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Thread: Best advice ever: (read this, girls)

  1. #11
    Silver Member MacGyverRI's Avatar
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    [QUOTE=147nothing;1187455]ALL MEN LIE! Every word! Get the truth before you get involved.

    You hate men and need to get over that by starting with a clean slate ea. time.

    Not all men are the same and you probably, like many people do, go for the same type look that always ends up being the same bad guy time and time again.

  2. #12

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    Originally Posted by 147nothing
    You don't understand. EVERY guy I've ever known has started off with sooooo much sweet-talking and promises of love and marriage. I was fully within my rights to do what I did and I caught a liar, cheater, and potential abuser in the act. How can you even begin to think that guy was honest if he was telling me he loved me and wanted a real relationship with me - even having the nerve to "make sure" that I wasn't talking to any other men online - then when he thinks he has another woman interested in him, he tells "her" that he isn't seeing or talking to anyone else and is very interested! He's a liar and I caught him and I'm proud of it.


    Very good point!

  3. #13

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    Originally Posted by MacGyverRI
    You hate men and need to get over that by starting with a clean slate ea. time.

    Not all men are the same and you probably, like many people do, go for the same type look that always ends up being the same bad guy time and time again.
    MacgyverRI,
    There are alot of BAD men out there and that's why it's hard for women to start a new slate.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member AntiLove_SuperStar's Avatar
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    Lots of bad women out there, too.

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  6. #15
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    I think the OP comes accross a little angry but I do understand where she is coming from.

    it is one thing if you are just dating and talking to guys online and there is no talk of exclusivity, then of course you can expect them to be talking to other women as you should be talking to other men too.

    That all changes when there is a promise of exclusivity. I think pretending to be another member of the opposite sex and emailing your partner might be a good way to find out if they are out shopping for the BBD while professing their undying love and devotion to you!

    I have always wanted to do that but frankly, i am afraid to do it. I am afraid that he would take the bait. I am afraid that if I emailed him and exchanged pics and making mine a little prettier and younger that he would go for it. It would be too painful to know that he was just settling for me until someone better came along. So I won't do it as I want to remain blissfully ignorant.

  7. #16
    Super Moderator annie24's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by melrich
    It pays to be very careful when "cyber dating". I am not totally sure of your methods because,

    1) typically most people looking for dates on-line are talking to multiple people anyway.
    2) You should be sceptical about anyone wanting a relationship with you before they have actually met you.
    3) If they are not lying then YOU become the lying cheater by having another false account and making out like you are interested in him.

    And all men do not lie. That is just hysterical nonsense.
    I agree 100%.

    I have done online dating myself, and most people are dating several others until there is a mutual decision to become exclusive.

    second, if a man is promising you love and marriage in the first few e-mails, there is something wrong. they are trying to charm the pants off of you. I had one guy e-mail things like this to me, and he turned out to be a creep. If a man starts e-mailing you about marriage and you haven't even met him, and given your history with men, you should just delete him and move onto the next.

    And yes, you are lying also to find out if he is a liar. not a good combo.

    Anyways, when I did online dating, most of the men did NOT send me offers of love and marriage - their e-mails were in general, polite and friendly and about vacations and sports and their careers. So part of me is wondering if you wrote some things in your profile that could be red flags. You should have a friend read over your profile and get her feedback. If you would like, you can pm me your profile and i can see if anything sticks out.

    "The Rules for Online Dating" by ellen fein and sherry schnieder also have many good tips for writing a profile and tips on how to weed out married men, players, and time-wasters.

  8. #17
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    Nice guys finish last. Plenty of us around, but from my experiences alot of women have a knack of being attracted to 'bad boys', who of course will treat them like dirt, then the woman comes crying back to us questioning why all men are b*stards, why we don't treat them right...because you choose to date the idiot who will treat you like a sex object and nothing else.

    This is not an attack on all women, of course not, but malicious posts like these are too tempting for myself to ignore (I'm pretty sure I'm not the only male thinking this).

    This being said, life is one big experience, you have highs and lows, one day you'll meet the right man and you'll look back and laugh about past experiences and question why you even let these men upset you.

    All the best

  9. #18
    Platinum Member southerngirl's Avatar
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    All men are not liars. Girls lie too.

    You have to weed through them to find the right one for you.

  10. #19
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    Originally Posted by Consumed
    Nice guys finish last. Plenty of us around, but from my experiences alot of women have a knack of being attracted to 'bad boys', who of course will treat them like dirt, then the woman comes crying back to us questioning why all men are b*stards, why we don't treat them right...because you choose to date the idiot who will treat you like a sex object and nothing else.
    Sorry, but it's just not true that nice guys finish last. I know plenty of truley nice guys who are happily taken. And plenty of guys who pretend to be nice who aren't, and vice-versa. Also, most women wouldn't put up with the bad treatment if it started out that way (actually I think the OP made that quite clear). However, if bad guys choose to lie to us and disguise their true intentions, then sometimes it takes us a while to discover that they were merely lying, and unfortunately by then we've become emotionally involved, which is a perfectly natural human emotion. Obviously, the OP was looking for a nice guy, or she wouldn't have fallen for his 'nice' act.

  11. #20
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    I don't know. It is true that people with bad intentions would of course disguise it to get what they want. And it can take a while to uncover what someone is hiding. You can know someone for decades without knowing some deep, dark secret of theirs or something wrong or horrible that they might be doing behind your back. Overall I think that's the right idea, even if you have to lie to extract the truth, I mean you can't be too careful in today's world can you?

    What does "the BBD" mean, by the way?

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