klafeoj Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 I think she believes this is supposed to be a vengeance thing and not me moving on. Link to comment
LostDavid Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 I think she believes this is supposed to be a vengeance thing and not me moving on. Dating other people for vengeance is always bad juju. Link to comment
FoundYet Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 Frick... Day 1... again I went and looked him up. I wanted to know if the pictures were taken down. I was thinking and hoping it would give me more closure if they had been. That I was really out of his mind. I wanted to know so badly. It was so scary to do it. But the pictures are still there. My nerves instantly disappeared but a sigh of relief came over me. I don't think that's a good thing cause it's giving me a false sense of hope. crap. stupid. Link to comment
Snowgrrl83 Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 Here I am again, lying in my bed awake before my alarm goes off at 6:30 AM. I just want to yell at him for all the terrible things he did to me. I'm getting definit anxiety as I'm sure I'll run into him at the local resort this weekend. I need to really force myself to maintain NC. Link to comment
klafeoj Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 Dating other people for vengeance is always bad juju. Well i meant that she thinks me doing NC is for vengeance not her dating the other guy. I don't know why she is dating the other guy... she doesn't think of it as a rebound. She tells everyone that she got over me months ago and that she has already moved on. Link to comment
Snowgrrl83 Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 My plan for the resort... since I'm likely to run into him! Rules for myself: - Do not mention anything about him going to see his ex... or anything about his ex even existing. - Do not invite him anywhere... - If I run into him, simply be friendly, say hello, and go mind my own business and meet up with the girls or have friendly conversations with guys...all while smiling Link to comment
Snowgrrl83 Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 anon- i wouldnt consider it contact. Just dont reply to her thank you. Link to comment
anon12 Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 I didnt , i dont plan to respond to anything, even "I want you back". Two chances is more than enough. Link to comment
Snowgrrl83 Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 I agree. I gave my ex enough chances too. Link to comment
LostDavid Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 Day 1 I have failed myself and feel bad but at the same time I feel great. Had to force and break the NC as I had to ensure my prior agreement for the Divorce was changed based on her jealousy words she said in her message to me on the FB-alike site (quoting and insulting a part of my profile). I feel that shouldn't count as breaking NC however she replied and told me she seen I looked at her profile (it was honestly a mistake when I clicked her profile gah), she wrote me a message at 1pm then quote "went to bed and four hours later I got up and stormed out to the living room and changed my profile." Told me in an e-mail she kept her account logged on to see when I'd look at it (yeah ok) - for if that was the case she wouldn't have got so upset when I did mistakenly look. Also in the same e-mail she mentioned she doesn't have a life and has nothing else to do but get on stupid sites like [the one mentioned above-ommited the name] to and do tests/questions there. Even gave me a wonderful signature of "goodbye a**hole, thanks for making me cry myself to sleep yet again last night" Honestly it feels like she is trying very, very hard for some type of attention. Trying to guilt trip me twice in one e-mail ... I don't know if I should feel bad and if she is caving. I would go with she is caving or just trying very hard to get some type of confirmation that I still care. However I do know that I feel better now as odd as that sounds. Knowing she would act like this and be like this to me after I was sweet to her, kind and respectful for her sake when she was hurting and kept our prior Divorce e-mails emotionless and as peaceful as possible. So much for being the nice guy and ignoring my feelings of closure for her sake Link to comment
bitebenot Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 Darn,shes hurt,just leave her alone ! You deserve to have her bashing you. You dont know much about women ! Your pushing her over the edge ! Dont communicate or spy on her.You said you did it by mistake..was it a mistake or were you just curious a litle ? You are losing your chance to win her back.Now you need a real miracle. Link to comment
LostDavid Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 Darn,shes hurt,just leave her alone ! You deserve to have her bashing you. You dont know much about women ! Your pushing her over the edge ! Dont communicate or spy on her.You said you did it by mistake..was it a mistake or were you just curious a litle ? You are losing your chance to win her back.Now you need a real miracle. Really not sure how I deserve her to be bashing me, much less not sure how I'm pushing her over the edge. I had to make contact to ensure I didn't pay for the debt (someone mentioned I shouldn't either, cough) but not to point fingers. I did mistakenly look at her profile, and no I wasn't curious at all. Perhaps I am losing my chance to win her back and need a real miracle, but on the flip side: she has done such things like this before out of hate, jealously, spite just to wind me up and get a reaction so I honestly do feel that is what she is doing this time with those comments. Especially the quoting my profile and gutting hers after I looked at something she so carefully was "leaving online to see if I looked." Honestly at this point, I'm not even sure if I want her back as I said. I'm seeing a side of her that I'm glad I got away from. I litterally gave up my life to go be with her in Switzerland, even gave up my own personal closure by having answers I wanted to know about answered, not answered for her sake. Feeling a lot better now that this happened also. Easier to see her true colors and I'm not exactly liking the person I fell in love with. Link to comment
klafeoj Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 i just need to remember that just because she misses me and misses talking to me does not mean she's in love with me... after she left and got with that new guy, i got the "I will never have feelings for you as a boyfriend ever again". So just because she's desperate for attention doesn't mean she has romantic feelings at all... sad but true. Link to comment
bitebenot Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 i just need to remember that just because she misses me and misses talking to me does not mean she's in love with me... after she left and got with that new guy, i got the "I will never have feelings for you as a boyfriend ever again". So just because she's desperate for attention doesn't mean she has romantic feelings at all... sad but true. Its not rare for a women to say that under frustrations..she could also regret her decision.When a women misses the ex a lot,sometimes love comes to the surface,it does happen ! Time will tell,shouldnt take long in your case. If shes in a rebound relationship,shes always comparing her new dude to the ex.Maybe the new dude is not up to the task ! If you were better than him,well shes not blind and will see it. Link to comment
FoundYet Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Going into Day 2 I sleep all day and when I wake I stare out the window then doze off then I'm here reading all night. I finally got up in the evening and went got something to eat, as I've lost 10 pounds already, but as I was driving I thought I saw his car and started crying all over. crap...but at least I ate something more then a glass of orange juice. And I didn't go look him up. Millimeter steps. Link to comment
klafeoj Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Day 17. All quiet for the last two days... Link to comment
bitebenot Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Going into Day 2 I sleep all day and when I wake I stare out the window then doze off then I'm here reading all night. I finally got up in the evening and went got something to eat, as I've lost 10 pounds already, but as I was driving I thought I saw his car and started crying all over. crap...but at least I ate something more then a glass of orange juice. And I didn't go look him up. Millimeter steps. The first month is real hard,you have to keep pushing yourself for everything. Myself lost 25 pounds in 5 weeks.After a month an a half,you start healing well.You dont cry anymore after 2 weeks..if it can make you feel better,at 3 months you will have control of your emotions again.Almost 4 months for me now,what a difference ! I can laugh again,go out and meet people,dont think of the ex so much..my brain is getting the message,shes not part of my life anymore,shes just another stranger among many. So be patient,stay busy and first of all,EAT ! Post your emotions here,it will help you a lot,Talk to people here,they are willing to support you as much as you need it. Link to comment
syxx87 Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Day 19 Woke up this morning and thought of the ex but had an indifferent attitude about her. Was feeling good most of today until I got on facebook and seen her status. It wasnt anything heartbreaking but I dont want to see anything about her at all right now. Just her stating about how she is doing stuff and having fun and the fact that it is without me is a mild setback. Does anybody know how to take someone off of their news feeds? I had it setup where I couldnt see anything of hers but now, it wont work and I see all her wall posts and status update again now. I need to talk to the new girl to numb the pain Link to comment
Hobbes Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Day 23478998374958794 No longer a challenge, it's just fun now. Link to comment
JonasWaingaro Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Day 23478998374958794 No longer a challenge, it's just fun now. haha =p Funny Hobbes. =) Let's see I haven't posted in this thread in ages. It's right around 120days since 'contact'. If you could call what I got contact. Though my reply was contact and ignored. Lovely. Well okay, I did send a christmas card. But how can I count something that was put into a shredder unread as contact?! Exactly, I don't. Hang in there everyone. Link to comment
CuZiNeeDYoU Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Day 80, i think im starting to see why she hasnt tried contact since i ignored her last attempt.... I mean what do u say after all weve been through, after 4 years of pain sadness, happiness, disapointment, joy, bliss....theres nothing left to say, theres no room for small talk... I guess one day we will reconect but for now there is much healing to do on both sides Link to comment
kvb10 Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Wow you all are inspirational!! I hope to take the NC challenge soon... but I don't think I'm ready just yet. Link to comment
kvb10 Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Day 19 Woke up this morning and thought of the ex but had an indifferent attitude about her. Was feeling good most of today until I got on facebook and seen her status. It wasnt anything heartbreaking but I dont want to see anything about her at all right now. Just her stating about how she is doing stuff and having fun and the fact that it is without me is a mild setback. Does anybody know how to take someone off of their news feeds? I had it setup where I couldnt see anything of hers but now, it wont work and I see all her wall posts and status update again now. I need to talk to the new girl to numb the pain There should be a "hide" button next to the status update. Congrats on 19 days!!! Link to comment
bitebenot Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 In one week it will be 4 months,I'm still very pissed at her for replacing me 3 days before i was dumped.Will never see or talk to her again.Still miss her a lot,a void that will take time to fill up.I just wonder if she misses me at times or im just a dream to her.5 years down the drain...how can someone can become so cruel after a break-up.I still love my ex b****.No class or whatsoever.When you think that much love was unbreakable,big surprise ! Wake up to a nightmare one day, one that wont die.My relationship was salvageable but she preferred another f*** dude instead.I just hate that women. Link to comment
anon12 Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Day 3, heard more * * * * from random people i dont know, about how they were argueing non stop, and he went home and trashed his room infront of her... What the ... Like you bitebenot, im pissed at her, but at what shes doing to herself now, not what she did to me. Dont really get it. Thing is, i recon she'll be back in a few weeks. But how am i ever supposed to trust her again. Hate these mood swings Link to comment
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