My partner and I are constantly fighting. How can we resolve our conflicts?

The sound of a dish shattering on the floor brings all the happiness in the room to a sudden halt. Your eyes connect with your partner's for just a second and yet, it's enough. You've been here before - you both know that nothing good can come of this fight.

Conflict is an unavoidable part of any relationship. Differences in viewpoints, interests, and goals can be hard to reconcile, especially when there are strong feelings of hurt and betrayal involved. The good news is that fights don't have to dominate dating, marriages, or any other type of relationship. It takes dedication and care to learn how to combat conflict and resolve issues without letting hurtful words, stress, or resentment seep into the situation.

To get started on the path towards harmonious relationships and open communication, it's important to take a close look at yourself and your partner. What draws you two together? What makes you unique as individuals? Looking closely at your similarities and differences as individuals can help you and your partner find new ways to handle conflicts as they arise.

One key factor in resolving conflicts is understanding the idea of “active listening” - fully being present in the conversation and allowing both parties to express their views honestly and openly. This can sound easy on paper yet be very difficult in real life. To give active listening a try, one person should speak for no more than one minute at a time, uninterrupted, and then the other should repeat what they heard to ensure that everyone is on the same page. After taking turns, discuss what you have co-created, showing respect and empathy to each other.

Another thing to keep in mind is that effective communication isn’t just about arguing until you arrive at an agreement. It requires trying to put yourself in the shoes of the other person, in order to better understand where they’re coming from. Even if you can’t agree on something, understanding your partner's position and where they're coming from can be beneficial on its own.

Of course, it’s also necessary to work on managing emotions in the heat of the moment. We all have had moments of saying something we regret or getting too defensive or angry. It’s not wrong to feel those things, but it does help to be mindful about them and being in control. Take deep breaths and remind yourself that this is an opportunity to strengthen your relationship rather than tear it down. Agree to take a “time out” if necessary and talk things through later when you have calmed down.

Finally, remember that many of our fights have deeper underlying causes such as jealousy, insecurity, or fear of abandonment. It’s important to acknowledge these fears and learn to cope with them in constructive ways. It’s ok to ask for help from a qualified therapist, friend, or family member who can provide objective insight and guide you both towards finding a resolution.

Conflicts do not have to lead to the end of any relationship. In fact, they can be a catalyst for stronger bonds and understanding if handled correctly. Through active listening and compassionate understanding, compromise and mutual respect can shine through and bring you closer together.