Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 6 1234 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 58

Thread: When your ex doesn't contact you, is it hate or indifference?

  1. #1
    britomart
    Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    178
    Gender
    Female

    When your ex doesn't contact you, is it hate or indifference?

    I apologize if this a thread like this already exists. I did a quick search and didn't find a similar thread.

    When your ex doesn't contact you, do you feel that he or she hates you, or is indifferent?
    Is hate really better than indifference?
    Has anyone had relations improve after hate or indifference from the ex?

    I'm approaching 50 days of NC. In our last exchange, he said "Too busy to go online and talk to me? Go away." He then responded to my emails by telling me not to send another message. Circumstances being what they are, I've disappeared from his radar, so to say (except for facebook, but then we were never FB friends)

    It seems like I have to conclude that he simply doesn't care, and move on accordingly.

  2. #2
    hater13
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Posts
    425
    I wish I could give you the answer to that

    My ex isn't contacting me out of respect, but who knows...maybe he just doesn't want to talk to me?

    We'll never know unless they directly tell us

  3. #3
    jellysandwich
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    256
    Gender
    Male
    It can be anything really....

    Hate, indifference, respect, busy with the rebound, fear (of rejection), etc etc.

  4. #4
    jraf
    Silver Member jraf's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    On an inlet, on an island, on the edge
    Posts
    350
    Gender
    Male
    Quote Originally Posted by britomart [Register to see the link]
    It seems like I have to conclude that he simply doesn't care, and move on accordingly.
    This is true.

  5. #5
    stormie
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Posts
    687
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    12
    It's part of no contact. It's what everyone does when they break up - they avoid you so as not to have any feelings of guilt or any chance of giving you the wrong impression that you still have a chance.

  6. #6
    abigheart
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    389
    Gender
    Female
    Yes, I think it depends on how the break-up ended, what your relationship was like, etc.

    I don't like to believe it because I'm a pessimist, but I'm pretty sure my ex is not contacting me out of respect. He is respecting my wish for NC. And so I really had no reason to be upset that he didn't send me a birthday text anyway...he is just the kind of person who will try to be as rational as hell - keeping up with the NC because that's what I established for now. At the same time, I'm sure he's enjoying the freedom and no obligations to anyone.

  7. #7
    RyanGeist
    Bronze Member RyanGeist's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    IL
    Age
    31
    Posts
    118
    Gender
    Male
    He might care or he might not care. But considering that the relationship is annulled, this seems a moot point. Moving on is the prerogative.

    When two people break up, they generally don't have contact unless by circumstance. It has nothing to do with hating the other person, but allows feelings to subside, permitting another relationship in its place.

  8. #8
    KittyBoo
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    585
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    1
    It doesn't have to be either hate or indifference. It can simply be what they need to do to heal and move on. So often we only think of how bad we feel and think they are being insensitive towards us. We cannot see the other person's actions simply as something they must do for themselves. Time to stop analyzing what it means and simply move on.

  9. #9
    anu1560
    Silver Member anu1560's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    Happy-Happy Town
    Posts
    490
    Quote Originally Posted by KittyBoo [Register to see the link]
    It doesn't have to be either hate or indifference. It can simply be what they need to do to heal and move on.
    I agree with this.

  10. #10
    Live-N-Learn
    Platinum Member Live-N-Learn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Age
    55
    Posts
    3,238
    Gender
    Male
    Thanked
    17
    My ex has text me twice since I went NC on her 7 weeks ago. One drunken text on week 3, and another this week after deleting her and blocking her on FB. Neither of the contacts made me feel any better. Trust me, if they have moved on the last thing you want is to hear from them. Be thankful they are not in contact.

  11.  

Page 1 of 6 1234 ... LastLast
Top Threads
Embarrassed of posting and ashamed
I dont know if I can do this anymore. Afraid of it all. Broke no contact and replied to text regarding a something very important that needed to be
your ex does think about you
I've been on both sides of the equation. Right now, I'm on the bad side, the person that was broken up with. But I know that he thinks of me. We
Stuck on hurt after cheating ex
Hi My relationship of 18 months came to an end In May. I was deeply in love and I thought he was too, until the last few months when he started
Missing my ex... whats wrong!?
hey guys, i want your thoughts about my current situation.. I was in a long distance relationship with a nice guy i met on a online game.. we were
6 days after break up still struggling
Hi guys My gf broke up with me 6 days ago. we were together 3 years and the first year and a half we lived in the same town and then she moved to
I just want to reach out....I'm struggling
Hi all.... I'm really struggling with no contact and missing my ex especially now it's getting to Christmas. We were together 3 years and lived
Venting
I was in a roller coaster of a relationship from the last year and a half. The first year, we got along really well. He was sweet and thoughtful

Expert Advice
Featured Threads
Tired of Being His Provider??
Okay so I found this site through Google. This seems like a pretty common topic and I suppose I just need to vent. My husband has been unemployed
Beautiful women who works at lush...
So there is this a girl who works at this place. I've been in there twice now and she is a stunner. Its one of those girls who you have to look twice
Being left for another man by my ex girlfriend
My and my ex gf broke up 7 months ago back in late April. We had bad fights and she stated she was unhappy. She then proceeded to have an active
Wondering?
Ok, I posted before about my situation but I would like to further talk. This woman I became involved with 3 years ago TOLD me she had feelings for
Break up Advice Needed
Hi all, I really need some advice on my recent break up with my girlfriend of almost five years. A few months ago I started to feel unhappy and
She's getting ready for marriage. She thinks that it is what I want. My fault.
So, I am pretty much in a difficult situation. I have been with a girl for the past 4 years. In these 4 years, after a while I realized she really
Venting - Advice...?
Hello, Im a 36 year old male, married with 3 kids. My wife and I are pretty much like roommates. There is zero sex life and its from both ends
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •