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Thread: Friendship turned into relationship mess

  1. #1

    Friendship turned into relationship mess

    Backstory : I meet a guy my sophomore year of high school . We instantly clicked and i fell head over heels for him . We exchanged numbers and became close and then we became best friends we would help each other and facetime and call each other whenever we could even falling asleep on the phone. I thought i really thought he liked me . Not to mention we had both flirted and said things to each other so it wasnít like i was the only
    one feeling each other . Now iím a big girl ... Thick if you will and i have no problem admitting that. But i started to notice he treated me differently . Only when he was around his friends. End of back story

    Fast forward to now and iíve continued our friendship but now itís even more complicated then ever . Heís came over my house and i have gave him oral sex and still he treats me differently. After being there for him helping him with homework and being there for him when he had family isssues . My love for him is deep and he treats me like he feels the same way but is scared . But expects me to stay with him even when he does me wrong like lie about him talking to another girl but want me too. Iím confused how do i walk away from someone i have the most feelings that iíve ever had for someone . even when i know he doesnít treat me right . Help me. Please . Do i let him go? Or trust that heíll change ?

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Let's go over this:
    -he treats you differently because of your weight
    -he can't seem to complete his homework on his own
    -he chats up other women
    -he lies

    Would you remind me again what's so hot about him?

  3. #3
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    The promise of change is a common trick guys use in order to keep their partners. They promise that they want to change and they will change, so they start behaving differently for few weeks (so they can show they are making progress) and then the old habits kick in again.

    He treats you badly and yet you stay with him. What that behavior communicates? It communicates that itís ok to treat you badly, you are not going to do something about it and if you do the promise of change will fix things for now. Do you see the pattern?

    Try not to allow other men to treat you badly because this lowers your selfvalue. I always advise women not to count on the promise of change. Leave him and find someone with whom you will resonate better with.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    should I ease up and do some things for him? How do I do this without being taken for granted???
    [/quote] Don't give someone oral sex who doesn't treat you like he values you. You will shred your own heart in no time if you keep doing that sort of thing as a lifestyle.

    Stop giving him your attention because it's not endearing him to you in any way and he's just showing you the little attention he is because it gets him the bj.

    What do you mean "he treats you like he feels the same but is scared?" He hardly is treating you like he loves you if you are here lamenting about the way he treats you. He's not scared, he's scoring oral sex with very little investment, or as it seems anyway. Maybe you could give some more details about how he is treating you "different." How was he treating you but now he isn't doing that?

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  6. #5
    Gold Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    Yes, let him go. He lost respect for you.

  7. #6
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    He isnít scared, OP. He just doesnít feel the same spark you do but heís happy to keep taking advantage of your feelings for him when it suits him.

    Yes, let him go. A good guy doesnít treat his friends like this anyway.

  8. #7
    He's got you hanging on a string. He's playing you like a puppet. He clearly know's how you feel and gives you just enough to keep you there. He's not interested in you at all I'm afraid. He's using and abusing you. Walk away from him, please.

  9. #8
    Gold Member Gary Snyder's Avatar
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    The best thing you can do is date other / another guy and find a replacement. It will ease the pain.


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