how to tell my boyfriend about my passed away fiance

so i dont know if this is considered a conflict but the beginning of November i met a guy who i fell absolutely in love with and he fell inn love with me just the same we both had a difficult up bringing so we could realty with each other when one of us was going through something and we supported the other in times of need we were only dating a couple of months before he asked me to marry him and i said yes i know it seems much to fast but it felt so right for both of us and we both wanted the exact thing when it came to what kind of wedding we wanted and so we planned to get married this summer and after our wedding we were gonna start trying for a family while on our honeymoon everything felt so good and so perfect. but soon after my fiance passed away there were or are any words to describe how bad it hurt besides it felt as if i had died to for months i felt so numb and the bad living conditions with my actual mother made things even worse so i ended up moving in with my step mom where i enrolled i school where i met a guy who was in the same class as me we became friends and for the first time since the passing of my fiance i felt some what happy i even smiled as weeks went on me and him became closer and closer as friends and i began to feel happier and eventually we started dating we have been going out for a about a month i haven't told him about my fiance because I'm afraid if i start talking about him ill start to remember how in love we were and ill start to think about all the plans we had for the future im afraid not only because it will start to hurt again but that its not fair to my current boyfriend because i love him very much and i don't want him feel any lesser than he is but at the same time im afraid the longer i with hold it that when it comes out later in time how it will effect our relation ship if anyone has any advice at all ill be so appreciative

I'm so sorry about your loss! Hugs! That must have been very tragic!

As for your current boyfriend it's great you found love again! I don't see a problem talking about your Fiancé. He was a big part of your life so your boyfriend should understand and emphasize with your loss.

I would open up and tell him about it, if anything it may bring more healing.

Lisa

So in little more than 4 months you meet a guy, fall in love, he asks you to marry him and you're engaged, he dies and you meet someone else and he is your boyfriend now?

I don't know but that just seems awfully quick!

It took a few months before he proposed, you grieved for a couple of months after he died and you became friends with a guy and smiled for weeks and you're dating him for a month now? Wow........ so the meeting of the other guy, falling in love, him proposing, him dying and grieving all took place in little over 3 months?

I don't know but that just seems very very soon to me.....

Anyways i think you should tell him, why not? But i don't think you can truly love someone that soon but that's me......

By the way i am truly sorry for your loss though! That's awful

I wouldn't tell him. Guys get jealous, and to know that he will never be able to live up to or replace your dead fiance in his mind will eat away at him. I've never told anyone I dated about any other girls I've dated. I've wanted them to feel special. Like they were the only one in my heart, which they were at the time. In your case, it might turn him off to know that you're dating him only three months after your finance died. He'll feel like a rebound. And especially don't tell him if you're going to start crying in front of him. It'll make him feel second place even more. You might tell him one day, but don't ruin it now. It has nothing to do with you current relationship. You can keep some things to yourself.

Not only three months after her fiance died but three months after she met her fiance!

Holy punctuation Batman!

I mean, I guess it's good you are able to grieve then move on so quickly?

How long ago did your fiance die? How old was he? How long were you together? Unfortunately the situation you are in currently is loaded with red flags and way too much to soon. This isn't about telling this guy who you're dating 2 mos about your fiance, this is about thinking it's "so in love, so perfect" because it's a relief from your grief and you are merely looking for a warm body to replace your fiance. Dating 8 weeks you barely know this guy.

we were only dating a couple of months before he asked me to marry him and i said yes

How long ago did your fiance die? How old was he? How long were you together? Unfortunately the situation you are in currently is loaded with red flags and way too much to soon. This isn't about telling this guy who you're dating 2 mos about your fiance, this is about thinking it's "so in love, so perfect" because it's a relief from your grief and you are merely looking for a warm body to replace your fiance. Dating 8 weeks you barely know this guy.

She said she met the deceased fiance in November.

Whoa there, Batman.

OP, you need time to properly grieve and heal. I too have lost an ex, so I sympathize greatly with you. It's very hard. Please, don't date right now. It's obvious you're not ready.