Cat76 Posted May 26, 2009 Share Posted May 26, 2009 Day 29 Almost there. I would have thought I would be feeling a bit better at this stage. I guess I am to the extent that he has less of a monopoly on my mind so the pain is less frequent. But when the pain comes it can still hurt as much. Well done Jellybaby, you've done good Are you going to have a 30 day party? Link to comment
imjgh Posted May 26, 2009 Share Posted May 26, 2009 jellybaby41, Thanks, you are awesome. Simple statement.... yet we forget sometimes. hang in there kips..... focus on that which is good....be thankful you have a day with health...there are many who would gladly change places with you or i....never give up Link to comment
Tanzi Posted May 26, 2009 Share Posted May 26, 2009 Well done Jellybaby, you've done good Are you going to have a 30 day party? Ha ha yeah I feel like having a party. I think we should all have a party!! I have only ever got as far as 2 weeks before. Feeling pretty good about it but I am missing the hell out of him. Link to comment
Ixtapa Posted May 26, 2009 Share Posted May 26, 2009 Day 50 !!! 10 more days and I will be done with the challenge. Still thinking of him a lot but it doesnt hurt anymore....great progress Link to comment
Tanzi Posted May 26, 2009 Share Posted May 26, 2009 jellybaby41, Thanks, you are awesome. Simple statement.... yet we forget sometimes. We forget a lot of times and I do too. I haven't called or text this time but this is out of fear of rejection more than anything. I still miss him like mad but I know I am doing this for the right reason ... for me and that is something I have to constantly remind myself, but, hell, this is hard sometimes isn't it? Link to comment
jarias2311 Posted May 26, 2009 Share Posted May 26, 2009 Day 2 of NC Feeling really crappy today. I am doing all the right things since I have been through this before. I am hanging out with friends, trying to get myself out of the house but still I feel so much pain that I dont know what to do. I miss her so much and I want to contact her so badly but I know I shouldnt. Even right now she is all I can think about. She was my bestfriend and we talked all the time. Now to have to ACT like she doesnt exist is just weird to me. I hope this starts to get better because I cant take much more I just wish I knew how she was feeling.. Link to comment
imjgh Posted May 26, 2009 Share Posted May 26, 2009 Day 2 of NC Feeling really crappy today. I am doing all the right things since I have been through this before. I am hanging out with friends, trying to get myself out of the house but still I feel so much pain that I dont know what to do. I miss her so much and I want to contact her so badly but I know I shouldnt. Even right now she is all I can think about. She was my bestfriend and we talked all the time. Now to have to ACT like she doesnt exist is just weird to me. I hope this starts to get better because I cant take much more I just wish I knew how she was feeling.. best to you jarias...i would advise focusing on someone or something else. the faster the better...otherwise you will get caught up on the current that takes you down daily....move on and find someone you can be happy with... Link to comment
jarias2311 Posted May 26, 2009 Share Posted May 26, 2009 best to you jarias...i would advise focusing on someone or something else. the faster the better...otherwise you will get caught up on the current that takes you down daily....move on and find someone you can be happy with... How can I move on when I feel in my heart that this girl is the 1 for me? Theres just something about her that makes me feel like no matter what happens, everything will work itself out between us.. Link to comment
imjgh Posted May 26, 2009 Share Posted May 26, 2009 How can I move on when I feel in my heart that this girl is the 1 for me? Theres just something about her that makes me feel like no matter what happens, everything will work itself out between us.. jarias, i understand where you are at. i was there myself till today...she contacted me this morning and we have exchanged a text or two BUT i believe it's over... i felt exactly the way you do, until this afternoon. i thought she was my destiny. the problem with that thinking is it doesn't consider the feelings of the other person. you can't will someone to have feelings for you. perhaps i'm mistaken and my girl(if i can still call her that) still loves me but i am having serious doubts right now. maybe just maybe your girl doesn't feel the same as you. i know i certainly felt the way you do....but honestly, if they don't want to be with you and i it's not going to happen my friend. i sincerely hope it works out for both of us, hell for everyone on this site, but the fact is most of us won't make this present relationship go. i am preparing myself for tomorrow because i can tell you and everyone else on this site that i am a heck of a guy and i deserve a very special lady in my life. i need to go find her, when the time is right...maybe she is the one i thought she is but if not, i will go find her. good luck Link to comment
CanesGirl85 Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 Broke my NC today...wanted to see him so bad...and didnt mean to. Went to drop his sister off a card, was told he wasnt there and he WAS. Invited him to watch a hockey game, he acted disinterested, even though just last week, he was asking me for "dates to see where things head" aka...have his cake and eat it too because he did nothing to make me feel secure or wanted unless he wanted to get laid or do it all on HIS terms, not caring for my feelings. So he was disinterested, said maybe, to which I replied nevermind, he could forget it, and that I didnt know why I had asked him anyways, as it was clear he wanted nothing to do with me and couldnt give two craps. That was HARD as I have never ever said a half mean thing to him...but I was so hurt and fed up. He's done playing with my heart for the time being so he's going to act like he doesn't need me...okay. So now I blocked his cell phone and erased him from my contacts, and I have to distance myself away from his family too, because I feel as if they will never understand my side and how much I have hurt anyway. Gosh this is the worst... So I begin again...strict NC starting tomorrow. PLEASE let me be resilient this time! Though I think it should be rather easy knowing he's selfish and doesn't care for me for sure now anyways. I hope someone breaks his heart as he has broken mine. I feel bad saying that but I am a mess right now. Any advice to carry out NC if he DOES try to visit me or call me under someone else's phone? I hate this and just want to heal. Link to comment
pdoog Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 I know how you feel I just want to heal to but my mind wont let me. Link to comment
stargirl1980 Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 Dammit. Yesterday (Monday) would've been Day 6 for me...but around 9pm I broke, and txted him. All I said was "Hope you had a pretty good Memorial Day weekend. It gave me a chance to catch up on my reading and watch a few movies." I don't know why I did it. He never answers me, and he didn't answer this time either. It's been a month since he's talked to me...and I guess I just have to except that it's over forever. He didn't care about me, and he never will. But it hurts so badly, and I keep hoping that one day, the phone will ring. But...I guess I have to get over it. Link to comment
lionquack Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 DAY 12 Still not broken NC. Saw her yesterday (we live so close - 10-15 seconds away) She did not see me though. Its hot int he Uk at the moment (surprisingly ). She looked hot. Damn I miss her dearly. Was reminsicing of our passionate nights of making love last night. Still have not replied to her text and do not intend to. Deleted her number so I dont. All in all its not getting much easier for me personally. I though it would be. I think I need to be with someone else to take my mind off her. I wonder if she thinks of me as much as I think of her and miss her.......... Link to comment
imjgh Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 ok, long story for those that have been following... 30 days ago she wanted time... contacted me yesterday...we finally talked last night. there is good news and bad news. she will be moving 1,500 miles away up to virginia, the move will happen almost immediately. this is all about two ill parents. she still loves me but doesn't want to try a long distance because of what all is going on. i want to try ld because i still love her, more now than a month ago. she is hesitant, thinking we won't make it so why put off the inevitable. i know it will be challenging BUT why can't we try. 40 years from now we would both regret not having tried let's at least attempt it i say... 5 weeks ago i would not have even wanted to try but something changed in the last 30 days. i feel we can and will do this...the ld that is. there is so much more to this and i realize this is not the proper forum to share so i will probably take this over to the ld list... i thank you for the many of you who have shared and helped. those of you who have contacted me a special thanks to you. i can honestly say i don't know that i would have been able to make it to this point had it not been for you all. having a place to post helped to keep me sane....well as sane as i can be that is it's the end in some respects for my girl and i...yes she is still my girl....i do know that what we had was real...i also know it's still there, we'll just have to work hard to keep it going. my feeling in my heart is that we can and will make this work. just my 6th sense but it has been right so far but the task won't be easy but thenagain, when is it ever easy? it's kind of like mining for gold, sometimes it's right there to be found but most of the time you really have to work hard to mine it. love is like that i guess.... i will say nc isn't about them, it's about you...don't do nc to try and manipulate the other person, do it for yourself, so you can prepare yourself for your futures, with or without that other person in your life. best of luck to all... Link to comment
imjgh Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 All in all its not getting much easier for me personally. I though it would be. I think I need to be with someone else to take my mind off her. I wonder if she thinks of me as much as I think of her and miss her.......... yes she thinks of you lion... it is like a roller coaster, some days up and some down...over the long haul it does get easier...but it's never easy. you say you need to be with someone else, do you mean a friend or someone to replace her with? highly suggest you don't go out and find another girl just to replace her....that's not fair to the new girl....i think we all should take the high road, what goes around comes around back to us... hang in there... Link to comment
lionquack Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 yes she thinks of you lion... it is like a roller coaster, some days up and some down...over the long haul it does get easier...but it's never easy. you say you need to be with someone else, do you mean a friend or someone to replace her with? highly suggest you don't go out and find another girl just to replace her....that's not fair to the new girl....i think we all should take the high road, what goes around comes around back to us... hang in there... Thanks for your kind words. I meant a new girlfiriend to rpelace her seems my best option for me. I am fine when i am busy as it take smy mind off her but when I am alone she jumps into my mind. The way we looked at each other, the way her soft blonde hair felt, her smell, her beautiful skin. Gosh i miss her it does'nt help that I saw her yesterday looking damn hot. its unaviodable though!! I feel like texting her back right now thats why I am posting on here.... Link to comment
pdoog Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 Day 51. I have been finding myself lately thinking a lot more about her then usual and letting it get me down. I think I am still grieving the loss of the only person that ever REALLY made me HAPPY. This feeling really hurts and I am scared that it will never go away because I am holding onto it, I hold on to it because I am afraid of truly letting go of my feelings and thoughts and memories of her. Bah this is tougher then I expected. Link to comment
Tanzi Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 Day 30 I wished that I could rejoice over my 30 days but I don't much feel like it. I feel like I am going backwards again. Like it is just sinking in that this is real ... that I will never see or hear from him again and it is hurting. What are we meant to feel at 30 days? Spurred on by our success to do another 30? Heres to the next 30 I guess. I hope I feel better by then that I do right now. Link to comment
k1k1 Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 Day6 - still no response from her Well tonight I was looking at getting a new car. I remember when she said to me once "They day you get a new car is the day I leave you". And that morning I decided to sell the car, and by coincidence, I was dumped that night. Well, been doing a bit of research online and its put my mind off her alot. I have all access to her emails, facebook bank accounts etc (I have all her passwords). Tempted to take a look at them as I feel so great tonight. In fact, Im in quite a healed mood tonight - because Iv been car shopping sort of.. But I wont. In fact as Im typing this those feelings are starting to come back I dont feel like I want to heal and just forget about it. I was contemplating just calling her up and going "lets just be friends" Link to comment
imjgh Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 Day 30 I wished that I could rejoice over my 30 days but I don't much feel like it. I feel like I am going backwards again. Like it is just sinking in that this is real ... that I will never see or hear from him again and it is hurting. What are we meant to feel at 30 days? Spurred on by our success to do another 30? Heres to the next 30 I guess. I hope I feel better by then that I do right now. i don't know girl...nobody said time makes it easy...i do think each day gets a little less difficult, easier if you will. but easy? no.... YOU know i'm thinking of you...you have been so supportive to me...even with all that is going on in my life i am thankful.... hang in there my bb ;-) Link to comment
Tanzi Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 YOU know i'm thinking of you...you have been so supportive to me...even with all that is going on in my life i am thankful.... Back atcha TC Link to comment
Cheeks18 Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 Starting over agian Day 1, things were going great and everything bad happened last night and today I guess, we were talking hanging out and seemed like something was happening. Anyways I got a email this mornin and she wanted me to come over and talk, I asked about what, she said I am sorry but I have been leading you on and I am sorry for breaking the no contact last time but I think its best for us right now so we can both move on because she know for a fact she doesnt want to be with me right now becuase she believes we will go down the same road as last time, and doesnt believe that I have changed in any way shape or form. She said she would call if she ever wanted to try and fix things and get back together but that would be the only reason she would call, she said she wont ever lead me on ever again and she is sooooo sorrrrryyyy. Anyways im relieved finally an answer no grey area she dont want me, I can accept that and if she calls one day thats awesome but I need to move on and not dwell on that. question. WHy did she decied so suddenly???? Like out of no where?? We were doing better??? Just wondering. So im upset but I got this!!! Link to comment
Qut81 Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 Day 1....Im gonna be strong this time. Link to comment
lionquack Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 Day 1....Im gonna be strong this time. you can do it..trust me. If I can you can. There are many many others in the same boat. Link to comment
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