Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 6 1234 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 58

Thread: When your ex doesn't contact you, is it hate or indifference?

  1. #1
    britomart
    Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    178
    Gender
    Female

    When your ex doesn't contact you, is it hate or indifference?

    I apologize if this a thread like this already exists. I did a quick search and didn't find a similar thread.

    When your ex doesn't contact you, do you feel that he or she hates you, or is indifferent?
    Is hate really better than indifference?
    Has anyone had relations improve after hate or indifference from the ex?

    I'm approaching 50 days of NC. In our last exchange, he said "Too busy to go online and talk to me? Go away." He then responded to my emails by telling me not to send another message. Circumstances being what they are, I've disappeared from his radar, so to say (except for facebook, but then we were never FB friends)

    It seems like I have to conclude that he simply doesn't care, and move on accordingly.

  2. #2
    hater13
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Posts
    425
    I wish I could give you the answer to that

    My ex isn't contacting me out of respect, but who knows...maybe he just doesn't want to talk to me?

    We'll never know unless they directly tell us

  3. #3
    jellysandwich
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    256
    Gender
    Male
    It can be anything really....

    Hate, indifference, respect, busy with the rebound, fear (of rejection), etc etc.

  4. #4
    jraf
    Silver Member jraf's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    On an inlet, on an island, on the edge
    Posts
    350
    Gender
    Male
    Quote Originally Posted by britomart [Register to see the link]
    It seems like I have to conclude that he simply doesn't care, and move on accordingly.
    This is true.

  5. #5
    stormie
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Posts
    692
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    15
    It's part of no contact. It's what everyone does when they break up - they avoid you so as not to have any feelings of guilt or any chance of giving you the wrong impression that you still have a chance.

  6. #6
    abigheart
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    389
    Gender
    Female
    Yes, I think it depends on how the break-up ended, what your relationship was like, etc.

    I don't like to believe it because I'm a pessimist, but I'm pretty sure my ex is not contacting me out of respect. He is respecting my wish for NC. And so I really had no reason to be upset that he didn't send me a birthday text anyway...he is just the kind of person who will try to be as rational as hell - keeping up with the NC because that's what I established for now. At the same time, I'm sure he's enjoying the freedom and no obligations to anyone.

  7. #7
    RyanGeist
    Bronze Member RyanGeist's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    IL
    Age
    32
    Posts
    118
    Gender
    Male
    He might care or he might not care. But considering that the relationship is annulled, this seems a moot point. Moving on is the prerogative.

    When two people break up, they generally don't have contact unless by circumstance. It has nothing to do with hating the other person, but allows feelings to subside, permitting another relationship in its place.

  8. #8
    KittyBoo
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    585
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    1
    It doesn't have to be either hate or indifference. It can simply be what they need to do to heal and move on. So often we only think of how bad we feel and think they are being insensitive towards us. We cannot see the other person's actions simply as something they must do for themselves. Time to stop analyzing what it means and simply move on.

  9. #9
    anu1560
    Silver Member anu1560's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    Happy-Happy Town
    Posts
    490
    Quote Originally Posted by KittyBoo [Register to see the link]
    It doesn't have to be either hate or indifference. It can simply be what they need to do to heal and move on.
    I agree with this.

  10. #10
    Live-N-Learn
    Platinum Member Live-N-Learn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Age
    55
    Posts
    3,241
    Gender
    Male
    Thanked
    20
    My ex has text me twice since I went NC on her 7 weeks ago. One drunken text on week 3, and another this week after deleting her and blocking her on FB. Neither of the contacts made me feel any better. Trust me, if they have moved on the last thing you want is to hear from them. Be thankful they are not in contact.

  11.  

Page 1 of 6 1234 ... LastLast
Top Threads
To those out there hurting - remember who YOU are
Hello guys, I just had a moment of epiphany that I wanted to share with you, with the hope that it will help you go through whatever you're dealing
Closure..
Has anyone met up for closure? Did it help to say goodbye in person? What did you discuss? In my case there is a kid (4) involved that I'd like to
Dumped out of the blue by my fiance of 8 years. Struggling to understand why.
This is my first time posting in a forum online. I am looking for some perspective and understanding about what the hell has happened to me. My
Should I contact my ex for him to get his stuff back? NC 10 days
Hello guys, You've probably seen my thread about my ex not texting me back after break up, etc. I broke up and don't wanna get back although I'm
Dealing with anger after assault.. how to handle mutual friends?
I ended things with a man I had been dating for about 6-8 months, and you can read about it on my last thread I posted if you are interested. So
Writing a book after your break-up
I wrote a thread in "get your ex back" section about my story. Is one of the most recent posts, if you are interested. Btw, I am a "writer" and I
Ex boyfriend texted me after a year
My ex broke up with me nearly a year ago - he had to chase a dream of becoming a professional athlete and felt that the relationship was putting too

Expert Advice
Featured Threads
I love you, but I'm not in love with you.
So my fiancÚ of 7.5 years has decided she isn't in love with me anymore so has broken up with me. Our situation is very complicated we have a 2.5
How far should I go with unfriending/blocking on social media?
Hi all, I'm going hard no contact. She originally unfriended me on Snap and Twitter. I recently unfriended her on FB and IG. I also went a step
missing atm
I think what I miss at the moment is having a friend to talk to like we used to. She became the only person I really talked to for the better part
Mum boyfriend inapropriate
Hi everyone, thought i would share an update on whats happened so far. Thankyou all for helping me out yesterday, everything you all said was really
Girlfriend always mad at me
Me and my girlfriend have been togetehr for almost a year. I love her more than anything and i know shes not cheating on me or anything like that
I [F/26] found underwear in my boyfriend's [M/30] pocket.
I've been with my boyfriend for over a year. Recently, my boyfriend asked me to look for some money, so I looked everywhere and I couldn't find it. I
Ex gf text me out of the blue
I guess I just want some feedback and honest replies as my head is completely gone again. Me and my ex gf have been in no contact for a few months
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •