kamui

Hi people, For so long now i have been trying to get a gf, i sometimes wonder if im trying to hard (probably am). I'm 20 and i haven't even had a proper gf and i hate myself or even kissed properly (im way behind, im so sad ). I sometimes think that i set my standards to high when looking for a gf, i mean i have lots of girl friends. When i see a girl that i like, it's kind of hard to explain it's as if i know exactly what sort of personality they'll have i don't even have to speak to them. It's been a bit of a habit of mine, also i have been thinking whether this has been stopping me getting a gf. There is a girl that im intrested in at college, but college is closed and im not going to see her now for a couple of weeks. She knows my name and we have spoken a few times and i really do like her, she seems to fit everything that im looking for. I'm not the best when it comes to talking with girls, especially when i like them. It's just trying to find an excuse that isn't lame and obvious what i want, it's kind of hard. Then comes the other problem keep a conversation going, i know that you can do this by trying to show an intrest in what she likes but my confidence isn't exactly high, how do i boost myself? Can anyone offer any adivce or help, i would appreciate it. Thank you, -[ kamui ]-

Im currently trying to get close to someone but it's not that she isn't showing an intrest as such i think she worried what her friends might think i mean the only time we really talk together is when there's a group of us and that only happens on a Wednesday at my college (got a half day, 3hrs to wait for bus). She seems to fill everything that im looking for in a gf but i don't want to rush nothing and make a big mess and end up being depressed with myself. I think that she's also nervous and wants to as well but it's hard for both of us when were not going to do anything. Im at a whole stop with my love life and my current life, it's being bugging me for awhile. About the filling the gap, i guess your right im probably going to have to find a way to fill the gap myself. Thanks again. -[ kamui ]-

Im after an attractive girl, quaint, with a good personality and knows what she want's i suppose. I don't mind being friends with girls i have quite a few girl friends but i really want a gf, i just feel so lonely. Very few people really know me and when i mean few only a couple, im a shy guy but i have been trying to overcome my fear of shyness and becoming more confident but it doesn't seem to be working. I seem to be taking some rejections better than other, it took a my last recjection about a week for me to come back to normal because i really liked this girl. I'm not afraid of being friends with these girls it's just that i want a gf, someone special that i can call mine someone i can rely on and i want to be relyed on i suppose again im wanting to be needed. I just want to fill this big gap that's missing in my life, which has been since for ever . Thanks for replying, -[ kamui ]-

Hi everyone, At the moment i hate my life and myself i have never had a gf and i have no possible career prosepects. I constantly falling in and out of depression i try asking girls out but they either say "No" or they just rather stay friends with me. My life has been going down hill i fallen behind on college work, i have no part-time job so im constantly living on my savings which i shouldn't. I just feel lonely, empty inside and as if no-one loves me, i hate going out with my friends because they all have someone "special" with them and i hate being the odd one out of the bunch and so i spend most of my weekends at home doing nothing. Even if i wanted to go looking for a gf i don't know where to start, im not a clubbing sort of guy and i cant even drive yet, so im restricted to where i can go and im strapt for cash. So im sure my life can only get worse , sometimes i think that god is picking on me. I don't have many friends, because most of them have moved away or left for good and those that i have well as i explained above. Feeling depressed again, and wondering why im even on this planet... can anyone please help me, Thank you. -[ kamui ]-

There is a college party next week on Tuesday night, i've asked if she going but she told me that she wasn't. She said that she'd be spending her time at home reading a book and cuddling up with her dog she said "i get all the love i need from her" (meaning the dog) so i don't know whether i was suposed to pick and ask her then, but me being me as stupid as i am can't pick up hints. I hate myself for being this way, pathetic and such an idiot. Thanks for replying. -[ kamui ]-

Hi everyone, For the last couple of months i've been trying to get close to this girl that's at my college. We have been friends since i started the college but never really been close. There has been a bit of a spark between us ever since the first time we were made to introduce ourselves in class. But for so long i have kept my feelings hidden and they've been growing and growing. It's only recently that she seems to be showing some sort of an intrest but she to shy to come out and say or show, mind you im the same so we've come to a problem with us liking each other none of us will confess as much as i wan't to i can't. She is everything that i have been looking for in a gf, i haven't really ever had a gf probably because of my standards are being to high or i'm just not what girls want. I mean when i talk with her i always use direct eye contact so dose she and were always smiling and she always got something to say (well... most of the time) also she laughs at my jokes and funny comments so it's got to be a good sign. But again back to the main problem i can't express my affection for her and i don't really know how because i've never had a gf. I know you lot are going to say that why don't i tell her but i've tried loads of times but i cant and she hasn't tried either unless it's only now that she has really taken an intrest. I have thought about asking her out of the weekend even though we live quite a distance away from each other, i'd travel any lentgh if it meant being with her. Any advice, can anyone please help me i would appreciate it, Thanks alot. -[ kamui ]-

Judging by the sound of it you have an ability which is known as "Empathy" which most people have it but there are others which are more intune with it. It's like a psychic ability you are picking up other peoples emoitions and your are going through all of them what ever the emoition is. Having empathy can make you ill and you can become depressed with it, you can either see it as a gift or a curse. You cannot get rid of empathy it's impossible but there are ways to control it, most common way is through meditation. Hope this gives you some sort of idea, All the best. -[ kamui ]-

Hey everyone, I could do with some advice if possible. Im 19 and never had a gf (i'm a pathetic looser, in my eyes i am), i don't seem to have trouble making friends especially girls but they only want to be friends and nothing more. I've been feeling really depressed lately... i lie for quite a while, i have no part-time job, no gf and i don't know what im doing in college also the assignments are bogging me down. There is this one girl at my college who i have liked ever since i started there we talk sometimes but only when she's with friends. I really feel like she could be the "ONE" but i don't know with never been out with a girl and never been in love it's kind of hard for me to know. She is a very attractive girl and she is available i have found that out, we also have similar intrests but i don't know how to deal with asking her out and then being rejected. Some days i want to go up to her and tell her my feelings but there's always something telling me that it's not going to work. I really don't have any confidence also im really prone to negative energy making depressed i also have this nack for picking up other peoples emotion and mixed with mine it makes me ill sometime i have to leave lectures half way to get some fresh air because of the emoitions that are built up in the classroom. I want this girl so much but i don't know how to get round to telling her, or maybe because i've never had gf im now becoming desprate. I mean i don't even know how to french kiss a girl and i feel like i've let myself down by being me a shy and easy to fall in love idiot. I just wish for once that luck would work in my favour, but so far it doesn't seem to want too and never has. I would of loved even to of had one experince, but no i feel like god is restricting and telling me "NO!". I appologies for rammbiling on like this, im like this when i get depressed... again i lie im worse Any advice or suggestion would be greatful, Thanks. -[ kamui ]-

Hi Shelly, I appologies for not replying to your post i have been a bit pre-ocupied as of lately. Well i would suggest going to another game and then after the gane ask him if he's busy, if not does he fancy doing something just the two of you. I wouldn't suggest giving him a call, just go to the game and see how it goes from there im sure that gut feeling was you being a little nervous it's nothing to be worried at least he's keeping eye contact with you which is good. Hope this has helped. -[ kamui ]-

I do appologies for thinking that your a guy. I forget about the new modification that have happened to the profiles and the status when posting and i don't bother looking my fault entirly. Well at least you know where your up to with her now, at least she likes you. Who knows what might happen in the future. Your very welcome to the advice . All the best, -[ kamui ]-

I suppose your right, i mean i plucked up the courage to give a Valentine's Day gift in front of her friends (which wasn't really part of the plan) but i did it. I say this now but when next week comes i probably won't do anything i'll start getting paranoid and then again running through the worst-case senario possible (god im pretty pathetic ). How do you read someone who is so confident i really want to open her up, but i think that her confidence is hiding something. Deep down i think she's a really shy girl and i have a feeling that she does like me (this is me hoping ) but she's shy and im shy and no-one's going to make the first move. I'd love to make the first move but im scared, why because i don't know how because knowing me i'll make a complete mess of the perfect situation. When im with her i always seem to show my caring / funny side i love making her laugh (i love seening her smile ). I'd be skipping lectures and not coming in if it wasn't for her, the only reason i come to college is to see her. Im gonna stop here because knowning me im gonna rant on about the same thing again and again lol. Thanks, -[ kamui ]-

It's not like i haven't tried to show her my feelings, when i talk to her i always try to show an intrest in her and in her personal life. One of her hobbies is playing football (she told) and i ask her how her game went. I really im try im quite sure she has noticed that i like her from the gift i gave her for Valentine's Day. If i did ask her out we would have to meet somewhere half way because we live about 30-50 miles from each other. When ever i like a girl the first thing that comes to my head when im thinking of asking them out is the possible worst-case senarios that could happen, don't ask why it just happens. I want to ask her out so much but she's never around in college when i want her to be and i only have 2 lectures with her . It's also finding the right time when i can get her alone because most of the time it's impossible to separate her from her friends. I really do like/love her but if i get rejected it will only add to my depression and i'll feel even more worse and then i'll be wanting to die again. I have the worst luck with women, god obviously doesn't like... period. -[ kamui ]-

I know i mean we talk now and then (when we get the chance) and we say "Hi" to each other when we see each other. I suppose i could ask her for her number and ask her out but again i have that fear of being rejected by her i don't want that because i like her so much. I fall in love to easily but i never get a chance to date them because either i get turned by the girls or me being to shy to ask. I wish that she would open herself up to me, i don't know why but when im around people especially friends they tend to open up to me with even their most darkest secrets but the funny thing is that i never tell them anything, im willing to listen to other peoples problems. I suppose i told people my secrets that it would leave me vulnrable (that's what i think anyway) and this is why i never open up to anyone. But this girl i can't to seem to pin her down i suppose with her being so confident that's what i admire about her and that's probably what i love about her so much including her wonderful personality. I want to strip her confidence and get behind it to really get to know her, i know i can't do this without asking her out but it to scared incase of being rejected (again im being a whimp). -[ kamui ]-

But this girl has all of the ideal qualities that im looking for i just don't know how she feels. She's confident in everything she does and says or unless that's some sort of front that hiding something. She's beautiful, smart, funny and caring i really want her when i talk to her i feel different i feel happy and as if nothing else matters in the world on if it's just for a few minutes. But when she leaves (im sure i spell't that wrong) i get depressed and wished i had said something more to her. I torturing myself of her as well but i've tried showing my feelings to her but i don't know if she's caught onto them or not. I wish i could get closer to her but at college that almost seems impossible and i can't see her over the weekends because she lives about 30-40 miles away from me and i don't even know her number. Im trying so hard and yet getting nowhere fast and i feel like giving up but it's knowing that she's the "ONE!" is what's sort of keeping me going but for how long. Thanks, -[ kamui ]-

Thanks musicguy, It's not that girls aren't attracted to me it's just that i can't find the right person that matches what i want. I suppose im setting my standards to high for what im really looking for in a gf. With seening everyone around me being so happy with whoever that their with i just get so depressed. I just feel that i have everything that i want but there a big hole that's missing and i believe that it's that special someone that's needed to make me complete. But i tired to trying and getting no where i tried to make an impression on a girl that i like and bought her a Valenitine's gift she liked, blushed and then gave me a hug but not long after i felt alone again. This is the girl that i want to be with (she has no bf) but i try to let her know my feelings through buying her a gift but i don't know if she's intrested, and that's getting me down. Im just have a bad month i guess. Well i have a whole week of doing nothing and being bored, god i hate my life. Thanks for the advice earlier. -[ kamui ]-