crushed_rejected

hey super dave ya seem to be giving out pretty good advice just wondering if you could give me some??I have been on this site before a while back when things were VERY bad and for some reason the feelings are coming back now it is 9mths since the went on the break(with full intension of getting bac2gether) and 7 mths since the nc(he said the never wanted to see me or hear from me again!!! i never cheated on him never did anything that would have hurt him. But we were fighting a lot and the spark was kinda gone. think he prob found some1 else ) it was very strange how he acted he completely crushed me and my world came tumbling down around me but i managed to build myself up again, i got back in with my friends have gone on girlie wkends, have travelled around south america for a mth, am doing well considering 7mths ago i was a complete mess. But the crazy thing is i still love him with my whole heart and soul, i think about him everyday and really just want to talk to him and hug him.I have done the nc(but i did slip up and send him bac his car reg. form with a little message - hey found this when i was moving stuff thought you might need it. not a single reply. not even a txt to say thanks.) so yeah i cringe now at my mistake. But it was his birthday on mon and i didnt make contact at all. I just wondering do you think he will eventually make contact? i just kills me to think how things ended with us

Hey Yo, oh my god the B*tch, that was a horrible way to end things. Di she follow this so called soulmate to the US?? yeah mayb they act all mean to make themselves stronger trying to convienve themselves that they dont love the person that they are better off alone. I think the crying and begging, which i did, makes you less appealing and really doesnt make them feel sad or sorry. I just cant understand how 2 people can spend some much time together, share so many hope dreams wishes and then one of them treats the other like their worst enemy. My little head just cant understand that al all!!! But yeah if anyone ended things horrible with their ex please let us know why!!!

Hey Yo, do you think that when they act in a super mean horrible way with no emotion that they are trying to convience themselves that they are being strong and right by breaking it off with you??? My ex was a great guy(yeah we had some problems who doesnt)he said he didnt truly know what love was until he met me, wantedto marry me, kids names picked, where we would build the house you name it.But in the last 3mths of the relationship he turned into a COMPLETELY different person(he started hanging around with a new group of lads from work - he is 22!!)He ended the relationship over the phone,said he didnt love me, that he never wanted to see me ever again, he didnt care if all our plans were ruined he wanted to move onto better things basically !!! But only 2 wks before this he looked me in the eye and told me he loved me that this break we were on would make us stronger that we would be together forever and he knew it!!!!so what the hell?? You able to decode that behaviour anyone???!!!!

I love the top ten poetry entry - good way of dealing im going to try it. Top ten sorry 11!!!also seems a good way forward - Hate them. Really really am trying to get to that stage but for some ungodly reason i cant!!! I look at his picture and miss him, instead of saying you a** you ripped my heart out and stamped all over it, and then made the pain so much worse by throwing heartless information at me, just incase you hadnt already succeeded in crushing me already!!!!So yeah working on the hate thing if anyone knows how to get there quicker please let me know!!!

Hi all i posted here a few months ago when my b/f ended things with me in a pretty mean way. I must say since April i have become stronger and managed to take myself out of the dark dark mist that surrounded me,i got back in with friends, i travelled for a month, threw myself into hobbies and have set myself a lot of goals in which i hope to achieve in the next few months. But the thing is i STILL miss him, think about him, wonder if he is thinking about me, does he want me back, does he realise he made a mistake and his pride is in the way of saying so. There is not a day that goes by that i dont think about him, is that wrong???? We have had NC since that terrible phone call, although at times i have had to literally throw the phone away from me to stop me texting, it got easier but i still want to talk to him hug him hear his voice his laugh!!!! I was going to wait until Oct and text him for his birthday, but i dont know. I know people say not to use NC as a tactic, but i dont really know if i am!!! I do know that i prob would not be able to cope if he told me he was with someone else and that he was happy - this was the guy i was going to marry, we even knew our babies names!!!! I know they say that if you love them set them free, but i am just finding it so so so hard Has anyone else gone thru this, or lads have you broken up with someone and the NC made you realise what you threw away???

I totally understand how you feel and what you are going thru, My bf did the same thing to me and 4 weeks later i stil love him, stil think about him and stil hope and pray he will make contact. We broke up 3 mths ago but the 1st 2mths we were in contact and saw each other about 2 times each time we were with each other!!Anyway the last time i saw him he looked me in the eyes and told me he loved me so much, he said that we wud be stronger than ever and that we would be together forever he just knew it, then 6days later after i made a drunken phone call to him, he rang and said that he loved me but wasnt in love with me(what the hell that means i do not know!! ) that he had fallen out of love with me 2mths ago and really didnt care if he never saw me again - he was so so cruel and mean and harsh to me i was in total shock and stil am. I really dont understand guys and how they act, i think was he maybe saying that to try and protect himself in case he thought he wud get hurt?? If you ever find out the answer let me no!!! Try and keep the chin up girl and dont be afraid to let the tears flow

Hey i think life is short so dont waste time thinking wat if. If you want to express your feelings towards her then do so, but you must be prepared for the emotional rejection that you may experience. Like you said you have been in contact more with her, i to am going thru a similar experience and my txting and contact lead my boyfriend to think that he must not love me anymore cos he had not been in as much contact!!! So sometimes it can make the person want you more other times it can push them away. Go away to Germany, say what you have to say and then make a clean break if the result is not what you hoped for. Many people have said to me that if you end all contact it will make the other person worry, they will wonder why u are not making contact and they will want you more. I did this this and it worked and then my moments of weakness lead to the other results rejection. I wish you the best of luck with everything hope you get the result you want.

Hey just replying to what Chai714 said - You said once you decide to take a break you know its over, no we didnt - all we ever spoke about was getting back together and all the things we would do when we did!!You also said actions say so much more than words, this i agree with, so when he decided to arrive at my door and surprise me that told me he was thinking of me and wanted to be with me, he looked at me with such love in his eyes and held me like he would never let go and thank god i have her!!! So its these actions of his, followed by his cruel words a week later that are driving me totally mad!!! I truly dont believe he fell out of love with me in Jan, i really dont know whats happened to him.

I am writing this in a total state of shock, confusion and heartbreak. In Jan myself and my boyf decided to take a break in our 2 yr relationship due to fighting we said we wud give each other some time and space. During this break however we were in contact and soon realised how much we missed each other. After 3 wks he was with some girl(kissed her) but told me it meant nothing and that he loved me with all his heart, (he called around to my place, we cried together and one thing lead to another!!)after that we made no contact for 5 wks(he was giving me space to deal) until he sent a txt saying he would love to meet up with me. We were in contact then and on the 20th of april he made a surprise visit to my house, the look in his eyes was love and we had an amazing night together, he said he missed me so much and looked my straight in the eyes and told me he loved me. He said he wanted so much to get back together, but felt that some more time would be better, he was afraid if we got back to soon that we would fall back into fighting, he said he would get himself sorted (some personal issues and s*x issues) so we said we would get back together after the summer. But on tues nite we talked on the phone and he said that he loved me but wasnt in love with me, that he felt the relationship had run it course and it didnt bother him if he never say me again and that he didnt care about all the plans we had made(we had our babies names picked out, where we would live,planned to travel auz2gether) I asked when he fell out of love with me and he said around Jan!!! None of it makes sense, if you were not in love with someone and didnt care if you never saw them why would you txt, ring and do surprise visits!!!!I am completely shocked and confused. Only 6days before the phone call he txted saying he loved me and all he wanted was for us to be back to the way we were and he knew we would be. He was always so so so loving during our 2 yrs, yeah we had our fair share of problems but who doesnt. I dont know wat to do, i havent eating in 3 days, im shaking and crying and heartbroken. Please if anyone has any bit of advice no matter how small please pass it on, Please i dont know what to do.