Girlfriend left me for a man with money

New member and first post here so if I offend anyone I'm sorry.

PART 1

I'm going to try and make a long story short here as believe me it is a long story with many twists and turns.

Here goes.

I live in Thailand, I came here to live 11 years ago. I'm from the UK originally.

I came here to live with a girl I'd met on previous visits who I thought was the one for me. That lasted about 6 months until the demands for cash from her family became way too much and so she was history.

Next up was another girl and we were together for maybe 2 years before we split, mainly due to money.

As you can see money here is number 1.

Fast forward a few years to November 2016 and another couple of failed relationships and bingo, I meet a girl and we have a spark between us like I've never felt before, she said the same, she said it was like we'd been together in a previous life but were pulled apart and now we have the chance to make it right. The downer was that she worked as a dancer at an agogo, basically she is a prostitute.

After our first night together I asked her if I had to pay her ? Her reply was "I want you, not your money".

Now this girl was honest with me, it's a different world here compared to the western world and she still went with customers for money and I was ok with that as she was being honest, unlike other girls who all lied behind my back.

She quickly moved in with me and we had ups and downs but we always made up and it was quickly forgotten about.

Then in June last year she had a customer take a shine to her, he was paying her big money and on a regular basis. He lived and worked in Thailand but in a different city about a 4 hour drive away.

In July last year she came home and dropped the bombshell, he wanted her to go with him to his city ! She swore he was only a customer and it was going to be an all expences paid holiday for her with a good salary. I basically told her to f*** off with him and we were finished.

She went with him but messaged every day saying she loved and missed me.

2 weeks after she'd gone they came back and we met, it was great, we got on fantastic, she let me see her phone and in all of their messages there was never love mentioned, never.

She'd actually told a friend about this man and was laughing about him saying he's fat and pays too much and sex is over very quickly.

Anyway, that was the end of July, things weren't good between us and we were having big problems because she kept going off with this customer but she was coming back at weekends to see her son, and me of course.

In September we had a blazing argument and finished, for good I thought and although it hurt I was ok and was determined to move on.

Part 2

After that argument I thought we were completely finished and basically I started doing no contact and getting out with friends more, I missed her but the situation with the customer was doing my head in so it was best for me to move on.

12 days into no contact my doorbell rang, it was her friend who owed me money and my ex ! I was shocked but we spoke a little and she said she was missing me !

Later that night she called me and asked if we could meet up for a drink and play pool ?

We met and after an hour or so she asked what my plans were for later ? I told her I'd be going home soon because all she was doing was messaging her customer, she showed me her messages, she was telling him it was raining and she'd be staying with her son tonight meaning she wanted to stay with me.

She came back to my house and just started crying, she missed her friends, her son, me, she missed it all here and she was so lonely when she went away with him, her words were something like I can't be myself when she was with him and she was tired of it.

End of September came and into October and we were still meeting up when she came back, still the same story, I love you and he is just a customer but what can she do as he's paying her top money to be his trophy.

End of October came and the customer went back to the USA for 10 days and she was all over me like a rash but again there were arguments and in the end I said to her "we leave it now, no more until he's gone for good" and I meant it.

November came and went with no contact, it was hard because as I said before there was a chemistry between us, can't be together, can't be apart. I missed her like crazy but I was determined now.

Middle of December her friend is supposed to call round with some money she owed me, guess who showed up ? Her, my ex.

We talked a bit, she'd been out with the customer the night before and she said all she could think about was me, the irony being that on the night in question I'd been out with a friend of mine less than 50 metres from where they were !

Were they married yet ? No

Did she love him yet ? No, I love his money.

Oh and the sex is still no good she said and she still hadn't cum with him.

We had a hug and a kiss and said goodbye and that should have been that ?

Part 3

So into January this year, her friend told me that the ex wanted to come and see me on New Years Eve but I said I was busy and couldn't wait around for her.

Middle of January I get up and see a missed call on my phone, her number. I sit down with a cup of coffee and a cigarette and she calls again, I ignore it, then she rings again, ok I'll answer it, she has some lame excuse for meeting me and could she come to my house and was I alone ?

Long story short, we ended up in bed after she'd been here 3-4 hours, she instigated it not me.

She had to catch a bus to meet her customer in Bangkok that night, she wasn't happy about it and didn't want to go but he who pays the money makes the orders so off she went.

I woke up the next day to a load of messages from her, she missed me and was crying and it was 10,000% true.

She called or messaged me whenever she could get away from him just to talk. Then after 3 days the messages stopped, weird I thought but then I get a call can I go and pick her up from her friends house, it turned out that she's using an old phone of his and while they were driving and using this phone for GPS a message from me popped up saying miss you, xxx

He wasn't a happy bunny and getting messages to me or calls were difficult because he was watching her now.

On the day I met her at her friends she had to catch the bus back to his city so she came to my house, we made love and then I took her to the bus.

She gets on the bus and off she goes. Now what she doesn't know is that I have access to her facebook messenger through an old phone of mine she used, it's no good to me because she uses messenger for her Thai friends and my Thai knowledge is nil, but as soon as she was on the bus she was messaging her best friend, her very very best friend. I needed to know what she was saying now and to see what game she was playing with me.

I cannot describe how terribly unhealthy this relationship sounds.

For less drama I would stick to dating people that aren't prostitutes.

I can't even imagine that mind #uck.

Part 4

I got 4 different translations from Thai people, all said basically the same thing, she loved me a lot but loved the money and easy life more ! And she confirmed how she was lonely and sad away from everything here too.

I tried to break it off with her a couple of times because as I kept asking her, what's in this for me now ? She just kept assuring me that she loved me with her heart and her head loved the money.

I'm still getting the phone calls when she had the chance and messages too but not so many as she was scared he may catch her out somehow.

Last week it was Valentines day, she was on the bus back here to see her "son" which meant me, she'd bought me a great gift which I have to say nearly brought tears to my eyes and she loved what I bought her too. We went out that night with her son for a drink and played some pool and had a good time but I was getting annoyed with her for messaging him so much when she was with me.

We went back to her house and made love but I was still annoyed with her messaging him and told her so, he customer, you boyfriend she said. Next day we were out and about and she heard a song and started singing it to me, it's about a lady that has 2 men, she said she had one man had her heart, one man had her body !

Last weekend came and he was due in town and on the Friday night we had an almighty argument again, she'd told me she was coming to see me in the morning, then 5pm, then 7pm and she eventually turned up at 8pm with a friend and a taxi so we didn't even get the chance to talk. I told her to just f*** off now and leave me alone and to stay with him as they deserved each other and I deserved better than what she was giving me.

This last week I messaged her to say sorry for getting so angry and I hoped she was ok, I got a reply back being nasty. I asked her if that meant we were finished now but all I got back was a message saying that someone had told him they'd seen us together on Valentines Night in the bar and she hoped it wasn't me. Goodbye she said !

I cannot describe how terribly unhealthy this relationship sounds.

 

For less drama I would stick to dating people that aren't prostitutes.

 

I can't even imagine that mind #uck.

I know what you mean, after reading it all again all I can say is that if it was someone else telling the story I'd say exactly the same as you.

Dude... You are dating a hooker.... Seriously???. What the hell do you expect out of this?

It is all fake love...

She loved your $ also... But he has more $ than you....

Who do you think she loves more?

Why can't you just find yourself a non hooker girl in Thailand?

And have a normal life....

Conclusion

I know it's messed up but it's a way of life here, different rules etc to how we are in the western world, every girl I've spoken with about it has said they would take the money over love because as they say "love can't buy food". And he is paying her very good money for what she is still calling a holiday.

I've dated a couple of girls when we were in no contact, it was ok but no spark at all with them compared to the ex. The ex asked me if I'd been with anyone else and when I told her I had her face dropped, how do you feel about it I asked her, like someone has pulled my heart out she said ?

She'd made me promise a week or so back that if either of us won the lottery we would get married, she was serious too.

I've seen what she's saying to her best friends so I get the impression she does love me ? or did until last weeks argument ?

I think just writing this down like this and compressing it all ( much more I could add but won't ) has helped me see through the trees. I can't wait around for her, she's told me this customers work contract maybe extended for all this year, we're finished then I said, no she replies, we can still meet as you can come to see me and i can still come to see you when she gets the chance, not going to happen is it ? I asked her to tell me the truth and how did she feel about him being here a year ? Not happy she said ?

Dude... You are dating a hooker.... Seriously???. What the hell do you expect out of this?

It is all fake love...

She loved your $ also... But he has more $ than you....

Who do you think she loves more?

 

Why can't you just find yourself a non hooker girl in Thailand?

And have a normal life....

Haha, read it again my friend, she never wanted my $$. Never has and said right from day 1 she wanted me not my money.

She said last week that if she didn't have her son to take care of she'd be with me but the money from the customer paid for her sons school fees etc etc.

And non hooker girls where I live are like Hens teeth, they don't exist !

I know she loves money more than me, rule number 1 here is money number 1.

Haha, read it again my friend, she never wanted my $$. Never has and said right from day 1 she wanted me not my money.

She said last week that if she didn't have her son to take care of she'd be with me but the money from the customer paid for her sons school fees etc etc.

And non hooker girls where I live are like Hens teeth, they don't exist !

I know she loves money more than me, rule number 1 here is money number 1.

I have a friend in the Philippines who complains it is very hard to find a girl who isn't a prostitute or a girl that will instantly leave a guy for a "bigger, better deal".

I couldn't be with a woman who other guys paid to have sex with.

Just one of those basic requirements.

You aren't going to ever be happy with this girl, and you aren't going to win the lottery.

Why are you attracted to these types of women? Blech! Why do you value yourself so little?

Where are you living in Thailand? I have been many times and most of the women are not hookers. I think it is what you are attracted to. Stop dating women who work at the clubs.

I need to take a shower after reading your thread.

Why are you attracted to these types of women? Blech! Why do you value yourself so little?

 

Where are you living in Thailand? I have been many times and most of the women are not hookers. I think it is what you are attracted to. Stop dating women who work at the clubs.

 

I need to take a shower after reading your thread.

Makes me squeem

Why are you attracted to these types of women? Blech! Why do you value yourself so little?

 

Where are you living in Thailand? I have been many times and most of the women are not hookers. I think it is what you are attracted to. Stop dating women who work at the clubs.

 

I need to take a shower after reading your thread.

I visited Thailand when I was in the military, and although these bar girls are like Vultures with magical tricks... I did however speak to and saw normal women... Never did go to these bars... It was trouble... I basically went sight seeing and took trips to learn about the culture... Met normal women... So yes, I agree with Hollyj....

Something about her being a prostitute excites you. Like, maybe it gives you a charge that she has sex for money. Or, that she has this wealthy "customer" but she still spends time with you.

News flash...you too are a customer, you just aren't paying her for sex.

And who is this "friend" of hers who you are giving money too? You give this "friend" money but not this woman you consider your girlfriend? Doesn't add up.

You may not be a paying costumer of hers but you are being emotionally manipulated.

She is a professional con artist - aka prostitute. . You get that don't you?

While she's conning other men out of their money, she doesn't have the tools necessary to navigate a mature emotional connection. It's how she is hard wired. It's all she knows.

She cons you for some sort of toxic emotional fix and get's her financial needs met by others.

Just expect more of the same.

What's up with the friend of hers you keep giving money too?

You don't think she's part of this transaction even if indirectly?

At the very least you likely give her friend money to stay in your gf's good graces.

How is it any different then paying her for sex?