waffle

I agree. Do not cold approach women.

Yes. This is the stuff that lasting relationships are made from.

So if she offers up the sex again all will be well?

There's nothing to approach. He doesn't want to be exclusive; if he did, he would do it. You basically want him to change what he wants but that doesn't work--that's not something you can negotiate. I'm not sure what about him seems like he'd be a good long-term partner or someone you could have a future with. He seems like a very poor candidate for that.

Or your ex-wife? Are you still in love with her?

A runner after they've won a race doesn't continue to keep running after crossing the finish line. There's no reason to. What would they be running towards?

Oh my word. It's hard to tell if this guy is being malicious/manipulative/abusive when he's telling you this. Some men really are just stupid.* At any rate, no, no one is going to suggest you keep seeing this guy. You know you deserve better, so definitely ditch this clown and move along. *before anyone gets their undies in a knot, yes women can be stupid too but this thread is not about comments made by a woman

I give the OP props for hanging in there on this thread, because the conclusion-jumping here is to the point where it has become an Olympic sport. But hey, at least she hasn't been told she's middle-aged yet. 😝

I remember having this convo with one of my guy friends a few years back and he was like "hell, Waffle, we men WISH women would use us for sex! That's our dream come true."

Let me know when scores of men start posting here saying that they've been pursued for sex despite telling her they wanting to wait, and once they gave in, and are now wondering if the woman was only after one thing (sex). I mean, it does happen especially if the guy is looking for Round Two (if he's not looking for a repeat he usually doesn't notice her absence), but it's rare and they almost never think they've been used for sex.

Simply put, women are thinking straight before sex, and men are not--they are on a mission. After sex it flips, men start thinking straight (due to a "mission accomplished" mindset which can be conscious or subconscious) and women are not--they are on a mission. He has no reason to pursue you anymore because it's, again, Mission Accomplished.

Same, word for word.

😲 If 28 is "almost middle-aged" then I guess several of us here better head down to the local nursing home and check ourselves in. OP, you are a young and single woman and as such you can do anything you want. I think your original question was how to tell if he's interested (interested in what, exactly, remains to be seen) without essentially making a fool of yourself. I don't know that there's a surefire way to do that so I'll just tell you that life itself is a series of learning experiences (often including making a fool of yourself) and when that happens you shake it off and move along. The world won't end. Life is for living, not sitting on the sidelines.

And that's where you say, "damn right you did and I wore you out. If you think you can keep up you can hit this again." Why are men the only ones allowed to be/talk sexual? OP, you want to teach this young pup a thing or two, I say go for it.

"I feel alone" was what stuck out to me. It sucks to be alone in a marriage. I remember my ex-husband, whenever I'd try to talk to him about anything, would say "that's YOUR problem." Notice I said EX husband. One of the hundreds of reasons why I divorced him. If I was going to basically be alone (single) then I wanted all the benefits of being single.

Oops, I missed the "married" part. 😞 So that would change what I think, obviously. The talking behind their backs was probably less about their ages than it was that. To the OP, I'd say enjoy the flirtation (if that's what it is, it sounds like it is anyway) and whatever happens, happens. Flirting doesn't always mean anything, sometimes people are just flirty in general, with everyone. It sounds like your question wasn't so much about the age difference as it was "is he flirting?" and I agree with the poster who said we can't know that . . . but it sure sounds like it!

A chance at what? He was only open to--at most--hanging out on a casual basis (yet made no moves to do that), and you are at the point where you want a relationship in your life, so I'll ask again . . . what were you going to give him a chance at? I think you did the right thing by having this discussion with him, and telling him See Ya. Now you know. Six months from now you won't even remember his name.

That's really sad because if this situation were reversed and a 32-year-old man was sleeping with an 18-year-old woman, he'd be getting high-fives.

If she suggests you switching seats, then she should pay. Pretty brazen of her to offer how to spend your money for you lol.

Women love to make others' shortcomings their fault. I would caution you against doing that.

Ditch the online scene because, as you're finding, fishing in that pond will only net you carp. If you're looking for men with social skills, try doing real-life things like joining clubs or singles groups or just generally being out-and-about. Living your life is the best way to meet other people who are living their lives.

I didn't need to read beyond this to know what you really think of her. It seems there are other men out there who rate her looks higher so I'd let her continue on with those guys. (and no, rating someone on a scale of 1 - 10 is not "facts". It's opinion)

This is extremely common and has been well-documented. Simply put, we're all "reachers" (I got that language from this article: https://theblog.okcupid.com/a-womans-advantage-82d5074dde2d under the heading The Truth About Messaging a little more than halfway down). We're in pursuit of those who are out of our league, so to speak, and those same people aren't pursuing us because 1) why would they? They don't have to pursue us when we're willing to pursue them, and 2) they're busy pursuing the ones out of their league. The ones pursuing us that we're not interested in, they are "reaching" for us because, again, we are out of their league. See how this goes? One male acquaintance of mine who, by his own admission, routinely chases women out of his league, explained it to me like this: he has nothing to lose by pursuing those women because he expects to be turned down. And if by some chance he actually happens to get the attention of one of them, then that would be a bonus and an unexpected and pleasant surprise. Ideally we'd all be interested in those "in our league" and they'd be interested in us. But first of all, those people can often be hard to identify especially at the outset, and second, human nature is to want something just a little bit better (or in some cases a lot better) than what we can actually have.

Where did you get this from??? Truth is, if you have to look for signs he is interested, and try and talk yourself into the fact (in this case fact means hope) that he is, then he is not. The only thing he sounds "interested" in is keeping you as a back-up plan in case he doesn't find anyone better online. You asked if this is normal behavior, it does seem to be normal (especially for the online scene) but that doesn't make it right or acceptable.

This is what I'm wondering too. So many reasons to dump him, pick a few and be done with the whole mess. There is no reason to put up with any of this unless for some reason you (you meaning OP) are one of those who needs to have a man, any man.