First, I don't really drink. I'm not into cause I'm not really around it. I say try and keep yourself away from it. But the thing is, I know you may not be able to do that. It most likely is an adolescent stage. I don't think you're disgusting for posting this. I think you're just tryin to get help or an opinion. Try surrounding yourself with people that don't do that stuff. IF not, just hang in there and try and be strong.