What's worse in society, being an unattractive female or unattractive male?

[Lana0120]

I think you're right dietrying. It does seem to be men who do more of the initiating on those things. For a short time I tried one of those dating sites and got a lot of responses, without even a photo. Unfortunately, guys need to make the effort, if they want to get a lot of interest.

[annie24]

Let's keep this thread on topic and not use it as a platform to discuss your life and private issues!

[Luke Skywalker]

I think you're right dietrying. It does seem to be men who do more of the initiating on those things. For a short time I tried one of those dating sites and got a lot of responses, without even a photo. Unfortunately, guys need to make the effort, if they want to get a lot of interest.

 

That's just the point though. Unattractive girls have an easier time connecting with someone online, after all, they just pick and choose who they want to reply to. An unattractive guy may get no replies at all to the emails that he sends out.

 

Just the fact of who initiates what doesn't mean anything in itself when judging a system like that, reciprocity is what counts. It's possible for an unattractive guy to stay a while on an online system and simply not connect to anyone that meets his criteria for a length of time, while even an unattractive woman just picks and chooses.

Unless you are an attractive guy you wont even have the luxury of choice if choosing among a even a few interested women.

 

Online dating is not society though, it's a small part of people connecting to each other for dates and relationships, and given the skewed power balance on there, it's an exaggeration of most offline venues. In analogy, online dating is like going to a party where there is over 4 guys to every gal. Unless you are in a venue of either more fair ratios or where gals exceed the guys substantially, then this would be the result.

 

So, going back to the OP's question - it all depends on the specific gender ratios or power balance on a given situation which determines whether unattractive males or unattractive females have it more difficult.

[chelsey_c]

I think it's more difficult for women than men. In my experience women tend to look for strong personality traits that they want in a man while looking past physical attributes. At the same time many of the men I know base their opinions of women off of looks, and looks alone and personality comes later. It's nice when women and men can be the best of both worlds though. Being wonderful and kind with inner beauty that seems to seep out of their outer beauty---if you find that NEVER let it go!

[Taomagicdragon]

I think it's dead even. Both genders would like to feel attractive to someone, and really, everyone is attractive to someone, and most attractio nis on how you behave and carry yourself, not so much abotu how you look.

 

Think of it this way, find a pretty flower that smells lie a dead skunk isn't a flower you're gonna pick. You'd pick the flower that has a great aroma, not because of what its petals look like.