Would you be ok with your gf dancing with other guys in a club?

[Batya33]

I think there's a big difference between going out to a club and dancing one on one with people you've just met when your SO isn't there and in your daily life making new friends who happen to be of the opposite sex. In the first case it's not about making friends - it's about physical contact in a sexually charged atmosphere where you're pretending to be available or giving the impression of being available - in the second case it's simply living your life and interacting with people who might be of the opposite sex and who you might have things in common with.

 

In the latter case I'd be happy if my SO was making new friends (which he regularly does- both women and men although typically in a professional context). In an individual case it might be problematic, if she was attracted to him or behaved disrespectfully to me but if that was the case my SO would not want to be friends with her anyway.

[RayKay]

So it is okay for a man's gf to come in contact with another man's genitals (grinding) as long as they are just dancing as friends?

 

I don't believe I said that at all, nor was that the context I put it it.

 

You took the words right out of their context entirely which loses the entire meaning...that is like if I took your sentence above and just quoted: it is okay for a man's gf to come in contact with another man's genitals (grinding) as long as they are just dancing as friends. See how removing it from being a question changes the entire tone?

 

This is actually what I said:

 

 

Dancing in a club....depends on the circumstances....I don't think grinding with other men is acceptable but if she is just dancing with friends and having a good time, okay

 

I think most people would realize from that that when I say "dancing" and say "I don't think grinding with other men is acceptable" I am clearly saying it is not okay to be grinding with other men whether they are friends or not but that people can go out dancing without engaging in what I consider inappropriate behaviour (like grinding). I am able to dance with friends without doing things that would be disrespectful to my partner.

[amtjrtcet]

In the latter case I'd be happy if my SO was making new friends (which he regularly does- both women and men although typically in a professional context). In an individual case it might be problematic, if she was attracted to him or behaved disrespectfully to me but if that was the case my SO would not want to be friends with her anyway.

 

Professional I wouldn't and don't have a problem with it. But just to go out and meet another female and get her number, HELL NO

[i_love_chocolate]

When I said dancing in a club, I didn't mean grinding, HELL NO. I just wish she would only have female friends. Her male friends are always trying to get into her pants. I don't care what she tells me. I know it. I would have not had a problem with her male friends if they were married, in a relationship or gay. But straight single guys? Come on ... no straight single guy can just be "friends" with a very attractive girl. Guys don't you think so?

[amtjrtcet]

When I said dancing in a club, I didn't mean grinding, HELL NO. I just wish she would only have female friends. Her male friends are always trying to get into her pants. I don't care what she tells me. I know it. I would have not had a problem with her male friends if they were married, in a relationship or gay. But straight single guys? Come on ... no straight single guy can just be "friends" with a very attractive girl. Guys don't you think so?

 

I think so. You have every right to be upset or angry.

[annie24]

When I said dancing in a club, I didn't mean grinding, HELL NO. I just wish she would only have female friends. Her male friends are always trying to get into her pants. I don't care what she tells me. I know it. I would have not had a problem with her male friends if they were married, in a relationship or gay. But straight single guys? Come on ... no straight single guy can just be "friends" with a very attractive girl. Guys don't you think so?

 

 

I have single male friends who are just friends, so it is possible.

[Batya33]

I have single male friends who are just friends, so it is possible.

 

Same here and, anyway, for many people it makes no difference whether they are married or not as far as whether they are attracted to a single woman. If her "friends" are constantly hitting on her then they are not true friends because they are not being respectful of her relationship. Of course she has to remind them the first time it happens that it cannot happen again.

[Bunney]

i_love_chocolate, what about asking your girlfriend how she would feel if the situation was reversed? Would she mind if you went to a club, danced with girls and exchanged number with them? Ask her that.

[JadedStar]

Same here and, anyway, for many people it makes no difference whether they are married or not as far as whether they are attracted to a single woman. If her "friends" are constantly hitting on her then they are not true friends because they are not being respectful of her relationship. Of course she has to remind them the first time it happens that it cannot happen again.

 

I agree. We all know many married men would not think twice about cheating and if a woman puts herself "out there" and gives off a vibe she is available even when in a relationship, many men will jump her like a hound dog.

 

Very big difference in male/female platonic friendships and grinding on one another in a club...and yes it is a VERY sexually charged atmosphere. the entire scene is geared towards sex and illicit behavior in my opinion. It is encouraged.

 

I LOVE to dance but can't say i really would want to go to nightclubs alone because I don't like getting hit on and guys trying to pick you up, and that is what happens everytime. Even when i have gone with my husband that happens! And i am 40 for crying out loud. if a 23 year old guy will try to pick me up, you can bet they will be trying to pick up your girl. But then again maybe some of the young ones like MILF's. ROFLMBO

[Elmer_The_Elephant]

I no how you feel because i'm like that with my bf!! I feel very paranoid about things like that! But i no that i can trust him and you should feel you cantrust her!! If she really loves you then she is telling the truth and would never do anything to hurt you.

[Sir Tristan CA]

okay, I can give first-hand advice on this one: no. She did it to me while at a conference in Berkeley. She told me about it, sure, but she still did it. BTW, I'm not talking about just casual dancing. I'm talking about grinding and freaking. The casual dancing I don't have ANY problems with. The freaking and really close sexual dancing though? Yeah, that's a problem.

 

The only reason I forgave her is that she's one of those sheltered girls that doesn't really understand that things like freaking are more for the guy's benefit than the girl's, and that dancing with a member of the opposite gender in general is considered flirting by most guys.

[Twistedwhispers]

I wouldnt stand for my boyfriend dancing with other girls in a club, and he knows it. we have had a discussion about this before and he has always said "why would i want to dance with another girl for?"

I dont think its ok to give your number out to a guy you meet in a club but if its an old school friend or something and not an ex i guess thats ok. x

[Kimber038]

dancing is one thing but to get phone numbers is a totally different thing. I would not be in a relatonship if my other half got another females number at a club. But thats just my opinion. It is disrespectful to you in my opinion. How would she like it if it was visa versa. If she dont have a problem with it then she is obviously more then friends with others.

[anagenema]

yeah, sounds wrong. unless it's outside the club, and someone u meet seems like the type of person u know u're gonna get on with for ever - I wouldn't give my number to anyone! unless work related or something...

[Thelovingone]

I would be horrified if that happen, and if that doesn't break us up there would be alot of problems. Yes I would be very jealous and upset.