The Insecurity Epidemic – Why Are Americans Struggling with Intimacy?

As times slowly change, generations pass and technology advances, it is easier to notice alterations and perturbations that come along in their wake. Take, for instance, the situation with American relationships; intimate connections seem to be fading with each passing year. We as a nation are approaching what is known as an "insecurely attached" era. To clarify, insecurity attachment is not just a term used to describe romantic relationships; it is applicable to many aspects of our lives including platonic relationships, familial bonds, and work relationships. Whether or not you know it, you have probably seen the patterns of insecurity through the years.

The Humanization of Technology

One of the major factors contributing to this phenomenon is our relationship with technology. In the twenty-first century, it has become increasingly difficult to disconnect from technology and regain that sense of humanity we so desperately need. We no longer talk face-to-face with people in our daily lives, but instead use social media and text messages. Conversation gets boiled down on reduced to 140 characters, cause, and effect gets lost somewhere along the way throughout the transmission. This creates not only a decreased ability to process and comprehend emotions, but also restricts our capacity to react through speech or body language. Without suitable tools to demonstrate our emotions, relationships become more unpredictable, challenging, and harder to maintain.

The Rising Fear Of Commitment

On top of our ongoing reliance on technology, fear of commitment has been reflected in the changing attitude and behavior of individuals in all types of relationships. We don't seem to be able to rely on one person for any meaningful duration; a new person is always one veneer away. Consequently, insecurity sets in once we realize our partners have moved on or when that person doesn't measure up to our expectations. As a result, attachment has become less stable as people become more anxious about trusting and relying on others, persons are constantly waking in fear, and many of us developing a preference for instant gratification rather than tangible intimacy.

The Growth of Comparison Mentality

Our increasing obsession with technology leads us to the habit of comparing ourselves to one another and undermining our individual efforts to build strong relationships. With the constant barrage of stunning photos, flawless lifestyles, and seemingly unreal body shapes, it quickly becomes easier to focus on what we don't have instead of our potential successes. We set unrealistic expectations and demand perfection; any little flaws get overrun. This creates a huge dichotomy between what actually exists and how we expect our relationships to look like on the outside. It takes away the understanding and acceptance of imperfections and distance within relationships.

A New Connection Effort

The detached feeling towards relationships isn't completely masking the strong desire for meaningful interaction. As humans, many of us crave the feeling of connection, closeness, and communication that can only come about in meaningful relationships. Although insecurity has been steadily increasing, there is still hope for the future. More and more people are beginning to recognize the necessity for emotional investment and commitment when it comes to forming and maintaining healthy relationships.

Solutions for Our Troubles

It may not be easy to obtain, but emotional connectedness can be achieved if we make a conscious effort to commit to building relationships built on trust, honesty, and open communication. This can be achieved by letting go of expectations and comparison, depending on technology less, and striving to form relationships that bring out the best in both parties. We need to take a step back and relearn the long-forgotten basics of forming meaningful relationships. Remember, it all starts with basic communication, honest self-expression, and mutual understanding.

Intimate connections are a human necessity, and if we don't start investing enough effort into relationships, we might be leading ourselves down a dark and desolate path full of insecurity and disappointment. We must take action now and set forth efforts to ensure our relationships remain hearty, genuine, and valuable in the fearful times that lay ahead.