont help none.You think too much,make your brain slow down a bit.The worse that can happen to you his having a terminal cancer.Your healthy,your young...the lights will shine again and for the better and you know that.Work on that part of your life.We can always find better,dream about it,its permitted to do so.

[cheeseboy]

Day 3, although i got contacted by her yesterday - do i start again or subtract one

[bitebenot]

-bitebenot-

 

I did it again. I went and looked at the new girls page.. For some reason I think just looking at her page is the lesser of the two evils and their was nothing there yesterday... but today there was. I just froze. Then quickly went away. I am torturing myself and it's so hard to stop. A 30yr old and a teen, I just dont get it. And I know I never will. I just feel so used and stupid and hurt. sigh..

 

As long as you have learned something from that small event its positive.

Stop kicking your behind ! Stay away from it ! Every time you do so you push your healing further and further away ! Start to fall in love with yourself.

Look in a mirror and tell yourself you are beautyful ! Think of the days you were whitout him and reach that goal.You were ok whithout him and you still are.Its always in between our ears.In NC he cant hurt you,you can only hurt yourself as you can see.Hang in there,you'll make for sure.

[LostDavid]

Day 1 (sigh !!!!!!!)

 

Today I got a visit on my profile on the singles site that we used to talk to on. Newly joined female today (3 years younger than my Wife) and this person visited my profile TWICE in one day. No photo, random user name, and a city in Cali. I caved in and went to her profile and noticed that they were "both" on during the same time. Ironically ...

 

I am HOPING (someone please confirm or tell me I'm a fricking moron and it's not true) it is her because it means she is craving for me and missing me more and more. Especially to go to such lengths to make a secondary profile to visit me.

 

I feel terrible at times, I still cry (such a manly Marine thing to do right?) when I think about her. I miss her a lot but having such thoughts (read above) that she is looking at my profile and missing me, helps me a lot and gives more hope even if there is none (it's hard to describe).

 

So here's for hoping and going on Day 1 for the second time.

[bitebenot]

Day 1, after the events that happened last night ( see my thread )

nothings going to happen between us again

 

Time to start healing, for the 3rd time.

 

I never saw something like that before ! This is very unique ! She really took you for a ride ! That relationship cant be salvaged anymore. Sorry about that,i really wanted you to have success in getting her back.That experience will serve you for a lifetime,thats the positive side of it.You do deserve a lot better.Now its time for healing and forget her totaly and never talk to her again.Good luck to you,your a good man.

[bitebenot]

Its not day one because you took a look...just keep going from where you were.By the way,it might be her ! I would really think it was ! She will try all she can to see what your up to ! Do you really think she would tell you now that she misses you ? Of course not ! She wants to show you shes " tough " ! Women are very curious by nature,more than men.Good to know that shes snooping around.Let her stew over it,will do her good.And for you,stay has a ghost,for her you no longer exist !

[LostDavid]

Its not day one because you took a look...just keep going from where you were.By the way,it might be her ! I would really think it was ! She will try all she can to see what your up to ! Do you really think she would tell you now that she misses you ? Of course not ! She wants to show you shes " tough " ! Women are very curious by nature,more than men.Good to know that shes snooping around.Let her stew over it,will do her good.And for you,stay has a ghost,for her you no longer exist !

 

Oh OK then Day 3 still!

 

I am hoping it is her and it's very likely it is. Why would a female in Cali look me up twice when I'm in PA within one day? Yeah she is a tough cookie, doesn't need to prove it.

 

Really happy to know she's snooping around! And if it is her I hope it does indeed do her well. I plan on staying as a ghost with no contact. Just excited.

 

So how much do I owe you now for our tharapist sessions? lol

[bitebenot]

Oh OK then Day 3 still!

 

I am hoping it is her and it's very likely it is. Why would a female in Cali look me up twice when I'm in PA within one day? Yeah she is a tough cookie, doesn't need to prove it.

 

Really happy to know she's snooping around! And if it is her I hope it does indeed do her well. I plan on staying as a ghost with no contact. Just excited.

 

So how much do I owe you now for our tharapist sessions? lol

 

Free for good people.Try to stay away from her for your own sanity.

You know now shes looking for you.Why do i think she likes to play poker ?

Is there a chance shes bluffing you ?

[LostDavid]

Free for good people.Try to stay away from her for your own sanity.

You know now shes looking for you.Why do i think she likes to play poker ?

Is there a chance shes bluffing you ?

 

I'm trying to stay away but remember; we're talking about my Wife still so that vow part of me is still there. I just need to let her "worry" or "realize."

 

Also I'm not sure if she likes to play poker to be honest. In our four years together I never seen her request to play it once or play it at all. There is always a chance, but I find it very very very unlikely she is bluffing me.

[bitebenot]

Day 3, although i got contacted by her yesterday - do i start again or subtract one

 

The more you will ignore her the better it will be.Taking her calls or answering emails are not gooood ! Your to easy and she knows it.

She knows shes still got you in her pocket.

[bitebenot]

I'm trying to stay away but remember; we're talking about my Wife still so that vow part of me is still there. I just need to let her "worry" or "realize."

 

Also I'm not sure if she likes to play poker to be honest. In our four years together I never seen her request to play it once or play it at all. There is always a chance, but I find it very very very unlikely she is bluffing me.

 

Yes it is your wife,and the final decision in this drama is always yours.

You know whats the best for you and her.Just do it wisely,take the time to think before reacting to any new event.You got all the tools you need here.

[anon12]

I never saw something like that before ! This is very unique ! She really took you for a ride ! That relationship cant be salvaged anymore. Sorry about that,i really wanted you to have success in getting her back.That experience will serve you for a lifetime,thats the positive side of it.You do deserve a lot better.Now its time for healing and forget her totaly and never talk to her again.Good luck to you,your a good man.

 

Thanks, not gonna be easy, im obessing that shes not coming back, because of other peoples actions not her own, shes turned into a very weak person, and shes too preocupied on other peoples opinions.

 

Cant believe she asked me to wait while shes off with someone else..

Always going to think, what if..

[FoundYet]

Day 3 and i might break...because I really want to know.

FB was our thing. We always talked there, its why I'm so scared of it and trying to avoid it so much..but I want to know if he finally took our pictures down. I took mine all down awhile ago but his were up still three days ago but I still dont want to break but I want to know. I feel like it would help close more, but also it might hurt more too. I actually want to ask a friend to go and look for me because maybe it will be less hurtful. I hate this. Day time I seem to do fine but as the day turns into night I start thinking of doing stupid things like looking him up or messaging him. It's such a small thing...

[MandyJade]

Day 2.

Today was not so bad because I had an exam. Tomorrow won't be bad either because I have another one. I am afraid that the loneliness will hit when I have a week off afterwards. But for today there has been NC.