mfan Posted January 9, 2009 Share Posted January 9, 2009 I wonder if you would mind helping me with the following question. Which two of the following changes would make the biggest improvement in my attractiveness to women? I can't do them all - Doing all of the below would be such a chore that it's simply not worth the trouble to me. I'd like to pick a couple that would have the most effect. 1. Shaving every day (instead of every 3-4 days) 2. Whitening my teeth which are slightly yellow due to coffee drinking 3. Getting neat, short haircuts every 2-3 weeks (instead of waiting a month and a half until it's overgrown and has cowlicks and curls up over my ears 4. Losing 20 pounds (going from 205 to 185 pounds - note, I'm 5'11") 5. Working out (I have a big pot belly right now - all my flab is localized there. No visible arm muscles. But I'm not lethargic, I have plenty of energy for long distance fast walking) 6. Shampooing my hair every day instead of every several days. Thanks in advance for your advice. I appreciate your help. Hygiene is a problem for me because I find it hard to stand the repetitiveness and mind-numbing maintenance of the whole thing. -mfan Link to comment
laisla Posted January 9, 2009 Share Posted January 9, 2009 why can't you shampoo your hair and shave every day? it's such a small thing to do. you can't be that lazy now. take care of yourself. if i knew a guy who didn't shampoo for days i'd find it gross. those are the small things...then start tackling the big issues....lose the weight. start working out. #4 and 5 go together. and then whiten your teeth. all you'd have left is to cut your hair more often (for whatever look you go for). Link to comment
alli Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I'll put them in order of precedence, IMO. Top thing being most important: 5 4 2 1 6- (unless your hair gets greasy, in that case bump it up 2 notches) 3 Link to comment
alli Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 But you really should bathe everyday, to include shampooing your hair, and shave every other day. Link to comment
JeckyllNHyde Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 1. Shaving every day (instead of every 3-4 days) Yes. Big difference usually. edit to add: alli is right.. shaving every other day is better, b/c i think otherwise skin can get irritated sometimes. 2. Whitening my teeth which are slightly yellow due to coffee drinking If they are noticably yellow, I say do this too. this is really just a one time thing. or something you'll need to do for a few weeks till you see the results. get whitening toothpaste and mouthwash. easy! 3. Getting neat, short haircuts every 2-3 weeks (instead of waiting a month and a half until it's overgrown and has cowlicks and curls up over my ears A guy's hair is one of the first things that make him look unkept, along with not shaving and how he dresses. what's so hard about getting a haircut? 4. Losing 20 pounds (going from 205 to 185 pounds - note, I'm 5'11") If you can lose it, do so. 5. Working out (I have a big pot belly right now - all my flab is localized there. No visible arm muscles. But I'm not lethargic, I have plenty of energy for long distance fast walking) when it comes to excersize, it's good for your health too. not just appearance. 6. Shampooing my hair every day instead of every several days. i shampoo every few (3) days. but i have long hair. i think twice a week is enough? or 3x. just as soon as you can tell it's dirty. remember that you sweat too and your scalp can get oily. not a good sight/smell. as la isla said: what's the big deal about keeping up your hygene and appearance. what if you get married someday or are in a relationship. will u let yourself go after a few months? Link to comment
savignon Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 Usually attitude is much more important and noticeable to a girl than looks and if you think it's a chore to keep up with yourself, that probably comes out where you can't see it. Link to comment
looking_up Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 do you shower everyday and just not shampoo? That would be fine, but if you only shower every 3 days thats a HUGE turn off - BO is the worst. I say 6, 5, and 4. Working out will help you stay healthy and feel good as well as be more attractive, the other items are superficial and their importance will depend on each girl individually. Example - If you hate spending money and time on haircuts you probably don't want a girl who gets her hair done every week either. Link to comment
doyathink Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 Honestly...I think you should do all 6 of them. How hard is it to look your best all the time? If you were in a relationship for awhile, this just shows how you would let yourself go...and that doesn't make for a lasting relationship. Link to comment
jessmichelle Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 Honestly, every woman has different opinions on what they find attractive in men. Such as with the shaving, some may find it very sexy for a man to have a scruffy appearance while others may think of it as unkempt. I think you should just go for the look you want and I'm sure you'll attract women. But I do find it humorous you think 6 things are to many,you are lucky to be a man Link to comment
alli Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I don't like whitening my teeth because my teeth are sensitive to it & it actually hurts a lot. Plus you get that white glare & people can tell its from whitening them. I drink coffee a lot too, just brush your teeth afterward & flossing daily is even more important. Dental hygiene is more important than making them look artificially white. Link to comment
shikashika Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 What would make you more attractive is not not be so lazy. All those things are important. It's not a matter of brushing your teeth or shampooing your hair (you don't need to get it cut every 3 weeks) but really, your problem sounds like your laziness. You need to work on that first. Link to comment
COtuner Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 shampoo first, haircuts second in my opinion Link to comment
Stars_n_Guitars Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 why don't you do all of these? I think you are sure they are a problem for you. Link to comment
heloladies21 Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 A confusing post, you're basically saying "how little can I get away with doing"...It doesn't work that way. If you really want to get women intereted in you, do them all. Think up other things you can fix about yourself and do those too. It's going to take a radical change for you to live the life you seem to desire. All you gotta do is ask yourself how important this is to you. Link to comment
laisla Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 Usually attitude is much more important and noticeable to a girl than looks and if you think it's a chore to keep up with yourself, that probably comes out where you can't see it. that is true, but if a person talks to me who has really bad hygiene i wouldn't care about his personality. Link to comment
savignon Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 Originally Posted by savignon Usually attitude is much more important and noticeable to a girl than looks and if you think it's a chore to keep up with yourself, that probably comes out where you can't see it. that is true, but if a person talks to me who has really bad hygiene i wouldn't care about his personality. That's what I meant....that he's not having a problem attracting girls b/c of his looks...it's b/c his attitude of "i can't be bothered" is probably very evident which is a turnoff. Link to comment
sunday13 Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 All of the things you mentioned are good. Personally, though, depending on how fast your facial hair grows, every other day is ok. I prefer a slightly scruffy look. But then again, it depends on how you dress and present yourself in the other areas. I don't see how doing everything you mentioned is a chore. Hygiene is extremely important to women. You attract what you put out. If hygiene to you isn't important, you will attract women who don't want to take the time to look their best as well. If you want to attract women who take the time to look nice, you need to put the time in as well. I would say though, working out/losing weight and whitening your teeth are two ways that can drastically improve your appearance, though. Link to comment
Bartok Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 On the hair thing - unless you absolutely cannot afford it, try to get a cut before it gets too long. If you have longer hair, you can go longer - if you have shorter hair, you have to get one every couple of weeks to keep up. Shampooing depends on whether your hair gets greasy or not. I shampoo every other day, and it works fine for my hair - if I do it EVERY day I actually start looking worse. And working out - yes, do it! It's one of the biggest confidence boosters in the world. You'll feel better and look better, it's just a win-win all around. Shaving depends on how fast your facial hair grows and how close a shave you actually get. When I use a mach3, I have to shave every day. When I have time to treat myself to a good shave with an old DE razor, I can get away with every two days. Teeth thing depends on how yellow they are, but it doesn't take much effort to just get whitening toothpaste or those little strip things. I've never really bothered, but now that you mention it, I might just try it out soon. Link to comment
mfan Posted January 10, 2009 Author Share Posted January 10, 2009 I appreciate your honest advice. Most days I hardly see any people to whom I care about presenting a perfectly clean appearance, and that makes it harder to do all these things (I feel like what's the point) but now and then I happen to meet someone pretty but it's a shame to be yucky looking on that particular day. Link to comment
JeckyllNHyde Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I appreciate your honest advice. Most days I hardly see any people to whom I care about presenting a perfectly clean appearance, and that makes it harder to do all these things (I feel like what's the point) but now and then I happen to meet someone pretty but it's a shame to be yucky looking on that particular day. yea. that's one reason. you could miss out on a nice date just b/c of not looking presentable/clean. but also..i mentioned it before: what if ur in a relationship after the whole dating stage? it's worth permanently keeping up with appearances and making it a habit.. i bet u wouldnt want your other half (someday) just letting herself go b/c she is lazy... just trying to give some perspective. Link to comment
RedWingsFan Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I'll be straightforward and say that this sounds pathetic. Do you do the minimal amount of work in your career? In hobbies you partake in? In relationships with family and significant others? You sound lazy and that you enjoy taking the easy road. First, get in shape. Don't want a gym membership? Then get running shoes and go outside to run. You'll be in the best shape of your life. This will increase your confidence and self-esteem, and then, you might feel like doing more than what's necessary to get by. Take some pride in yourself. Link to comment
mfan Posted January 10, 2009 Author Share Posted January 10, 2009 So, to confirm: If there is a guy who is out of shape and also dirty, you all feel that getting into shape is more of an improvement than becoming clean. Wow. Link to comment
JeckyllNHyde Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 So, to confirm: If there is a guy who is out of shape and also dirty, you all feel that getting into shape is more of an improvement than becoming clean. Wow. i dont. if i had to pick i'd pick him to be clean. but at he same time letting himself go physically cant be too a good thing either. why not find balance? Link to comment
Bartok Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 So, to confirm: If there is a guy who is out of shape and also dirty, you all feel that getting into shape is more of an improvement than becoming clean. Wow. "You all feel"? Where did you get that idea? Just do everything you mentioned. Seriously. Link to comment
yellow_sweater Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 So, to confirm: If there is a guy who is out of shape and also dirty, you all feel that getting into shape is more of an improvement than becoming clean. Wow. If you want to put it that way, yes. I like a little scruff on a guy (rawr). I'm a little freaked out when people have Chicklet-style white teeth. I like guys with shaggy hair. And I personally don't use scented shampoos or anything, so I don't mind if your hair isn't squeaky clean (I have found that, in general, if you're a healthy person, you won't smell... then again, the hippy gene lives strong in me, so I might not be the "average" woman). There's a difference between being CLEAN and being overly scented and slathered with beauty products. My boyfriend washes with soap only, brushes his teeth, but doesn't really use deodorant or scented shampoos. He's plenty clean, but he's got shaggy hair and a shaggy beard. Make sense? In the end, I personally am not attracted to guys who are overweight. So, for me, that would by far make the biggest difference. Good luck YS Link to comment
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