libra smith

He will be getting internet access as soon as he is situated on base. He has never been to okinawa so we are not sure if he will be in the barracks as he was her in the states or what. thereforeeee we have to wait til he actually arrives. sucks but we will live. He can check emails at the library on base at first until that gets set up but the time changes because of the international dateline are so long i may be keeping some strange hours. Not to much to ask though. The journal is a great idea though. Even if we kept a written one and mailed it weekly or something. Then we could feel involved in everyday thoughts and happenings. Its a long road ahead but atleast he is here with me now for a few more days. thanks

My boyfriend is leaving Wednesday and he will be overseas. Neither of us are that familiar with all of the ways to communicate. We plan to write, use messenger, and some phone calls also do you know of any other ways. creativity helps. I do know I have been told there are many ways through the internet. can you inform me of some of the web adresses available. We are willing to try any forms of communication the telephone can get costly. His cellular phone company doesnot carry service over there so we had to let that go and that was our main form of communication when he was in the US and only 2100 miles away.

Hello, well hes on his way home for 30 days and he will be leaving for okinawa after leave. We have talked and talked about what we should do about this relationship and neither of us can imagine our lives with out the other one in it. distance or not. So we are sticking it out. He will go to Ja pan and we will work it out one day at a time minute by minute whatever it takes. after the first year we will reevaluate the cituation and he will come home and a wedding will be planned and happen then if all is well ! How exciting! A little time! A little Anticipation! It wont change what we have thats real. We are pretty secure in that now. We are not concerned anymore with what God has planned for us. We have forever the Navy cant hold us back. Everything is so clear to us both now and time has definatly helped clarify all the fear and doubt we shared. Thank you for your advice.

Hello, well hes on his way home for 30 days and he will be leaving for okinawa after leave. We have talked and talked about what we should do about this relationship and neither of us can imagine our lives with out the other one in it. distance or not. So we are sticking it out. He will go to Japan and we will work it out one day at a time minute by minute whatever it takes. after the first year we will reevaluate the cituation and he will come home and a wedding will be planned and happen then if all is well ! How exciting! A little time! A little Anticipation! It wont change what we have thats real. We are pretty secure in that now. We are not concerned anymore with what God has planned for us. We have forever the Navy cant hold us back. Everything is so clear to us both now and time has definitely helped clarify all the fear and doubt we shared. Thank you for your advice.

Today is my boyfriends email buddys birthday, He forgot her birthday but through a mutual friend I remembered. i called him at his duty station and informed him of this error. He called her at home and wished her a happy birthday and she was so happy that HE had remembered his birthday. I also sent her a card in his name for him bacause he was so busy and he asked me to. I told him he owed me big time for saving his behind. He did tell me that he would repay me gracefully. Found out later he did. Through messenger later that evening, She was talking to her daughter, his best friend, about this conversation that they had had on the telephone and she talked of how he had informed her of how wonderful our relationship was going and how happy he was and how it was so much better than he had even expected it could have been. This is the lady who I read the email from prior that was telling him we were not good for each other and that he should re think his relationship with me. That made me feel so great. i worried about what she thought and what he would think of what she said for nothing but to be a paranoid women. Oh and I also told him about the email snoop issue and he said he has nothing to hide from the person he plans to spend the rest of his life with. I told him I was very sorry. He got a good laugh out of it. Thanks for all the advice :

Today shes talking all kinds of bs about the reasons why she should not be around me. Her husband is number one in her life and if this decision makes him happy than thats whats important to her and all that matters. I can understand that but how weak is that excuse that you cant talk out the issues with your husband and make him understand that it is not ok to dominate your wife in this manor I am not doing any thing wrong in this friendship. I am not on drugs I am not a bad influence I am just an example of a strong women with a backbone. OOPs thats the problem a backbone maybe she should have got one and stood up for her self and not lost her friend of four years and her childrens auntie and spoke up on how she felt about him condeming her feelings and instead shes going to wake up one day and think whoa i lost a friend who was there thru thick and thin I cant say I can wait around thru this one, my feelers are very hurt. Can say that this decision has scared the bond we had. I can say I hope no man ever trys to tell me who i should be around and order my decisions I can appreciate opinions but decisions should be made on our own behalf, input very much appreciated.

Yesterday my friend decided that it would be easier to end our four year friendship them to listen to her husband whine and complain everytime she is around me. He is a truck driver and is only around on the weekends. I have always respected the fact that on the weekends they spend what little time they get to spend together they spend then I dont come around then. But we were around each other pretty much all the time other wise. She has 3 boys and I have 3 kids we do the mom thing together. She helped me through my recent divorce and I could not have done it with out her.I helped her to find God and Was with her family when her 3rd baby was born.Her kids call me Auntie. Mine her also. I feel hurt and like something is missing. I expressed to her that her husband should not make her feel like it would be easier to make this kind of change but she says she has to put him first. I can understand putting your husband first but i hope when i marry again that i dont end up with a man who would tell me I cant have my friends. She told me that she feels like she shares everything with me. Her family, her inlaws, her husband, her kids, etc. because we were so close that my kids called her auntie and her inlaws grandma and stuff like that. When my divorce happened her husband would change my oil and stuff like that. These things seem so minor to me and i feel like it is an easy way to submit to her husbands wishes instead of sitting down and talking to him about it. Maybe there is more to it. Who knows but I am hurt by it and most of all those children will be hurt by her decisions.what do I do know? I plan to respect her wishes but We go to church together. My kids will ask to see her. And we live 1 mile apart. It seems like a divorce all over again.

So refreshing to see a man actually care to honestly express his feelings openly about actually treating a woman with respect and genuine concern for pleasing their needs. I applaud you for standing up for the "Mr GooDmen" out there in this crazy mixed up world of lustful men who only have concern for themselves and their own satisfaction. Men like you will end up with women who respect you and strive to make you happy also. (if you haven't found one already) Again, I congratulate you on you outlook on woman and your respect for our needs and femininity!

My parents have been married for 38 years. This year they have decided to divorce. Everytime they argue about the issues surrounding the cituation one or both of them call me! I am having a hard time figuring out how to stay out of the middle of it. I am 31 years old and I do have strong opinions on their issues, but they are still my parents and I love them both.I don't have to agree with them in order to love them. I DON'T HAVE TIME TO COUNSEL THEM. Nor is that what they are looking for. I feel like they want confirmation of their feelings from me. I am trying to be open minded but It is so hard to watch being that I just went through a divorce last year also. What can I do to help with out being rude or uncaring? I want to help. I want to be there for both of them. I wish I could mend there hurt and help them see eye to eye. They have not actually left the home yet but it is definatly in the works.

Sweatheart, your in good shape. My boyfriend lives 2149 miles away right now. and is being deployed to okinawa japan next stop. I only wish he was 500 miles away. How old are you? Can you drive? These things make the distance harder. No one can understand how you feel but you 100 miles can be hard if it is difficult to get together. dont give up though.

I see,thanxs for the 411. I guess sometimes you just need to hear it from someone else. Long distance Relationships make you Question things that arent even there sometimes. I could say though Guilt is a harsh feeling. I felt horrible for reading the letters. He probably thought nothing of them or would not of sent me to them. Duh Well as i said before brain overload to much time thinking and doubting. Hope others can learn from my expierience. Thanx again

Can you clarify? are you saying him asking me to check his e-mail is a sign of a steady girlfriend? Are you being sarcastic? As for religion? I would never become part of someones religion solely for there family. Religion is about beliefs and ways deeper principles than that! He and i have had some very long dicussions about his religion and I have learned his beliefs and actually dont have much of a problem with them. i prefer my christian belief system. He also has studied my beliefs and prefers his mormon system. We agree that we do not want either to change our choice of religion for the other person. We both do spend time, when we are together at each others churches functions. I guess you could say we are both very liberal about our belief systems. Basically, the issues here were the insecurities I felt in reading the letters in the e-mails. And the fact that i was worried about the influences that others could have on him. probably being silly. As I stated before to much time on my hands today.

My boyfriend asked me to check his e-mail for him because he hasnt been by a computer lately. I read a note written to him by a friend of his family that is close to him. she was talking to him about how i was not the girl for him because of religious beliefs her and his church has and how he should really consider our relationship carefully. I was hurt by this letter because I thought she liked me. mind you i had no business in his e-mail. And i guess i deserved To find something I didnt want to find. I did speak to him about her feelings about me but i told him that i had heard about them threw her daughter who is a mutual friend of ours and the one responsible for our meeting in the first place. He told me not to worry about her that she was an old mormon lady with strict values and is very opinionated and she always feels that no one is right for him or anyone she cares about for that matter. and all that matters is how he feels. But i think because of the insecure feelings that i feel for snooping i still feel doubting and unsure. The distance is already hard without feeling like you have people in his ear influencing his decision making. i am very secure in my relationship until i let my mind go 100 miles a minute. Which usually happens when i have to much time on my hands. the bigger issue is also the guilt i feel for snooping. Should i tell him or just simply not repeat the mistake. One of these days i may see something terrible after all curiosity killed the cat.

boy oh boy let me tell you, my best friend just hed the exact same argument with her husband last night. He was telling her they needed marriage counseling and they are the best married couple i know. women after having babies change the way they feel about sex. this feeling comes and goes. I am not saying that your destined for an eternity of lack there of, but be very very careful what you say. It really does hurt her feelings if you tell her shes not making you happy. like you said before you love her very much and she you. Use careful words. Do things to help her feel that. Buy her flowers take her to dinner. get a babysitter overnight, a grandparent to keep your daughter and plan a romantic evening as a surprize dont tell her and dont let it leak through grandma. sweep her off her feet like you used to do before.You will enjoy the results. womens sex drive comes and goes after haveing babies give her some time and be considerate. guys dont have these problems its a physical make up thing. we have babies you dont. so be sensitive. make her feel needed and loved in other ways be romantic the end result will be what you need. believe me she knows what will make you happy with out you telling her.

you may think i'm crazy but i live in liberal california where you can get away with just about everything. spanking teaches him to hit. at that age you are showing him what is exceptable with everything you do. spend time redirecting him over and over and over again. It is sooo frustrating but it works Be creative. Maybe he is an outdoors type of child tire him out take him out side and play running races with him. Take him one on one every opputunity you can and talk to him alot in a slow mild tone. Yelling and loud voices start violent behaviors. Be as calm and scheduled and regular in your activities as you can all of these things show him struture and dependibility and security which calms and assures him.also take him to a doctor and express your concerns if you dont feel they listen to you take him to another. counselors for you in your freetime also. make sure you get breaks from him also. And bed time is very important make sure it is early and the same time every night. start early and slowly lead up to it.try dinner then bath. then story. then a movie a short one of course sometimes it helps for it to be the same one all week then change it next week. try a phonics abc tape first. repitition is key. then bedtime. dont forget a drink. stick to the program and have your time at night. fyi I have a autistic son and a 3 year old and a 2 year old and i tryed this and all the drama is much easier i have bad days and good days but the bad days are fewer. good luck.