Luvly

Time has absolutely NOTHING to do with it. He may love you BUT (No matter how much you argue with me) you CAN'T make that choice for him to move further in the relationship. According to what you said he has already made the decision Not to move in with you. "i mean if a man says after 3 years oh im NOT ready to move in with you or to go further right now..." Lady, if this is what he said then leave it alone. This is one thing men don't like about us: they tell us something but we need to hear it ten different ways before it makes sense to us. According to what you said HE HAS MADE IT CLEAR THAT HE IS NOT INTERESTED IN MOVING IN WITH YOU OR FURTHERING THE RELATIONSHIP. what you wrote does not imply that he's not sure, or hasn't made up his mind- in fact he's made himself very clear. Also, living together mimicks marraige very closely. HE MAY FEEL LIKE HE'S BEING TIED DOWN. Marraige is commitment. He may want to keep his options open which is very difficult when you're living under the same roof weather you're married or not. He's making the right decision, and if you can't accept it then too bad. Moving in with someone is a big step, he knows EXACTLY what he's doing by not moving in with you.

I think that atleast for a week, you should try 2 get back with her, calling her all day and trying to get in contact with her. This will show her that you care and she'll get the feeling like "I still got it..." Then out the blue just ignore her. Don't call her, don't speak to her and don't make any effort to get in contact with her. Then she'll be like "How come he isn't paying any attention to me anymore." sowly but surely she'll start doing more and more things to hold your attention. It works like a charm- continue to do this and (if it's meant to be) you two will be back together in no time.

Either they don't have any self esteem and they're upset that there are people out there who look better than them. or They have too much self esteem and they don't want to accept the fact that someone could look better then them.

I agree with mskc0511. If sex is your only priority then you should really dump her and find someone who can satisfy your sexual needs. I know that sounds harsh, but if that's all you want from her- and your'e obviously not getting it-then you then you need leave her alone. Don't pressure her into having sex with you, because the more you push her, the more she's NOT going to have the desire to do it. The other thing is, you need 2 figure out why? she shuts down. I was raped as a child, and similarly I behave the same way she does. If you've ever watched the Antoine Fischer story that should help you the effects of sexual trauma as well. Furthermore, you should ask her if she were "traumatized" (raped, sexually abused, molested) as a child and see how she reacts to it. Lastly, you should understand that there is NOTHING you can do about it because it starts with her and she should be the one to make the change- but I guarentee you, you'll only be making it worse if you push her. It does NOT mean she's a lesbian, unless she shows any interst in females. Besides, you don't know weather or not she's shutting down sexually because you're a guy (which I doubt), or for some other reason- which is why I encourage you to find out if she has an underlying motive. GoodLuck[/code]